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Depression and Suicide If you or a loved one is feeling depressed or suicidal, you are not alone. Talk with other users about your feelings here.

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  (#1 (permalink)) Old
GhostOfNod Offline
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Question Need advice - May 24th 2017, 06:17 AM

I'm new here and not exactly sure how I came across this site but I need some advice... I'm 17 and for a long time now (since I was about 14) I have been very depressed. Recently I have been thinking of killing myself. I'm just not able to take it anymore, and I am worried I'll do something drastic. I never told anyone about how I feel and no one knows. I can't tell my parents (as I tried once letting them know how I felt and they only got mad at me and yelled at me) so should I tell one of my teachers in school (we don't have a consular at our school and I have no friends)? I think I need help but I can't have my parents find out and don't know who to talk too. I don't want my parents to think different of me or get mad at me.

Last edited by GhostOfNod; May 25th 2017 at 04:33 AM.
   
  (#2 (permalink)) Old
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Re: Need advice - May 25th 2017, 01:29 AM

Firstly, it is very brave of you just to come to this site and admit you are feeling this way, be proud of yourself!

But, I am very sorry you have been dealing with this for so long, and that nobody really knows. My advice for you is to go to someone you trust, which would most likely be a teacher from the sounds of it. They are well equipped to deal with things like this and will be a great first step. Go to one you trust, and I can guarantee it will help. Also, know you can always IM me if you need anything at all
   
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GhostOfNod Offline
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Re: Need advice - May 25th 2017, 04:35 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by FrozenRobot7 View Post
Firstly, it is very brave of you just to come to this site and admit you are feeling this way, be proud of yourself!

But, I am very sorry you have been dealing with this for so long, and that nobody really knows. My advice for you is to go to someone you trust, which would most likely be a teacher from the sounds of it. They are well equipped to deal with things like this and will be a great first step. Go to one you trust, and I can guarantee it will help. Also, know you can always IM me if you need anything at all
If I do decide to tell a teacher how I feel, how would I do so or what should I say? I'm very bad at talking to people and I wouldn't know what to say. Do you know if they would contact my parents?
   
  (#4 (permalink)) Old
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Re: Need advice - May 25th 2017, 09:39 AM

Is it ok if I call you nod?
Im going to assume yes, and use it because it's short.

Nod, I know exactly what you are going through.

I went into a deep depression about a year ago. My stepdad got falsely accused of a crime(Im not going to go into details, it is a sensitive topic.) and got sent to jail (they cleaned his record, a co-worker was being a royal ass). I wasn't allowed to see him for half a year. he came back just before I ended 8th grade. Durring his time awy from us, one of my freinds killed himself (again, no detail. too sensitive.) already depressed me went into a deep dark hole of living hell. I would cut so that I woud feel ok. one day, a freind named James (not actual name) said, "I know that you want to stop cutting. I have a plan that will let you stop. he said here. give me your blades. Ill keep them untill you get over your depression!" I went along with it. little did I know, James had given them to the counselor. I was really upset, and school officials are required to tell a parental guardian. my parents found out. yay. They yelled at me for "making our family look bad," I didn't even care anymore by that point, so I walked away from the house. I saw a freind. he gave me drugs saying they would "ease my pain away." And those drugs did. The payoff was that I felt even worse and more emotional about my problems. I turned Into a drug addict who cant go more than week without drugs at a time. I am getting better e ven though I just lost a grandfather, a freind, and my dignity in the last semester. my friend that died last month taught me something very important. no matter how bad you feel, no matter the pain, keep on going. If you give up and commit suicide, you don't hurt yourself. You hurt everyone around you. you hurt a lot of people that care for you (ei: entire TH community), and your freinds. you said you have none. that is not true. as long as you need help, you can pm me or anyone else (sometimes others. always me. I will reply the second I get a chance. its ussualy going to be sent at night.) freinds are a key part. figure out why you became depressed in the first place. DON'T. DO. DRUGS. DONT CUT.(It's in all caps because it's important!). get help from a trusted adult or freind that is NOT related to the government, your family, or a therapist. Therapists have not been good for me. you may be different. try a session or two. see if you like it. see if it is helpful. Therapy needs to be helpful for it to work. if you enjoy it, even better! If you need any help or Ideas (or if you just need a freind), pm me. I don't want more people killing themselves. 2 is enough for 1 year. Don't end it. we are all here for you!

-keags
   
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  (#5 (permalink)) Old
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Re: Need advice - May 25th 2017, 06:08 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by yeetlord View Post
Is it ok if I call you nod?
Im going to assume yes, and use it because it's short.

Nod, I know exactly what you are going through.

I went into a deep depression about a year ago. My stepdad got falsely accused of a crime(Im not going to go into details, it is a sensitive topic.) and got sent to jail (they cleaned his record, a co-worker was being a royal ass). I wasn't allowed to see him for half a year. he came back just before I ended 8th grade. Durring his time awy from us, one of my freinds killed himself (again, no detail. too sensitive.) already depressed me went into a deep dark hole of living hell. I would cut so that I woud feel ok. one day, a freind named James (not actual name) said, "I know that you want to stop cutting. I have a plan that will let you stop. he said here. give me your blades. Ill keep them untill you get over your depression!" I went along with it. little did I know, James had given them to the counselor. I was really upset, and school officials are required to tell a parental guardian. my parents found out. yay. They yelled at me for "making our family look bad," I didn't even care anymore by that point, so I walked away from the house. I saw a freind. he gave me drugs saying they would "ease my pain away." And those drugs did. The payoff was that I felt even worse and more emotional about my problems. I turned Into a drug addict who cant go more than week without drugs at a time. I am getting better e ven though I just lost a grandfather, a freind, and my dignity in the last semester. my friend that died last month taught me something very important. no matter how bad you feel, no matter the pain, keep on going. If you give up and commit suicide, you don't hurt yourself. You hurt everyone around you. you hurt a lot of people that care for you (ei: entire TH community), and your freinds. you said you have none. that is not true. as long as you need help, you can pm me or anyone else (sometimes others. always me. I will reply the second I get a chance. its ussualy going to be sent at night.) freinds are a key part. figure out why you became depressed in the first place. DON'T. DO. DRUGS. DONT CUT.(It's in all caps because it's important!). get help from a trusted adult or freind that is NOT related to the government, your family, or a therapist. Therapists have not been good for me. you may be different. try a session or two. see if you like it. see if it is helpful. Therapy needs to be helpful for it to work. if you enjoy it, even better! If you need any help or Ideas (or if you just need a freind), pm me. I don't want more people killing themselves. 2 is enough for 1 year. Don't end it. we are all here for you!

-keags
I am very grateful you took the time to respond. Thank you so much for your advice. I was doing some research about my school and I found out that if I talk to a teacher or school counselor about feeling suicidal, self harming or being depressed they are required to tell my parents everything I told them so that is out of the question now too .

What do I do? I really don't have any friends, I can't tell my parents, I don't have any adults I know or trust (I don't trust anyone) and I can't tell a school teacher or counselor. Writing this makes me even more sad knowing how stupid I am and how much of a worthless case I am..
   
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Re: Need advice - May 25th 2017, 08:35 PM

HI there,

First of all, welcome to TeenHelp! I stumbled across this site many years ago, I think I was just searching for a teen help site. You should be very proud of yourself for reaching out for help. This is never an easy thing to do, but you have done it. Well done!

Since I was a child, even to this day, I still get thoughts of suicide. I have tried to act upon the thoughts a couple times, but I am still here, and part of me, is happy about that. You're young, you still have so much to live for.

There are many hotlines that you can try using since you don't have many resources close to you. Another option I highly recommend is going to see your doctor. Your doctor is a huge resource and can help you figure things out. Since you're almost 18, I believe it's against the law for him/her to disclose any information about what you two talk about. Tell him exactly how you're feeling.

I hope this helps!
Stay Strong,
Brittany



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  (#7 (permalink)) Old
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Re: Need advice - May 25th 2017, 09:48 PM

Hey there,

First of all, welcome! We're really glad to have you here and if there's anything I can do to help you get used to the site features and how all of us weird and wonderful people work here, then let me know! You're welcome to drop me a VM or a PM anytime, even if it's just or a bit of friendly chit chat! I'm sure you'll fit in just fine, of course, we're all splendid people, but just in case you have any concerns, know I'm always happy to help!

I do think it's wonderful you've come here to ask for help considering you've had a hard time reaching out for your parents - and I'm so sorry that they reacted in that way when you tried to ask them for help. Sometimes people react in really odd ways when they hear something that is quite upsetting, and understandably, it makes us want to take a step back and close off again. I'm really glad to see that you're looking for other ways to make people aware of the situation though, and I think that if there's a teacher you trust at school, you should definitely ask if you can have a quiet word with them about what's happening. While they might not have a counsellor you can speak to at the school, they may have other services that they can refer you to, or people at the school who are knowledgeable in these areas who may be of use. I think it'll be really useful to make them aware of it so that you're not dealing with this all on your own, because feelings like this make you feel quite isolated anyway, so it's best not to go through it on your own if you can help it.

Brittany has given you a really useful link to the hotlines page here on TH which I hope will help a bit! Other than these, are there things you like to do which you can try when you're feeling particularly vulnerable? If you're getting negative feelings, you could try expressing them somehow, for example. Some people like to write diaries, or poems or stories, and others like to draw things. Otherwise, if you like to run or walk, go out for some fresh air to an area where there are other people, so maybe a park or a local highstreet, and take a breather for a bit. Try not to be on your own if you're feeling a bit unhappy and like you might be a danger to yourself, as being around other people may prevent you from acting on these thoughts. Although they're present, and strong at times too, the fact you're posting here and looking into reaching out to other people in real life is a really good sign that a part of you still wants to fight this. I know you can fight it, and it may be difficult but you can get through it. As Brittany said above, you're young and have a lot to live for, and I know sometimes it may not feel that way, but in a few years time there are a million places you could be other than where you are now. Think of all the happiness you are entitled to and worthy of - and that's a lot - and work for it. It isn't always easy, but it is always worth it.

I hope you're doing ok. As I have said, if you need anyone to chat to, drop me a message any time!


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JustTheKeags Offline
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Re: Need advice - May 25th 2017, 10:16 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by GhostOfNod View Post
I am very grateful you took the time to respond. Thank you so much for your advice. I was doing some research about my school and I found out that if I talk to a teacher or school counselor about feeling suicidal, self harming or being depressed they are required to tell my parents everything I told them so that is out of the question now too .

What do I do? I really don't have any friends, I can't tell my parents, I don't have any adults I know or trust (I don't trust anyone) and I can't tell a school teacher or counselor. Writing this makes me even more sad knowing how stupid I am and how much of a worthless case I am..
I'll put it in a very simple list.

A.) Talk to someone. I know that this can be very stressful, I have some trust issues too. That someone can be anyone you trust. If you dont feel like talking to someone right away, Pets are a good place to start. (there is be no judgement.)

B.) findout why you are sad. Sometimes this can be for the stupidest reasons, but anything is valid. focus on improving your additute toward that thing or reason.

C.) help yourself. Sometimes, other people can't help you. you need to feel better. you will seem more gooder (it's a word) to everyone around you.

D.) Be more outgoing. One of the hardest things to do is definitely this. being outgoing and trust issues don't mix in any way at all, making this hard. (I know what its like to do this. It took over 2 months to tell my BEST freind. It really helps.)

I hope this list helps. It was hard for me, so I know it will be hard for you. Stick through it.

-Keags
   
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