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Elianaa Offline
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Name: Eliana
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I知 doing it. - January 28th 2018, 06:01 AM

This thread has been labeled as triggering, particularly on the subject of suicide, by the original poster or by a Moderator. The contents of this thread therefore might not be suitable for certain sensitive users. Please take this into consideration before continuing to read.

I’m done I’m done. Everything’s going wrong. School,family and now my best friend who I was planning on meeting irl has commited suicide. He was so so young only 13. He just couldn’t handle it anymore and I tried to help but I just couldn’t, he wouldn’t listen. And I wanna be with him. If I do it too I’ll be able to finally meet the one person who was there when nobody else cared. I wanna continue to have people who are there for me but unless I do it I can’t. This hit me so fucking hard and I can’t beleive my best friend is gone. I’ve cut edited

Last edited by Spoons; January 29th 2018 at 12:47 AM.
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Adele101 Offline
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Re: I知 doing it. - January 29th 2018, 10:18 PM

Don't do anything. If your referring to ending your life, give your self a certain number of hours and see if after that amount of time, you still feel the same way. My online counsellor gave me that as an option when I'm feeling suicidal. So for example, give yourself 4 days to calm down and after those 4 days you may not feel the same way. This doesn't mean that if, after those 4 hours you still want to harm yourself, you do so. You give yourself another 4 days. This technique allows you to calm down before making rash decisions.

Im so so sorry about your best friend. But I'm sure you've heard this before: what happened to he/she is not your fault. Nothing you could have said or done wouldve changed their mind. The pain youre going thrpugh is indescribable but please, please don't act on your suicidal thoughts so soon. Your feeling grief and that is a contributing factor to your suicidal thoughts.

I know nothing I say will help you now, but I hope you find comfort in the fact that millions of people around the world feel just like you. You're not alone. I hope you find comfort in the fact that I, (probably half way across the world from you) am sincerely hoping youre well, and that you find a way to survive this.

I honestly wish you all the best, and once again I'm so sorry for your loss.

PM me if you ever need to talk

Keep calm and carry on.
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Sophrosyne Offline
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Re: I知 doing it. - January 30th 2018, 05:55 AM

Hey Eliana,

I know things seem hopeless right now, especially after your friend passing away, but I want you to know that things do get better. Even if it doesn't feel like it right now, they really do get better. Nothing is going to be able to bring your friend back and it is always hard losing a friend, especially when they're close, and yes you may never fully get over that loss, but the pain will lessen and you will find other friends that can be just as close. Instead of dying to try and be with your friend, how about you try and keep moving forward as I'm sure that's what your friend would want. You didn't want your friend to die and he would want the same.

Have you got people around you that you can talk to? When you lose someone it's always good to have people you know that support you and can provide guidance. Finding a therapist would most likely be the most beneficial at this time however it is also good to have other people as well, like friends, family members, teachers, school guidance counsellors and chaplains, or even a family doctor. You did mention that your family was going wrong, however there might be even just one person that you trust enough in your family, or a relative that you don't live with but can contact if they live close by. Also know that there's also us supporting you, we all want the best for you and none of us want to see you hurt, I know I don't. If you want immediate help you are welcome to use Live Help as we all know the support forums take some time to get answers.

What is going wrong at school? If it is just school work then you are able to get support from teachers to help, even if teachers are intimidating it is always better to get support from them and let them know what is going on so they can help. You might even be able to get extensions on assignments if you need them, I know I got several while I was at school due to a lot of problems going on so if you need assistance, teachers don't mind giving it. That's what they're there for.

Again, losing a friend is hard and I know that can be really difficult to deal with. But things do get easier over time, especially when you have the right people supporting you. You are allowed to mourn your friend, you have as much time as you need, but no matter how much it hurts, giving up is not the way to go. Like you said, you wanted to help your friend and he wouldn't listen, now is your chance to listen to us even if he couldn't do the same.

You are always welcome to message me whenever you need, and I hope things improve for you.

Take care.

Senior HelpLINK Mentor | Forum Moderator
Clothed in strength and dignity,
and laughs without fear of the future.
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