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I can't do it anymore.. - May 29th 2009, 07:02 AM

This thread has been labeled as triggering by the original poster or by a Moderator. Please take this into consideration before continuing to read.

People keep saying that if I'm strong and push through it, these feelings won't last forever... that someday I'll be happy and normal. But how the fuck am I supposed to believe that? I've been severely depressed since junior high and I've cut and burned myself for the past few years. I just don't know how to deal with feeling like shit all the time.

And I'm having an especially hard time at the moment because I went camping with my best friend this weekend and it did not go well. She begged me to go with her even though I didn't know any of the people because she didn't want to go alone. And me, being her best friend, went along even though I didn't want to. It was so pointless for me to go, she pretty much ignored me once we got there, and when she wasn't ignoring me, she was being outright rude and mean to me. This was the first time she's ever done that, and it hurt really bad. I though we were tight, but I guess I was wrong. I thought she was the one person that would never betray me and she did. I really feel like I'm alone in this world now. I want to cry and punch her at the same time. I can't believe how she treated me when I was there doing a favor for her. I just don't know how much more of this kind of shit I can take before I break down.
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Re: I can't do it anymore.. - May 29th 2009, 10:57 AM

Hey, have you tried talking to her? Laying it straight that she has basically taken the piss when you were doing her a favour? Remember, if she wants to be a bitch and lose a friend like you, it's HER LOSS, because you sound like a really loyal, dedicated person who would make a great friend to anyone


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Re: I can't do it anymore.. - May 30th 2009, 05:06 AM

Ya, I tried talking to her about it but she just basically brushed it off and told me to get over it. I am just really confused about why she is acting like this. We've never had any problems before. I guess it just really caught me off guard. She's been one of my best friends since as far back as I can remember, and we've always bickered (lol) but we never had any real problems. sheesh
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Re: I can't do it anymore.. - May 30th 2009, 05:35 AM

Hey there,

I'm sorry to hear about what's been going on. I can definitely see how getting a response like that from your friend would be really confusing.

But remember, it doesn't reflect back on anything about you. Maybe she's just being in a really wierd mood right now, but you deserve to have how you feel paid attention to. As your friend, she should pay attention to you. Dignity is not negotiable.

Okay, yeah, I am going to say that things will get better. But that's only because they will. Sometimes it just takes what feels like an unfairly long time - but once they do, the brighter parts definitely outshine any former darkness. I understand how you feel, though - but it's important to remember that even if "what's wrong" doesn't go away right away, you still deserve to find ways to at least be happy or know that you can get through it in the mean time. What are some things that you like doing, that you could do for you, to at least find some time, even if it's a brief moment, when you can find a way to make things feel "better?" You get to do favors for yourself, too.

Hang in there. We're always here for ya


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Re: I can't do it anymore.. - May 30th 2009, 10:44 AM

It does seem wierd. Well tell her that she needs to sort her attitude big time else she can forget having you as a friend. Being friends with you is a priviledge - don't let people abuse that


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