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  (#1 (permalink)) Old
Nickylk Offline
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Bad thoughts - September 28th 2019, 03:49 AM

So lately I have been having bad thoughts about harming myself or ways that I could just end it....

I am not going to go into depth of it but I feel trapped in my living situation and my family makes me feel guilty when I say I want to move out.

I just cant anymore. My depression has gotten worse over the past couple weeks, im always irritable....

Everyone ive talked to has said "why don't you just move out?" because its not that easy for me. I don't have good credit, I have multiple credit cards I am paying on. I don't have car that's mine.....I'm trapped and I feel like theres no way out.

Edgar Allen Poe "And so all the night-tide, I lie down by the side of my darling-my darling-my life and my bride, in the sepulcher there by the sea".
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  (#2 (permalink)) Old
Odyne Offline
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Re: Bad thoughts - September 30th 2019, 03:25 PM

Hi Nicky <3
First of all: BIG HUG

I've been through something like you, and it's hard, I know.
But don't hurt yourself, okay? I'm sure you're lovely.

Just send me a PM if you want.
I'm here for you

Hugs from Lucy

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I'm here for you, if you need to talk.

“I am beginning to measure myself in strength, not pounds. Sometimes in smiles.”
Laurie Halse Anderson, Wintergirls
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FrozenRobot7 Offline
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Re: Bad thoughts - October 6th 2019, 08:02 PM

First off, just know there are always alternatives to any situation, and hurting yourself is not one of those alternatives. Do you have any friends you can talk to about this and everything with your home life? If you can't get out of the living situation you're in, then at least talking to someone around you will at least get it off of your chest and out into the open.

If you need someone to talk to, my pm's are always open

Everything will be okay in the end. If it’s not okay, it’s not the end- John Lennon❤️❤️
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Rivière Offline
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Re: Bad thoughts - October 7th 2019, 02:27 PM

I've been in a similar situation. It's not easy. It feels like you're a towel being constantly wrung out. Being stuck at home is incredibly hard and the isolation is even worse. More so when living with family because their behaviour can add to the pressure you face when you can't leave home.

I don't know if you're able to because you mentioned you're paying on multiple credit cards, but you could consider seeing if you can take up some form of education that requires you to move long-distance to study. Possibly one that you can be financed for. It's not really a complete solution to the problem, but it does give breathing room, independence, and a way for you to play your future without family interference. I ended up doing this and it honestly helped a lot. Sure I had to return to living with my family, but the whole atmosphere was different when I returned, I was treated differently, and my family behaved a lot differently too.

If this isn't possible, as suggested, you could try chatting with a friend and come up with a solution, or maybe you could stay over with them for a few days to help give you some breathing space. In addition, you could see if any friends/family would be willing to sub you some money to pay off any fees since usually there's no interest involved, just the direct return of the money loaned.

Regardless of whether these options do/don't pan out, take one step at a time, look at your options for paying back any money owed on your credit cards, try not to take out loans or other finances that require you to pay a return with interest because this will only deepen any debt you may have and make things worse.

If you have a job, calculate your finances, your incoming and outgoing fees and see what you're left with. See which debts you have to pay and how much they are, then organise paying them off in terms of one at a time if possible, or at least trying to pay off some in a smaller return than another one so you can 'focus' more on paying off one debt at a time, and eventually that debt will cease to exist so you can focus on other ones.

Life is for living, not for losing.
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Re: Bad thoughts - October 30th 2019, 05:58 AM

Step by step and never give up. Never gonna stop.
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