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Smile oh well, - June 29th 2009, 01:22 AM

so i don't know where this would really go it could fit in mutipal forums. but this will probably be one of my last posts for awhile because today has actually been a pretty; life changing, dare i say day?

well it started off pretty bad and i thought well this sucks, life sucks, everything sucks. so by the time i got to church i was in "screw life" mode. i should have known that wouldn't fly there. so anyways the pastor started preaching about "what do you want and how bad you want it," and i just kept thinking about getting better and stop cutting. so then he all started, "a lot of people don't have a place that's different, every place is the same to them and that's why it's hard, you need to find a place..." and i'm thinking "you know, church is kind of my place because it doesn't matter how bad it is by the time i leave there, i'm fine... and when it starts getting bad, i just keep reminding myself i just have to make it til sundayy.."

so i feel like i found something, some form of hope, some sort of place and purpose.

i started feeling a little bit better at that point and then one of the asst. pastors came up to me and she was like "hi cassie, how are you" and i'm kind of shocked she remembered me because the last time i saw/talked to her was when i was a suicidal mess and she helped me with that... even if it was just a five min. convo, so i'm thinking about maybe e-mailing her and setting up a time where i could talk to her about the suicide/cutting and things could start getting better... good idea?

also, i might get in the church counselling thing they have, so yeah. i'm pretty much set. i finally have a decent amount of people i can rely on, i finally found me... and i'm finally ready to fight this! [ =

so yeah.
like i said i don't know where this really goes, but i'd thought i'd put it here.

when life is in discord; praise ye the Lord

keep your faith alive.
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Re: oh well, - June 29th 2009, 03:01 AM

Hey Cassie,

I was so happy to read this post! I wanted to tell you that it is a great thing that you found somewhere that is 'different'. I think that helps when it comes to feeling better.

When I started college I realized that that was my place. Going to college was what helped me and I am so glad that you found your 'place' and the important thing is that no matter what church never takes a break! College ends for the summer or christmas but church doesn't and that is a plus.

Cassie, I also hope that you take part in the counseling because I think it could help you out; not to say that your pastor and asst. pastor can't help to but sometimes that extra support is a plus.

Keep holding strong because you are and pm me whenever!

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Re: oh well, - June 29th 2009, 04:38 AM

Hey Cassie,

I'm so happy that things are working out for you!!! Life-changing days are nice And you definitely deserve some sort of change, and it's awesome that you're going to work to keeping that.

I'm soooo proud of you <3

Drown in the music,
dance in the rain,
block out the thunder,
and let the scars fade.
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Re: oh well, - June 29th 2009, 03:18 PM

Hey Cassie,
I'm so happy for you Take care and keep us posted on how everything's going

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Re: oh well, - June 29th 2009, 04:27 PM

Hiya Cassie!

I'm so happy for you! I'm extremely glad that you realized your safe place, where you can have hope and always someone to rely on. That is always so important.

You should definitely check into the church counselling to help you out! I think that is just perfect!

Cassie you are so strong. I know you can beat this! It's great to have a system of real life support, and you found it. I'm glad you found you!

Keep holding on, and take care! PM me anytime you want to talk. =)
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