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Depression and Suicide If you or a loved one is feeling depressed or suicidal, you are not alone. Talk with other users about your feelings here.

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Moonlight101 Offline
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In Over My Head... - July 3rd 2009, 01:26 AM

I've been dealing with depression for almost a year now. Im in therapy and on antidepressents. Lately its gotten worse. I feel like I dont deserve to live anymore. I just cant do this anymore. I go to bed half hoping I wont wake up in the morning so I wont have to suffer another day. I cant keep living this way. Cant keep hating myself. I dont want to at all anymore. Just rather give in to everything. I've cut in the past. I just dont think I can keep dealing with all this pain. I dont want it anymore...
   
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Re: In Over My Head... - July 3rd 2009, 02:45 AM

Have you tried telling your therapist this? Maybe they can help, or give you some different antidepressants if they aren't working. Is anything going on in your life that's making you feel worse?

Other than that, maybe do something that makes you feel better, like going out and playing a sport, or listening to music.

I'm here if you need me. Hope you feel better.


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Re: In Over My Head... - July 3rd 2009, 06:43 AM

Hey there,

sorry about the late reply. I definitely second Karri's advice - talking to your therapist about maybe changing how you're approaching treatment could help a lot. And please don't hate yourself - even if there are things that you don't like about yourself, they're not what makes you who you are. And living people aren't static. They change. And you get to choose how you change - maybe try talking with your therapist about what it is about yourself you're not satisfied with, and ask for help in figuring out what you can do about that. Because we can get to being happy, with ourselves and in general. We just have to keep working at it to figure out which "how" will work for us.

Hang in there.


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Re: In Over My Head... - July 3rd 2009, 07:32 AM

Hey there,

I am sorry you are feeling so low but things can get better. I know that might be hard to heal and might be hard to believe but it is true just hang in there.

I am so glad that you are talking to someone; that is a great thing. It can really help you. I think that talking to your therapist about this would be a great idea. I know it might be a scary thought but he/she is there to help you and they might be able to.

Also, do you know what is making you feel this way? If you do maybe you could write it down and take it in to your therapist and either give the paper to her/him or just go through the list and talk about what is on it. If you don't know what is really causing this you should consider keeping a journal because that could be a great way to start figuring out what is bothering you.

I hope this helped and please hang in there. If you ever need someone to talk to feel free to pm me.


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Re: In Over My Head... - July 3rd 2009, 07:51 AM

I don't know your entire story, but I do want to give you kudos for speaking to an actual therapist. I can never speak to doctors, especially w/o lying or even saying anything at all. I think that shows you have enough strength to at least survive. My hat's off to you, and I think what you need to do is just imagine how you want to be, enter a dreamland where you were never like this, and have that be your goal to become. I don't want to give you the same advice such as try to keep your mind off of it or think optimistically because that is just too difficult when you are that hazed and in such a state. That's just my opinion, but I truly believe you have the courage to overcome this.

I'll always be here. I hope I've helped. PM me or something if you need anything, okay?


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Re: In Over My Head... - July 3rd 2009, 03:14 PM

Hey,

I know after a year of feeling depressed it can feel like it will never end. But you have to keep fighting because things will change and it is possible for you to be happy :-) I think it is great that you are seeing a therapist because that takes a great deal of strength that some people wouldn't be able to do. I guess you just have to stick with it. It might take time to help but if you talk to your therapist about what is helpful and what isn't then they can change the way they work to be the most helpful to you as possible. You do deserve to live and you deserve to be free from all these horrible feelings you have and live a happy life.

Is there anything in particular you enjoy doing? It could be anything like seeing friends, doing some exercise or reading a book. Just anything that takes your mind off how you are feeling.

You can get through this so don't give up. Stay strong :-)
   
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