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Depression and Suicide If you or a loved one is feeling depressed or suicidal, you are not alone. Talk with other users about your feelings here.

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Exclamation Well well well. - July 15th 2009, 06:33 AM

This thread has been labeled as triggering, particularly on the subject of suicide, by the original poster or by a Moderator. The contents of this thread therefore might not be suitable for certain sensitive users. Please take this into consideration before continuing to read.

No one's going to be home for two more weeks, so yeah.
They'd be happy if I was dead.
I'm just a waste of money and time to them anyways.

This is just to much for me.


“There is nothing beautiful about the wreckage of a human being.
There is nothing pretty about damage, about pain, about heartache.
What is beautiful is their strength, their resilience, their fortitude
as they display an ocean of courage when they pick through the
wreckage of their life to build something beautiful brand new,
against every odd that is stacked against them.” — Nikita Gill

Last edited by Mel; July 15th 2009 at 07:42 AM. Reason: Please do not post goodbye threads.
   
  (#2 (permalink)) Old
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Re: Well well well. - July 15th 2009, 08:01 AM

Please don't. Not yet. Can you elaborate on whats making you feel this way?
   
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Re: Well well well. - July 15th 2009, 08:17 AM

Hey Kirsty.
It sounds like you're having a tough time right now. I'm not sure what's making you feel this way, but I know that whatever it is, it's not worth your life. I know the feeling, that people might be better off if I just wasn't around. But there are a lot of people who would be negatively affected if you were to end your life, and it's not fair to you or them. You deserve to live, and you deserve to be happy. They both go hand in hand, because if you continue to live, I can guarantee that one day you will be happy.

There's always people in your life who care about you, don't let yourself forget them, no matter how tough things get. Because even when you don't believe in yourself, there's always someone out there who still does.

PM me anytime, I'm happy to listen Take care. x





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Re: Well well well. - July 15th 2009, 12:25 PM

Hey.
You seem to be having a really tough time, but I'm sure they don't see you as a waste of money or time. Why do you think that? Please talk to us, we're all here for you and want to help.
If you need to talk, just PM me


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Re: Well well well. - July 15th 2009, 06:24 PM

hey,

why do you think that they wouldn't care.
you're not a waste of time or money.
why do you think that.

can you possibly have sombody to come stay with you like a friend or go stay with somebody so that these feelings leave.
i think that you should at the very least talk to somebody about them.

i understand that things are tough but you have so much life with you. so much to live for, you're young, you haven't experienced everything life has to offer for you! trust me, you'll be happy that you are alive in the years to come. just keep hanging in there.

pm me if you would like to talk!


when life is in discord; praise ye the Lord

keep your faith alive.
we're not alone <3
   
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Re: Well well well. - July 15th 2009, 06:28 PM

everyone would care if you were dead. you don't deserve an early death, if anything, you deserve a nice long life. having people not care isn't a reason to kill yourself, it's a reason to make them care. prove to them what an amazing person you are, and things will look up. they'll always look up. PM anytime!
   
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Re: Well well well. - July 15th 2009, 07:21 PM

DONT you may waste money but who dosent right?
so just dont play with freinds get your mind off of it i was the same way ...at 9 yrs old a had i knife and just therw it after i thoght about it is there ANYTHING you really like now take it away forever thats what will happen so dont do it for yourself and if not for every1 you ever helped any1 who loves you your teachers your freinds they will be sadder then you are now
   
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Re: Well well well. - July 15th 2009, 09:40 PM

Hey Kirsty,

please don't hurt yourself. You are not a waste of anything. And if anyone makes you feel that way, don't dare listen to them. Because they're wrong.

What's been going on, hun? I promise, there are people in your life who care about you (like us!)

Hang in there. Feel free to PM me if you ever want to talk about anything.


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dance in the rain,
block out the thunder,
and let the scars fade.
   
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Re: Well well well. - July 16th 2009, 03:28 AM

I tried. >_>
I knew the rope was old but I didn't care, but it broke and I passed out when I hit the floor. I still want to die and I want to try again.
This post is pointless, I'm sorry.


“There is nothing beautiful about the wreckage of a human being.
There is nothing pretty about damage, about pain, about heartache.
What is beautiful is their strength, their resilience, their fortitude
as they display an ocean of courage when they pick through the
wreckage of their life to build something beautiful brand new,
against every odd that is stacked against them.” — Nikita Gill
   
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Re: Well well well. - July 16th 2009, 03:35 AM

Please don't. You can see that everyone here cares for you. We would all be heartbroken if you left us. Your strong, you have other options. Everyone on here would be more than happy to talk to you about this. And think about how your friends would feel if you went through with it. Your not alone, we all share your pain. Please give life a second chance. You're worth it.
   
  (#11 (permalink)) Old
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Re: Well well well. - July 16th 2009, 03:50 AM

You're thirteen, it's not as if you can work for yourself. If people aren't prepared to spend money on children, they shouldn't have them to begin with, kids use money, it's no fault of your own.

Please, there is just SO much in the world that you haven't even seen yet. Don't throw your life away now, you can be so much, do so much, meet so many people--life is awesome, don't let anyone trick you into beleiving that it's not.
   
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Re: Well well well. - July 16th 2009, 03:57 AM

killing yourself isnt the answer i dont believe they would be happy to see you dead. it can be hard being 13, your not a kid anymore but your not an adult either yet it can be a confusing time i know it was for me, i struggled in my teens i can relate to what your feeling if you wanna chat i am always here just talk before you do anything this feeling wont last feelings come and go they never stay . it may take a while but you can get through this rough patch. pm me if you wanna chat more.
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Re: Well well well. - July 16th 2009, 04:04 AM

I'm probably not, I don't want to have to fail at something again.
I think this because I know it. They've told me to my face, they even told me I was a mistake. More than once actually.
I know everyone here does, but I can't actually walk to your houses so I'm not alone. I have no friends that care enough to help me, trust me I told them I was going to they just said "ok?"


“There is nothing beautiful about the wreckage of a human being.
There is nothing pretty about damage, about pain, about heartache.
What is beautiful is their strength, their resilience, their fortitude
as they display an ocean of courage when they pick through the
wreckage of their life to build something beautiful brand new,
against every odd that is stacked against them.” — Nikita Gill
   
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Re: Well well well. - July 16th 2009, 04:13 AM

Hey Kirsty,

*hugs*

I'm so sorry for what you're going through, hun. I'm really glad that you're still here.

Don't listen to your parents. Parents for some reason sometimes malfunction and crap about their kids being "mistakes" or "burdens" or other lies like that starts coming out of their mouth. Ignore them. Just because someone's your parent doesn't mean they're right. Because hun, you're worth so much, and you're definitely not a mistake. Your parents are the ones who are mistaken in this case.

Are there any relatives, like an aunt or older cousin, or even a neighbor that you're close to whom you could tell what's going on? And if you ever really feel like you're going to hurt yourself, call 911 or a helpline (I like Hopeline, 1-800-442-HOPE), and they'll be able to help you.

Hang in there, honey. Feel free to PM me anytime.


Drown in the music,
dance in the rain,
block out the thunder,
and let the scars fade.
   
  (#15 (permalink)) Old
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Re: Well well well. - July 16th 2009, 04:15 AM

read your sig.

"Everything is temporary, Nothing is permanent.
Remember that."

it's not going to be this way forever, you're 13, you still have so many years ahead of you. years to change, years to be happy, years to find people who love you, yeah to LIVE.

i remember when i was 13, i felt the same way, that i had no purpose that i was a mistake and that nobody cared but i hung on and now i realize that maybe everything is perfect but it's going to be okay and i found myself and i found people that care. you can too.

you're just going down a rough patch. turn around and start walking on a new one!

i'm sorry that your parents have called you a mistake, that's not cool. but you are NOT A MISTAKE! it doesn't matter what they say you aren't and you are destined for greatness if you just hang on and don't let go, never let go.

you're going to be okay.
you're not alone.
pm me anytime.
<3


when life is in discord; praise ye the Lord

keep your faith alive.
we're not alone <3
   
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Re: Well well well. - July 16th 2009, 04:32 AM

I just don't want to end up in the hospital again. The sad thing is though, my parents aren't telling me this. It's my brothers and grandparents.
I could go with my aunt, but she can barely support her own kids. I don't want to be the reason they can't have a good life with any less than they already have.


“There is nothing beautiful about the wreckage of a human being.
There is nothing pretty about damage, about pain, about heartache.
What is beautiful is their strength, their resilience, their fortitude
as they display an ocean of courage when they pick through the
wreckage of their life to build something beautiful brand new,
against every odd that is stacked against them.” — Nikita Gill
   
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Re: Well well well. - July 16th 2009, 04:44 AM

Mmm, I understand the sibling situation. My sister can be the same way. But a lot of times, people just can't deal with their own faults and so make themselves feel better by telling other people that they're the ones at fault, that there's something wrong with them. But please don't listen to them when they just project their own insecurities onto you to make themselves feel better for it. You deserve to be good to you, to do things to care for you.

I know that hospitals can be scary. But keeping you safe is a priority. Talking to someone at a helpline won't necessarily automatically get you put in a hospital, though. And could you maybe try calling your aunt up or something to at least talk to her? Maybe hang out with her some, to get you away from your house, but that way you don't actually have to worry about the logistics of living with her? And she maybe might be able to help you talk to your brother and grandparents, because they don't have the right to treat you that way and should be told that they're out of line and need to fix that.


Drown in the music,
dance in the rain,
block out the thunder,
and let the scars fade.
   
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Re: Well well well. - July 16th 2009, 04:58 AM

I just got out of the hospital after being in there for a month and I don't want that to happen again.
If I did call a helpline could they put me in a hospital?
I feel so hopeless.


“There is nothing beautiful about the wreckage of a human being.
There is nothing pretty about damage, about pain, about heartache.
What is beautiful is their strength, their resilience, their fortitude
as they display an ocean of courage when they pick through the
wreckage of their life to build something beautiful brand new,
against every odd that is stacked against them.” — Nikita Gill
   
  (#19 (permalink)) Old
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Re: Well well well. - July 16th 2009, 05:06 AM

it depends what helpline you call most of them are will not tell.
dancer, gave a good one 1-800-442-HOPE or call the suicide hotline.
the number shouldn't come up on your phone bill.
it's not hopeless, promise [:


when life is in discord; praise ye the Lord

keep your faith alive.
we're not alone <3
   
  (#20 (permalink)) Old
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Re: Well well well. - July 16th 2009, 05:34 AM

the help lines are there for help. whatever they do they will do to help you. you need help if you still want to kill yourself. get help. you don't want to go to the hospital again. there may be some meds that can help you. they'll make yo feel better and not want to kill yourself anymore. PM me anytime!
   
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Re: Well well well. - July 16th 2009, 06:02 AM

Kirsty, I promise it's not hopeless. There's always hope. Even if we can't see it. But that's what hope is - belief in a better that we can't see.

And please don't hesitate to call a helpline - they won't try to force you into a hospital or anything right away, I think, but they will try to help keep you safe. But they typically try to just talk to you first.

Hang in there.


Drown in the music,
dance in the rain,
block out the thunder,
and let the scars fade.
   
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Re: Well well well. - July 16th 2009, 06:12 AM

I promise you guys, I'm not going to do anything to hurt myself. I have my medicine now and it finally started working.
Had a nice talk with my mailman today on why it didn't come, turns out it did. My mail man told me he brought it two days ago. My brother just decided to hide it from me and without it I get extremely suicidal.
I'm sorry for making yous all worry about me.


“There is nothing beautiful about the wreckage of a human being.
There is nothing pretty about damage, about pain, about heartache.
What is beautiful is their strength, their resilience, their fortitude
as they display an ocean of courage when they pick through the
wreckage of their life to build something beautiful brand new,
against every odd that is stacked against them.” — Nikita Gill
   
  (#23 (permalink)) Old
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Re: Well well well. - July 16th 2009, 06:57 AM

i'm glad you're going to be okay (:
if you ever need anything, don't hesitate to let me know !


when life is in discord; praise ye the Lord

keep your faith alive.
we're not alone <3
   
  (#24 (permalink)) Old
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Re: Well well well. - July 16th 2009, 07:28 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by ey gum [: View Post
I promise you guys, I'm not going to do anything to hurt myself. I have my medicine now and it finally started working.
Had a nice talk with my mailman today on why it didn't come, turns out it did. My mail man told me he brought it two days ago. My brother just decided to hide it from me and without it I get extremely suicidal.
I'm sorry for making yous all worry about me.
Aw, I'm glad you're feeling better Kirsty.
Hopefully things stay that way.
*Hugs*





A lonely soul in a land of broken hearts


   
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Re: Well well well. - July 16th 2009, 11:57 AM

As long as they don't hide my medicine from me again things will be fine.
I even have the proof my brother hid it and wanted me to kill myself. He admitted it over the phone, but he didn't know I was recording it.
I think it's illegal to record over the phone, but if it gets me out of here then I don't care.

And when I turn 14 hopefully I can get a job and move in with my aunt.


“There is nothing beautiful about the wreckage of a human being.
There is nothing pretty about damage, about pain, about heartache.
What is beautiful is their strength, their resilience, their fortitude
as they display an ocean of courage when they pick through the
wreckage of their life to build something beautiful brand new,
against every odd that is stacked against them.” — Nikita Gill
   
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Re: Well well well. - July 17th 2009, 04:11 AM

Hey Kirsty,

*hugs*

I'm glad you're okay, hun, and that things are working out. And good job doing what you need to do to make sure that you're okay - keep doing that. I'm really proud of you.

Hang in there


Drown in the music,
dance in the rain,
block out the thunder,
and let the scars fade.
   
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Re: Well well well. - July 17th 2009, 10:27 PM

Kirsty im so sorry I was gone when you were feeling this way. Its really good to hear your doing better. People care about you even if you dont think so I care about you a lot and enjoy our little chats we have.


   
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