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  (#1 (permalink)) Old
ggg93 Offline
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Exclamation Need help - July 19th 2009, 02:52 PM

This thread has been labeled as triggering, particularly on the subject of suicide, by the original poster or by a Moderator. The contents of this thread therefore might not be suitable for certain sensitive users. Please take this into consideration before continuing to read.

My life is crazy. I'm a 15 year old, I work and go to school. Even though its summer, I'm working and going to college at the same time. The stress is just overwhelming. I am under medz that are suppose to help me with the piercing pain i get in my head once in a while. But they are not as efficient as before. The problem here is that I am limited on the way that I can relieve my stress. I have very little free time, and when I have it, I wish I could go out with friends. But my parents dont allow me to do so many things. Just about six months ago, my older brother died and its still hard on the family. His death was sudden, and it got me thinking. What would happen if i died tonight, I wouldnt have lived my life. You know how they call teen years the golden years, well i'm not having any fun. I'm more of an adult than my 22 year old sister! Its ridiculous! I just dont feel like i'm living my life, and its killing me emotionally and it is getting so out of hand that its causing physical effects. Now because of all the problems, i have found myself more than once thinking about, how would it be if i were dead? i dont mean i dont think in killing myself, but i imagine how things would be. What really has me nervous is the fact that I have recently found myself needing a brake from EVERYTHING, including life. So, I need help.

last time i tried talking to someone about this, all they said was, stay strong, you can do it.... so another problem is that when i really do need advice, i'm told that i can do it alone. how the hell is that suppose to help? but i dont know what to do anymore. right now i'm stressed because of everything. i have a feeling that if i continue like this, i'm not going to last. ha! and the worst thing is that i cant find much support in my home or in school. its because everyone has this mentality of me being a great person with a great life. no one can imagine that i'm just dying. in school, how can i, staight A student, ranked number 1, social activist, popular kid, have a hard life like i do? its not possible; to THEM! so as you can see, i'm just tiered. and every time i see a movie of kids just going off and having fun, i feel just horrible to know that i cant have a good life, a life i can actually enjoy.
  (#2 (permalink)) Old
Mikey09 Offline
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Re: Need help - July 19th 2009, 03:03 PM

Hey there dude, Your 15 and you do all of this? thats crazy like you say.

You really NEED to make some time for yourself, even if your sitting down and relaxing. Everyone needs some time to thereself otherwise it will make them crazy. Alot is happening for you right now and you might feel stuck, well you always have a choice. Its Your life at the end of the day and whatever you want can happen you just need to stick at it.

Try and do more things that make you happy in your free time that You will make. Remember that your only 15, the start of your life is whenever you want it to, I never had much of a child hood or anything but ill make up for that in the future. Its up to ourselfs to do these things, other people can just offer a push to help.

I know im not much help but other people will help you dont worry everyone is here to help.
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  (#3 (permalink)) Old
savealife723 Offline
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Re: Need help - July 20th 2009, 12:02 AM

woah, you are inspiring if you all that at that age.
i don't know how to help you much, and i'm sorry for that.
but i just wanted to wish you the best luck.
feel free to pm me anytime.
and i am very sorry about your loss. /:
i bet he's watching over you though,
keeping you safe.

When you can't find your way home,
and when life gets too hard to face on your own.
I will stand as a light through the darkness unknown,
I will walk with you, so you're never alone.
  (#4 (permalink)) Old
Nicolette Offline
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Re: Need help - July 20th 2009, 12:43 AM

Whoah sounds like you're in need of a vacation, not a break from life. Is there anyway that you can book some time off work and just take some you time, or really sit down and talk to your parents and tell them that you feel like you're being robbed of your summer and need some you time because you're burning the candle at both ends.

"When it comes down to it I let them think what they want, if they care enough to bother with what I do then I'm already better than them." Marilyn Monroe.
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  (#5 (permalink)) Old
Palmolive Offline
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Jeez, get a life!
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Re: Need help - July 20th 2009, 01:59 PM

Hey there
You do do a lot, and thats really good. However, maybe if there is to much, you need to let some of this stuff go? You sound like a really nice person, and i would hate to think that you would do anything 'silly'. You are only 15, and you do have your whole life ahead of you. you are not on your own. All of us (amazing ) lot are here to support you when ever you need, and we will try our best to help you through what you are going through. I nearly lost my sister once, and it killed me inside to know what could have happend, so i honestly cant imagine what you have to to go through with losing your brother. But you, are still here, still getting through every day of life, and this is something amazing. Have you asked someone at home or att school for help? Mayve you could talk to a teacher for some support? Do try take some you time, get relaxed and do something you enjoy doing. Maybe listen to music, do some art, read, take a bath, go running or swimming, go climb a mountain go and into the middle of the field and scream. Anything to make you feel better okay.
Im always here. Feel free to PM me anytime. Take care love,
Jess <3

"Only in the dark, can you see the stars..."
Josie 12/3/2014, always in my heart. Sue 19/2/2016; Peter, Ellie, Hannah, Andy, Kirtsie RIP.

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  (#6 (permalink)) Old
lilangel! Offline
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Re: Need help - July 20th 2009, 02:55 PM

first of all, let me say how deeply sorry i am for your loss. im sure your brother is watching over you wishing he was here to help.
maybe you should take a few days off from work and just relax, go for a walk, read, watch tv, sleep.
maybe you should talk to your doctor, firstly you should talk about how you dont feel your tablets are working as well as they used to. and then if you feel confident enough, you could discuss your feelings. he/she may be able to refer you to a psychologist or therapist just so you have someone you feel you can talk to in confidence.
at 15, you shouldnt be worrying about these things, you should be enjoying life!!
i think you should talk to your parents, or your sister about whats going on. maybe they can help or make sure you have some alone time.
its understandable that you feel like you need a break from life, but maybe trying to think of a few good things about your life each morning and saying them to the mirror.
i hope ive helped, feel free to PM me anytime if i can help anymore. if not, im here to listen to you whenever you need
stay strong hun, you can get through this
Hannah x

"He who does not weep, does not see" - Les Miserables.

keep reaching and living your lives. you are who you are.

PM me whenever and ill do my best to help!

Im here if you ever need anyone to talk to or to have someone to listen to you
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depressed, lonely, suicidal (idk), tiered

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