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  (#1 (permalink)) Old
Razek Offline
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Name: Blake
Age: 28
Gender: Male
Location: St. Catharines, Ontario

Posts: 20
Join Date: February 10th 2009

Lost, its hide and seek - July 24th 2009, 03:34 AM

I'm lost in my own mind, the shroud of reality is thin and fragile.
My own world in my mind the one that only exist to me. My happiness
changes to despair, changes too rapidly for to little, and the other way
around. I don't deserve love, not what i've had, not even love to be.
I am a burden to all i care, and i wish them no pain. I am the pain that i
have, and will not share it. I know i will only feel this way tonight or maybe
tomorrow and then ill be back to happy me. Happiness that now seems a
web of lies to catch and ensnare to bring down everyone with me. i could go
back to the blade to even myself out... i just don't know anymore... maybe i never knew...
  (#2 (permalink)) Old
Darrenboy! Offline
my long tongue is long.
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Age: 42
Location: MARS! :D

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Join Date: January 5th 2009

Re: Lost, its hide and seek - July 24th 2009, 11:42 AM

hey blake.

i understand that you're going through a lot. but those people who care for you and help you do so because they take your own happiness as theirs, and they want to share it so as to make you happy too. The same holds true for when you're sad, because they will want to share your paint and lighten it as much as possible.. because nothing is more important to them than seeing that smile on your face

and you are NOT a burden, i bet that you helped people out a lot too, and you need to remember EVERYONE has the right to be helped especially when they're going through a lot (and your situation definitely qualifies as a lot ) .

manly hugs. and always remember that everything will eventually turn around and and take a turn for the better.

take care!

Those who have went through more pain than everyone else, and want to protect anyone and everyone they know and care for from that pain, are stronger than everyone.

we come, we help, we stick and never leave. pm me anytimeee!

Official member of the completely Unofficial free hugs Club !

I'm firing mah Hugs!
  (#3 (permalink)) Old
CherriesBlossom Offline
I've been here a while
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Name: Katie
Age: 30
Gender: Female

Posts: 1,054
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Join Date: January 13th 2009

Re: Lost, its hide and seek - July 24th 2009, 03:29 PM

hey blake.

you are NOT a burden and you deserve to have amazing things in life such as: love ..happiness ect.

i understand how your mind can suddenly switch you emotions on you, going form happy to depressed in no time flat, my mind does that to me and it gets hard sometimes.

is there anything in particular that makes you feel depressed to get you to that state?

just from this post i cant tell your intellegent and have alot going for you. you have an amazing gift for words and they way that you write out your emotions. right now even though it might seem hard focus on the things that make you happy, activites, anything.

you will get through this i promise.
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Prozac Offline
I can't get enough
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Re: Lost, its hide and seek - July 24th 2009, 04:56 PM

Hey there Blake,

It sounds like you’re feeling pretty confused right now. Your mood swings seem to be causing you quite a lot of distress.

I know how it feels to be ‘lost in my own mind’ – I’m sure that a lot of people who suffer from depression or other mental illness feel the same way sometimes. It is easy for your mind to be pulled in by negativity and all of a sudden you seem to have this negativity channelled into everything and it’s all that you can focus on. It’s not nice and it is very hard to come out of. If you do notice yourself thinking something negative then try and balance it out and challenge your thoughts to find something positive. Try to get out with some friends or do something you like to do – watch a cartoon or something that’s not going to have any negativity in or that are going to trigger you – do something completely different – something distracting.

I am glad that you know that these negative feelings aren't permanent - that's really wonderful and such a positive thought to have in the back of your mind. What makes you happy, Blake? Maybe you could try figuring out what does make you happy when you're feeling a little more stable and happier. Make a list of things that you enjoy, things that make you happy. Embrace that time - don't think about feeling upset again, enjoy that you're happy then.

You do deserve love and you’re not a burden. Start thinking positive thoughts, Blake! Why wouldn’t you deserve love? I think everyone does need love and care in order to have a good mental wellbeing so try and embrace the thought that people do love you and are giving you love – not that you don’t deserve it. You’re not a burden either, you have a problem and you’re feeling upset – that doesn’t mean you’re a burden, it means that you’re struggling. Everyone needs help at sometime or another. I’m sure that people don’t think you’re a burden, they would be happy to know that you’re asking for help.

It’s really great that you’re asking for help here, Blake – have you tried talking to anyone offline about how you’re feeling? It would be a good idea to try and talk to a relative or an adult you trust about how you’re feeling – it could really help you. Talking to a doctor may also be useful if you're suffering from these rapid mood swings - they could help you try and stabilize your mood. It’s great that you’re managing to type out your feelings, keeping a blog or a journal could also give you some relief. You should be proud of yourself for talking to us and reaching out.

Take care.
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