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  (#1 (permalink)) Old
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Name: Charlie
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I'm sick of it. - August 1st 2009, 02:32 PM

It feels like my heart is about to beat out of my chest in the worse way possible. I'm sick of trying to be there for people just for them to push me away but if I don't bother, they'll get annoyed at me. I'm sick of feeling so unwanted and unloved and putting effort into what's turning into nothing. I'm sick of people snapping at me for nothing and just laughing at me all the time. I'm sick of being bought down by the one I least expected to do it and no-one being there to cheer me up and I'm really sick of crying and feeling this way.

I hate having to worry about everything, having to watch what I do and say and having to tip-toe around some people and I hate being here because I can't handle any of this, it just feels like a feather is the weight of the world and it's all on my shoulders and I just can't deal with that because I'm trying to keep everything together but it's just falling apart quicker then I can keep it together and my effort just seems to go unnoticed and as I said, being put into nothing. I just want things to be fine again but I know that that's just a dream and I'm asking too much.

I don't know what to do and it feels like no-one understands.
   
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Re: I'm sick of it. - August 1st 2009, 03:33 PM

Hey Charlie.

I am so sorry that you are feeling like this at the moment. I suppose it can be hard for someone to understand exactly what it feels like for someone else but that doesn't mean to say that people can't try to understand. You just have to give people that chance to try.

You said you want things to be fine again, which suggests to me that things have been fine at one point. Do you know what changed for things not to be fine? Perhaps if you are able to think about what made things ok before you might be able to see what you can do to make things good again.

If people push you away when you try to be there for them then that isn't your fault. I think you are a great friend to be there for them and if they push you away then at least you tried. People who make you feel unwanted and unloved are not worth it. You are worth it so don't let these people get to you.

Is there anything at all that makes you feel a bit better? If so perhaps you could try doing that.

If you need anything at all then I am always here
   
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Re: I'm sick of it. - August 1st 2009, 03:53 PM

Yeah, they were fine at one point but now I don't know if they were fine because people made it seem that way or whether they generally were and I don't know what I did to make it fine or how to fix everything that's changed it all. I feel like no matter what I do, it doesn't make things better, just worse and I'm running out of ideas.

And I guess so but at the same time, I really want to be there for them because I care a lot and I don't want them to be dealing with stuff on their own if someone is there to help but I guess I just need to learn when to leave people alone which is something I'm not good at.

I'll try and find something to cheer myself up, hopefully it'll work. Thanks for replying.
   
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Re: I'm sick of it. - August 1st 2009, 05:30 PM

Hey Charlie, I Know how you feel.
its not nice when you give and dont get back, i can completely relate to you. if you ever need to talk to anyone, i'll listen, Just Pm Me Or something
xx
Jess
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Re: I'm sick of it. - August 1st 2009, 05:49 PM

i cant do this anymre
   
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Re: I'm sick of it. - August 1st 2009, 05:59 PM

you cant give up charlie
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Re: I'm sick of it. - August 1st 2009, 06:02 PM

I just feel like I haven't got anything to live for anymore though so what would be the point.
   
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Re: I'm sick of it. - August 1st 2009, 07:58 PM

You have your life to look forward to though. I'm feeling the same way as you but you have to keep going, life has its ups and downs.


You were the angel of my life, taught me to be free
Now I'm a stranger in your eyes.
   
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Re: I'm sick of it. - August 1st 2009, 10:43 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by *Faith* View Post
You have your life to look forward to though. I'm feeling the same way as you but you have to keep going, life has its ups and downs.
Faith is completely right Charlie, we all have are moments of depression, sometimes to the point of not wanting to live. But, it's all about persevering.
   
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