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Depression and Suicide If you or a loved one is feeling depressed or suicidal, you are not alone. Talk with other users about your feelings here.

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i wish i knew what to do - August 8th 2009, 06:06 AM

i just want this all to end. i havent felt this bad in a log time. i am just sitting here taking in everything going on. i hate these feelings i wish i could just have no emotion. im tired of learning to trust people and open up to them just to have them turn their backs on me. i hate that im in love with someone i know nothing about and i hate that i will end up hurting them after i promised i wouldnt. i hate not having anyone to go to. i hate that my parents say they love me and say that i can telling them anything when in reality i cant tell them anything because they wouldnt love me anymore. i hate that my entire life is one huge fucking mistake. i hate everything to do with my life. i wish i could be someone else. i wish i could be normal for once in my life. mainly i wish i had the guts to just end this.


...someone asked me if I knew you...
...and a million memories flashed through my mind...
...and I whispered,"not anymore"...

If I could have just one wish, I would wish to wake up everyday to the sound of your breath on my neck, the warmth of your lips on my cheek, the touch of your fingers on my skin, and the feel of your heart beating with mine... Knowing that I could never find that feeling with anyone other than you.
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Re: i wish i knew what to do - August 8th 2009, 06:11 AM

Hey there,

I am sorry to hear that you are struggling so much but please know that things will be okay.

I was wondering why you think talking to your parents would make them not love you anymore? I know talking to people can be really hard but in the end what we tell them usually doesn't make them not love us. Sometimes opening up to people can strengthen the bond you have with them. Do you think you could try talking to your parents?

If you don't feel like you could talk to your parents is there anyone else you could talk to? It really does help to talk to people because it helps us vent all the negative emotions rolling around inside of us.

I want you to know that you do not deserve to feel this way and you can get better. Please hang in there.

If you ever need someone to talk to please feel free to pm me.

~Jenna~


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Re: i wish i knew what to do - August 8th 2009, 06:21 AM

if i tell my parents everything that i really want to tell them i know they wont love me anymore because of the way they treat my friends and other people who are like me


...someone asked me if I knew you...
...and a million memories flashed through my mind...
...and I whispered,"not anymore"...

If I could have just one wish, I would wish to wake up everyday to the sound of your breath on my neck, the warmth of your lips on my cheek, the touch of your fingers on my skin, and the feel of your heart beating with mine... Knowing that I could never find that feeling with anyone other than you.
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Re: i wish i knew what to do - August 8th 2009, 11:26 AM

Hey,

I can understand that fear (and by like you do you mean sad? or something else) but the truth of the matter is that sometimes when people realize their family members are struggling with something their view on it changes. For example an acquaintance of mine struggled with depression and was scared to tell her parents because she felt that they wouldn't accept her anymore etc but once she told them they were pretty understanding. Do you think the same thing could happen with your parents?

If talking to your parents is out of the question is there anyone else you can talk to? If there is no one in your 'real' life that you could talk to then keep coming onto teenhelp and posting threads, using helplink, livehelp, and the chat.

Although these things do not make up for the help your parents could possibly provide you it always helps to have some network of support.

Please hang in there and my pm box is always open.

~Jenna~


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Re: i wish i knew what to do - August 8th 2009, 01:58 PM

Hey there,

I completely agree with Jenna that you should try to talk to your parents. I'm sure they will still love you. It's worth the try to reach out and get the help even if it is hard in the beginning. If you don't feel comfortable talking to your parents, maybe reach out to a close friend or other family member. Just remember that suicide isn't the answer. You have taken the first step in reaching out for help so now just follow through with it. You can do it! I know you can!

PM me if you need anything.

~Alessa


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