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Depression and Suicide If you or a loved one is feeling depressed or suicidal, you are not alone. Talk with other users about your feelings here.

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T_Left_Alone_B Offline
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Suppose to be Alone? - August 8th 2009, 05:18 PM

This thread has been labeled as triggering, particularly on the subject of self harm, by the original poster or by a Moderator. The contents of this thread might therefore not be suitable for certain sensitive users. Please take this into consideration before continuing to read.

I'm alone cause its in my genes. it must be. my friends basically sourrounded me and told me why i'm ugly, and unattractive, and unwanted, and whats wrong with my personality. i went for a walk last night cause i was bored, i was the only person walking by themselves. i even had a chance to go and sit with a girl sitting by herself, i could have gone up to her introduced myself and asked if i could sit with her. but i didn't cause i don't know how. i have NO friends. i have no one to hang out with. i have like 3 friends, and there all on msn. thats it. I'm hating everything now, i don't even care about my goals. i have no reason to actaully get out of bed in the morning if i have a day off. i have a cell phone but no one to txt or call, i have a hotmail, but no one emails me. i'm so alone whats the point of life if you have no one to live it with? to share memories? to even have someone to talk to?
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Re: Suppose to be Alone? - August 9th 2009, 06:48 AM

Everyone feels alone at some time in there life. If your friends are telling you about all those negative things then I don't think they are much of friends.. You just need to get out there and open up to the world a little bit more. If you say your alone already, what do you have to lose? Most people love when someone new comes into their lives, or actually takes the time to get to know them. If I was that girl on the bench I would've loved for you to come sit and talk to me. Just be more outgoing, people do like it alot more than you think Hope I helped. I wish you luck!!
   
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Re: Suppose to be Alone? - August 9th 2009, 02:06 PM

my own friends rejected me, whats going to stop some stranger that doesn't even know me?
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Re: Suppose to be Alone? - August 9th 2009, 03:57 PM

I think someonewithin had a good point. If you already feel alone, what does one random person rejecting you really mean? I'd say it's worth a try. You never know, you might just find that best friend you've been craving so much. Perhaps not on the first attempt, but someone somewhere might need you just as much as you need them.

These "friends" that just strike you down are not friends at all. Do not listen to them. Keep in mind that online friends (such as via msn) may not provide the same things a friend in real life can, but they certainly can be very important people to you. I know that a few of my closest friends are those I have never actually met in person.
   
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Re: Suppose to be Alone? - August 9th 2009, 10:36 PM

i'm not even sure if its worth it anymore, to even get rejected by a stranger will still hurt, and it'll only prove how right my stupid ass friends were. i'm not sure if its worth taking the risk.
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Re: Suppose to be Alone? - August 9th 2009, 11:09 PM

I agree - everyone is alone at some point in their lives... And trust me, I know how it feels. It makes you feel worthless - it makes you feel like maybe there's something wrong with you, which is why you're rejected by so many... But that's certainly not it!

Sometimes it takes a long while to find friends that care about you and love you. Sometimes, it takes a short while. But even so - in the meantime, you need to learn to LOVE TO BE ALONE.

You can do so much when you're alone; read, write, sketch. You can finish projects that you were meaning to work on. I know it hurts, but soon enough, you'll randomly bump into someone, and instantly, you'll click. Let your friends come to you! Lean back, watch the stars, relax - and much quicker than you think, you'll meet someone who was waiting to meet you.
   
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Re: Suppose to be Alone? - August 9th 2009, 11:14 PM

firstly, I think you need a hug. *big loving hug* Hugs make everything better.

i understand hating to be rejected by a stranger. i'm going to a new school next year and really don't want to be rejected.

There is a point to all of this. All of this will make you a stronger person. You'll be so much more aware of people that are lonely, and then you'll welcome new people so that they won't feel alone. (I've seen that change in myself)

This is not the end. This is only the beginning of something that's about to come along. If you've ever seen "the dark knight" you'll recognize this quote- the night is often darkest before the dawn.

For things to get better you have to try. When I go to my new school next year, I'm going to try and talk to people and get out there and know people. If you have a job, try talking to some co-workers that you never talk to. If you're at school, try sitting next to someone new at lunch or in classes.

I hate lonliness. It's the worst feeling in the world. But you know what, life is like running. When running, the road is your trip that you follow, your source of happiness, but also your source of pain. You take what it throws at you (hills, twists, turns, downhills, flat ground) and keep going forward. You can never give up while running, and you can't give up on your life.

I hope that helped in some way. =)
   
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Re: Suppose to be Alone? - August 10th 2009, 03:45 AM

i don't understand how to love to be alone, to wake up alone, to go on msn with no one to talk to, to check your hotmail with nothing in my inbox, i don't smoke, i don't do drugs, and i quit drinking. so the bar scene is really different to me now. i draw here and there but not alot, but i'll have plenty of alone time now since i have a doctors note for two weeks off from work, i've been sick since winter and still have no idea whats wrong with me. so i'll have 2 weeks with no reason to even get up. i like doing physical stuff, but becuse of my sickness i have no energy. i'm just really confused on what i should focus on first. how start this new lonely life.
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Re: Suppose to be Alone? - August 10th 2009, 06:19 AM

If I may suggest, the first thing i did to learn to be alone was head to the library. just load up on a whole bunch of books, and read. Books are amazing in that if they are interesting, they can be like portals to another world. Just because you are alone in this world, doesn't mean you can't enter a new one. A good submersible video game can also do the trick if that is more your speed. If you take on the role of someone else, you can sometimes forget about who you are and why you are so lonely.


"I backed my car into a cop car, the other day.
Well he just drove off, sometimes life's ok.
I ran my mouth off a bit too much, oh what did I say.
Well you just laughed it off, it was all ok.

And we'll all float on, ok."
modest mouse - float on

   
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Re: Suppose to be Alone? - August 10th 2009, 01:46 PM

so to stay at home and play video games and read is suppse to make me feel better?
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Re: Suppose to be Alone? - August 10th 2009, 10:31 PM

Yes and no, in my opinion.

Occupying oneself often helps with pain, but it doesn't necessarily cure it. In the beginning, relief is a great start. But you do need to put some effort into finding new people. Some will come to you, but some need you to go to them. I can guarantee you, without a doubt, there is at minimum one person near you that you can and will find and possibly grow quite attached to. Other friends often branch from that initial friend, and then the web of people you can associate with will continue to grow. It isn't easy to start over, but it certainly can be done. I assure you, if you try you will find someone. No, maybe not on the first try, but keep going. Never stop. In the end, it will be well worth your time and effort.
   
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Re: Suppose to be Alone? - August 11th 2009, 05:08 AM

Hi Desmond,

you mentioned that you like to draw - maybe work on that, some? Just draw for fun, or find a sort of teach-yourself book/site, or maybe spend some of your time while you're sick looking for art classes, where you'd have a chance both to work on developing your skills and to meet people. Or maybe spend some of your time figuring out when in your schedule you could fit in physical stuff. And again, maybe try looking for things you could do in groups - like a rock climbing club, or a hiking organization, or something like that.

Hang in there.


Drown in the music,
dance in the rain,
block out the thunder,
and let the scars fade.
   
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