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so angry - September 27th 2009, 10:36 PM

I feel so angry deep inside. it isn't realy directed at anyone or anything just angry at my life at the past. I have never realy been good at getting emotions out. doing so never realy helped me so I avoided it I guess all this anger is what has built up over the years.

looking back I geuss I have always been realy angry. I look at the walls of my room and I see plases where holes had to be fixed when I punched/stabed the wall

I feel like tearing my room apart I am hoping someone will pick a fight with me so I can go all out on them


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Re: so angry - September 27th 2009, 10:54 PM

I used to have somethin similar. Really intense plain anger, ain't it? In my case it just burned out. Funny that, I would put holes in the wall in my room. It would just be from my fist though, I nearly broke my hand once when I hit a brick instead of plasterboard.

I still get it sometimes, I just need something small to tip the scales and I'll go beserk, I usualy feel it coming, in my stomach. Try just going for a walk at night, or if you have a bicycle, use it.
   
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Re: so angry - September 28th 2009, 12:44 AM

Hey there,

I am angry about a lot of stuff as well. I used to keep that anger in and it was a horrible feeling but then I started letting it out and it really helped. I know that expressing emotions can be really hard but it is the best thing to do. They say that built up anger turns to sadness and that is never a good thing.

What are some ways you have tried to let your anger out? I know that sometimes it can take a few different techniques to figure out what works best. So, keep on trying to find some methods that will allow you to let the emotions out.

I know that for me screaming into a pillow, going for a walk, or punching a pillow/punching bag really helped. If you haven't tried that already you should give it some consideration.

Also, journaling can be really helpful. I know that when you write in a journal you let your emotions out.

Please hang in there and if you need anything feel free to pm me.

Jenna


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Re: so angry - September 28th 2009, 04:53 AM

I'm a lot like that too, though society tells me that I can show it anywhere. So I don't. But that always makes it worse, you know? I can't even punch my wall and when I take my dog out I just feel like breaking the leash on the ground and running away-- but the logic gets me every time. Why run away when I could just stay quiet and docile and live until I can go out on my own. Just be completely alone. Even though that's years from now, just imagining what it would be like is enough to suspend the anger.

But then when my parents ask my why I'm so angry, there are so many things that I can't describe it all and have them understand. It's like a balancing act, but the longer you can hold it together until you do find a way to let it go (I'm still working on that one) the better.

Ahaha it's funny, I always wanted someone to hit me so that I could hit them back too. Destroy them. But I'm a girl, so it never happened. And probably never will. That's just a fact I have to come to terms with. It's like I wanted to see them bleed and me bruise, but my skin stayed immaculate. I guess that's the way it will always be, and despite what I want to say, logic tells me it's for the better.

Basically, think it out logically, most of the time it just does not work in your favor, so why do it? There are plenty of people out there willing to hurt your future, why would you want to be one of them? Hope this helps. It helps me to know that I'm not the only one, it's seemed like that for so long
   
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