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Depression and Suicide If you or a loved one is feeling depressed or suicidal, you are not alone. Talk with other users about your feelings here.

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would anyone notice? - October 17th 2009, 09:39 PM

ive had depression for years now aswell as being suicidal and self-harming but because of my anxiety i find it hard to talk about how i feel and tend to just push people away.
now i think ive pushed them too far, i lie locked in my room for days at a time and nobody bothers to try and see how i am, my friends dont see me as much and hardly get in touch at all, my family dont understand and only talk to me if they want to moan at me for something.
so now im thinking if i follow through and finally die, would anyone notice ? would they be thankful the burden is gone ?
what ever the answer all i know is its best for everyone if im not here
   
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Katrina Offline
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Re: would anyone notice? - October 17th 2009, 11:58 PM

We've been studying Erik H. Erikson is Soshee lately - he's a pretty interesting; he talks of how from age 12-20ish, we go through a stage of identity versus role confusion, I believe it is, and until we figure out who we are, we do push people away and withdraw and go into a period of isolation type deal..so maybe that's one of the goals you could set - setting goals for yourself is a good thing - it gives you something to look forward to and try to achieve. Hope is real; hope is good.

I'm guessing your friends haven't been coming by as much because they're afraid they'll do or say the wrong thing. They want to help, but they don't know how, and they don't want to ask. (Again, just guessing here).. Perhaps you could tell them the best way to help you? Maybe just asking them to come by and sit with you as you try to get through some of your worst points..they don't really have to say anything, but I feel like just being in another person's physical presence would help.

To answer your question, yes..your friends and family would miss you. Immensely. The hurt people feel when they've lost a friend or family member to suicide is probably...nearly unbearable..it's legitimately one of the hardest things to bounce back from, because you most likely don't go a day without asking what you could've done better and why you didn't see it coming. That's a tough thing. I was looking at a memorial page of someone I knew the other day when I stumbled upon a different one..it's heart breaking, what the families go through. :/ Please reach out to your family and friends - I know it may seem tough - depression hurts not only those going through it, but also those around that person, because it's the one thing they can't..fix.

Have you spoken to a professional? I was saying in another thread that there are so many different options for therapy. Some people try therapy, and the first thing they try helps them. Some people, it takes more than one try, but when they do reach that path where they start heading towards recovery, it's so worth it.

Your life matters.



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Re: would anyone notice? - October 28th 2009, 11:36 PM

NO, don't die. Your family most likely loves you, and people WOULD notice.
   
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