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teflon Offline
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Age: 29

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Join Date: January 11th 2010

What is Change? - January 11th 2010, 10:37 PM

I never thought i would be considering suicide and still today, i think i have enough will to hold on. But, i wonder for how long. i went to high school and still was a loser and a loner, thought it happened to people in high school, left town to attend university, thinking everything would change with a new beginning and here now in 2nd year i sit worst off where i see the people having the time of their lives. sitting alone in class, eating alone, watching movies by myself, infact i don't remember having dinner with someone else. i went through the roughest time last year and NO ONE..the people who called their selves a friend never even bothered to ask. Every now and then when someone needs something they call me. i'm constantly depressed and what's point of taking meds which will make you happy while you see yourself still as a loner. i'm starting to develop a hatred towards myself, towards this life. i wish i knew what i did to deserve this and why me. it was in my fate to be a loner and i guess i can't change that and probably live the rest of my life like this.
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Through-Glass Offline
I've been here a while
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Name: Jessi
Age: 27
Gender: Female
Location: Eastern Tennessee

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Join Date: January 7th 2009

Re: What is Change? - January 12th 2010, 07:00 AM

Hey there,

I just want you to know that you will never be truly alone. You have the people in your life who love you, as well as everyone here on TH. We have your back; you can always come to one of us for support, no matter what. <3

Take care, and keep holding on. Things will look up for you soon, I promise. Just keep holding on for tomorrow.

"For the first time
in a long time,
I can say that I wanna try.
I feel helpless for the most part,
but I'm learning to open my eyes.
And the sad truth of the matter is,
I'll never get over it,
but I'm gonna try
to get better and overcome each moment
in my own way"

Motion City Soundtrack, "Even If It Kills Me"
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Spirit. Offline
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Name: Kaveri
Age: 27
Location: India

Posts: 1,422
Blog Entries: 3
Join Date: January 28th 2009

Re: What is Change? - January 12th 2010, 07:19 AM

First off, welcome to TH! Glad to have you aboard! (:

Jessi is right. No one is truly alone! There's always someone caring about you. You just have to notice the hand they hold out to you! We're always here if you want to talk about anything at all!
I'm sorry things aren't really working out for you. I really am. I know how tough it is when you really want someone to talk to or just be with you, and no one realizes, even your very best friends, and it's gets really depressing.
About suicide I can say only one thing, which is something I read a while ago: Death can help you escape from life, but nothing can help you escape from death.
Please don't think of yourself as a loser. I can tell you something. If you look only at the hard parts of your life, or of yourself, then you forget about all the nice things that you are, or that happened. There has to be something that you liked about your life, right?
Life isn't fair...I've heard that so many times from people. But they don't get how much I resent it. Then I think, "Yeah, life's a b***h. I can't do anything about it. But I can change the way I look at it. I can learn from it. I can use it to help me. I can help other people who feel lonely, upset, or whatever, because, now, I understand how they feel. I can look at life in a positive way, and change me!"
I really don't know what else to say!! :P
But, if you would like to just talk, or whatever, please feel free to PM/VM me!
Feel better!

~Through the wind and the rain she stands hard as a stone
In a world that she can't rise above.
But her dreams give her wings and she flies to a place where she's loved.

Concrete Angel

"And so I grew from colt to stallion
As wild and as reckless as thunder over the land.
Racing with the eagle, soaring with the wind.
Flying? There were times I believed I could."

HelpLINK Mentor - 2.4.2011
LiveHelp Operator - 18.6.2011

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