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Depression and Suicide If you or a loved one is feeling depressed or suicidal, you are not alone. Talk with other users about your feelings here.

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  (#1 (permalink)) Old
i_am_me_again Offline
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Feeling Sucidal and Angry - January 12th 2010, 08:15 PM

I phoned the crisis team, told them what i'd done, whats been going on and how I feel, and after about 5 minutes the bloke just told me "ok then. good luck with killing yourself"

So angry I self harmed and was screaming in hysterics.

Might as well kill myself.

Sorry to all


xxx


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  (#2 (permalink)) Old
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Re: Feeling Sucidal and Angry - January 12th 2010, 08:20 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by i_am_me_again View Post
I phoned the crisis team, told them what i'd done, whats been going on and how I feel, and after about 5 minutes the bloke just told me "ok then. good luck with killing yourself"

So angry I self harmed and was screaming in hysterics.

Might as well kill myself.

Sorry to all


xxx
Was this a proffesional suicide hotline? like samaritains??? that is disgusting!!! they can actualy loose there job from reacting like that!. i'm not the best person to talk to about suicide but i do know it's helpful to sleep it off or try do something you love doing! i do thinnk you should complain about what he said to you.
sorry i'm not much help but no one deserves to be spoken to like that! please don't kill yourself,i was in the same position as you a few months ago and i know how you feel,it's like nothing will get through isn't it? no one helps, i know how you feel,it happens with me a lot. but i am so glad i didn't kill myself those few months ago, my life has improved,it's not perfect but it's improved. please don't kill yourself, please
   
  (#3 (permalink)) Old
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Re: Feeling Sucidal and Angry - January 12th 2010, 08:35 PM

It was a proffesional NHS west herts mental health crisis team.

I just want to prove him right....I am strong I can end it....he basically said 'good luck with it'


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  (#4 (permalink)) Old
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Re: Feeling Sucidal and Angry - January 12th 2010, 08:42 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by i_am_me_again View Post
It was a proffesional NHS west herts mental health crisis team.

I just want to prove him right....I am strong I can end it....he basically said 'good luck with it'
you should complain about that!.
no,this man is not important in your life, trust me!.
i'm an ok person,not perfect,but please, prove me right, your strong enough to carry on with your life, no matter how hard it gets you CAN pull through it.yes i don't know you personally but i believe everyone has strentgh within to help themselves. i helped myself,i thought i couldn't. please, prove him wrong, show him you don't have to die.
   
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Re: Feeling Sucidal and Angry - January 12th 2010, 08:53 PM

Hey Jamie,

I seriously think you should report this to your crisis team. There's no reason this guy should have treated you the way that he did, and you don't deserve to be treated that way now or in the future. I would call them back up and tell them what happened so that this man is not able to offend anyone else who may call.

I know that you're struggling right now, but don't let some loser not good enough for his own job make you feel as if you should kill yourself. Not everyone in the world is going to be caring or supportive, but don't let that convince you that no one cares about you or believes in you, because there are so many people in the world who do, including everyone on TH.

The truth is that you're a brave and strong girl, Jamie, and you shouldn't let anyone take control over you and make you feel any differently. If you're feeling suicidal, I'd suggest calling your crisis team again and asking to speak to someone you feel will be more supportive. Either that or you could call a hotline such as Samaritans.

Things may seem tough right now, but try not to forget that they can always get better. I'm here if you ever need me.





A lonely soul in a land of broken hearts


   
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Re: Feeling Sucidal and Angry - January 13th 2010, 12:22 AM

just wanted to encourage you to KEEP REACHING OUT for help to people in your life because it sounds like you may have a mental illness such as Depression. Many Mental illnesses like depression are treatable with medication, therapy, and lifestyle changes such as eating balanced meals and getting enough sleep. It is however very very hard to go it alone. Your life is valuable, and with treatment things CAN get better.

here are a few things that kept me alive:
1 ) sometimes when i feel like people would be better off without me i watch this video http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Uv2DyzhxpA0 its a music video that is about suicide, and has real parents whose kids killed themselves talking about how hard hard losing their children. the video is only a few minutes long and may make you rethink if you believe that your family would quickly move on.
2) if you are at home and are having really strong urges/racing thoughts try filling up a large bucket or bowl with ice water, elet it get really cold for a few minutes, and then stick your face in it as long as you can a few times. it's incredibly hard to think about how much life sucks when your face is in ice water. taking a 3-5 minute cold shower can also have this effect.
3) We all need somebody to lean on. Reach out for help and support from people online, at a hotline, or who you know and trust. If you think it would be a burden, imagine that you had a friend who killed themselves and in the note said they didn't reach out for help to you because they didn't want to "bother" you. asking for help now will be a lot less painful/burdensome on another person than killing yourself would be. if words aren't doing you justice, try art!
4) distrac(hey look a butterfly!)tions. coloring in coloring books. getting out of the house and reading in a coffee shop. playing solitare. masturbating. get creative!
5)sleeping. a lot.
6) relaxing. taking a hot bath. curling up under a blanket. drinking tea. tightening all my muscles and then one by one letting them relax.
-square breathing
take very slow deep breaths. inhale for two counts, then exhale for two counts. as you count inhale one – two, exhale one two picture a side of a blue square forming (or any other calming color) for each count in your mind. so each inhale is two sides of a square, and each exhale istwo sides, creating a full square.
-Visualization.
In this technique, you form mental images to take a visual journey to a peaceful, calming place or situation. Try to use as many senses as you can, including smells, sights, sounds and textures. If you imagine relaxing at the ocean, for instance, think about the warmth of the sun, the sound of crashing waves, the feel of the grains of sand and the smell of salt water. You can also use visualization to imagine yourself doing well in an anxiety provoking situation- a sort of mental rehersal.
7) feeling like i have a purpose. weirdos do great things. most great artists and inventors had some major issues, but they are thought of as major contributors to our society. if you stick around, maybe you would help the world in some way, even if its just by being a kick ass mom, or mentoring a teen who has no one to look up to when you are older.
8) fear of afterlife. mean i think most people who consider suicide are crossing their fingers that your spirit doesn't live on after death.
but there are a lot of people and religions who don't believe that. in a lot of religions that believe in heaven and hell- like christianity- suicide is just as bad as murder and is a ticket to hell. i dont believe in hell, but a lot of people do, so its good to take it into consideration, just in case. people say hell may be a lot of different things- but none of them sound all that fun. and its an eternity of feeling like shit where you cant kill yourself.
some eastern religions believe in incarnation. but that seems risky too. i mean, what if you come back as a child sex slave or something? that would suck.

what i'm getting at here is:
LIFE CAN GET BETTER, BUT DEATH MAY LEAD TO AN ETERNITY OF SUFFERING YOU CANT KILL YOURSELF TO ESCAPE.
9) letting out my emotions. havinga good cry. buying a cheap plate at a thrift store, decorating it to representmy problems and SMASHING it. jumping on bubble wrap. screaming. doing art. writing.
10) picking the lesser of two evils. if it comes down to suicide or another harmful behavior, pick the other harmful behavior that will keep you alive (just dont be mean to anyone else!) cutting, smoking, drinking, starving yourself, sleeping around, maybe not the BEST coping skills. but if your desperate, and it will keep you alive, why not? check out the book "Hello, Cruel World: 101 alternatives to suicide for freaks, teens, and other outlaws" by kate bornstien. she has quite a few unconventional suggestions to staying alive.

the only thing you can count on is change, so why don't you stick around? This too shall pass. Things get better, things get worse, but it won't be this way for ever. Don't be afraid to ask for help. your life is valuable.

You're NOT alone.

Megan



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and all the sciencewe have to offer has failed them,
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  (#7 (permalink)) Old
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Re: Feeling Sucidal and Angry - January 13th 2010, 06:56 PM

Thanks for the replies, thank you for caring and thanks for things to do when i get suicidal. Im feeling much better but in a sad way.

Just thanks to take the time of answering.

P.S - Megan. I do suffer from mental illness, I am on meds. Thank you for the suggestions.


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Re: Feeling Sucidal and Angry - January 13th 2010, 07:00 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by i_am_me_again View Post
Thanks for the replies, thank you for caring and thanks for things to do when i get suicidal. Im feeling much better but in a sad way.

Just thanks to take the time of answering.

P.S - Megan. I do suffer from mental illness, I am on meds. Thank you for the suggestions.
No problem- I do too, so feel free to VM or PM me anytime you need an ear/eye.

Megan



When the patient's body has betrayed them,
and all the sciencewe have to offer has failed them,
when worst-case scenario comes true,
clinging to hope is all we've got left.
-grey's.anatomy-
   
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