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Depression and Suicide If you or a loved one is feeling depressed or suicidal, you are not alone. Talk with other users about your feelings here.

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jbaby2 Offline
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I'm extremely depressed when I get home - January 13th 2010, 04:30 AM

I don't think I'm actually depressed but I'm not sure. Basically, my life was perfect until two summers ago. My parents married for 18 years started fighting and my dad eventually moved out and in with my best friend/her mom 'to be closer to me'. My 18 year old brother started doing heroin and continuously did that for about 6 months. Somewhere in between that, my dad bought a condo and him, my brother and I moved into it. My brother eventually was forced to go to rehab or jail. He went to rehab for 4 months. He's clean and sober now. During this, my dad started dating my best friends mom. He forced me to move into their house about a month ago after I threw a party in our condo. I absolutely hate it. I couldn't be more unhappy here. His girlfriend is a complete bitch and changed him into a psycho. He used to be so cool and fun and nice and now hes strict, rude and careless (he left me alone without groceries or even seeing me in our condo for days on end while he slept over at his girlfriends...even after our house got broken into). Now, I can't stand him at all. He's constantly nagging me, placing ridiculous rules on me and being completely careless about anything I do unless he gets to have authority over it, like me going to a party or sleeping over somewhere (I'm almost 18 and he still needs to call parents to make sure I'm sleeping there?). Now I live here with my dad, his girlfriend/my best friends mom, my best friend, my brother, and my best friends brother. My brother doesn't even have a room, and he sleeps on the couch in the living room every night. My dad doesn't care? Whenever I come home, things are usually civil until my dad asks something ridiculous of me like to help him do something that I have no part of or asks me a question and starts an argument. I have my own room and I spend about 80% of my time in there while I'm 'home'. I don't like any of these people and this has even made me dislike my best friend of 6 years... I get so depressed while I'm here that I turn into this bitter, sad, lonely person and that's not who I am. The past couple of nights I've stayed out at my mom's and my friend's and it was the best thing ever. I never realized how much I hate being here and hate my dad who I used to have such a good relationship with. I want to run away from here. I can't live with my mom for certain reasons that are really long to explain. Plus she has hella cats and I'm super allergic. I go to a therapist every week but she hasn't told me much. I HATE being here. My dad claims to be looking for houses to rent but why would he when he forced me to live with his girlfriend and then just move out again?


Ahhhhhhhh it feels really good to get that out... I still don't even know what to do though. I would love to be out and about alll day but I don't have enough money to constantly be buying gas and I only have a few good friends and they're usually busy with their boyfriends or sports etc. Ahhhh
   
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Johnny Walker Offline
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Re: I'm extremely depressed when I get home - January 13th 2010, 05:06 AM

It sounds to me like ur dad might be a little paranoid because of ur brothers addiction, he probabbly wants to keep tabs on you to make sure you aren't following in his footsteps and getting urself in trouble. You paint two pictures of ur dad. Sometimes he is overbearing and sometimes he doesn't seem to care.

He is probably struggling to come to terms with the fact that u are becoming an adult. He doesn't know whether to baby u or let u be ur own person but don't get me wrong ur dad still has a lot to awnser for (especially the whole dating ur best freinds mom part)

That is just my take on it... any help?


Here we are, trapped in the amber of the moment. There is no why.
Kurt Vonnegut
Be content with what you are, and wish not change; nor dread your last day, nor long for it.
Marcus Aurelius
I may be drunk, Miss, but in the morning I will be sober and you will still be ugly.
Winston Churchill

Last edited by Johnny Walker; January 13th 2010 at 05:13 AM.
   
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asyoulikeit Offline
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Re: I'm extremely depressed when I get home - January 14th 2010, 11:23 PM

Hey,

I'm sorry that your life changed so abruptly and that your entire family's relationships changed as well. Sudden, stressful events (especially a complete overhaul at home like you experienced) can easily lead to depression and might explain your change in moods. It's obvious that you're more comfortable with the people around you who HAVEN'T changed since this whole incident, and that makes sense. If you want to destress without having to use gas, maybe you could talk to your mom about spending more time with her? And if your friends aren't always busy and they know your situation, arrange to be picked up. You can get used to your dad looking over your shoulder even though it's annoying, and as said above he most likely means well. Despite the fact that he's being really immature about it

I'm glad you could get your feelings out on TH, and it's a great start but if you tell some others you trust in your life especially your mom exactly how you feel it will be easier. Not only do you deserve someone to talk to (or someone to call when your dad leaves you in a dangerous situation) maybe you could benefit from therapy. Parents separating often affects the entire family and you should build up your support system as much as you can. Eventually, maybe talk to your dad face to face- he needs to treat you as an adult as you become one.

Hope this helped a little, PM me if you want to talk. Take care!

-m


When you say "never", I'll say "lie"
When you say "always", I'll say "true"
When you say "love", I'll say "you"
I'll say "you"

It gets better.
   
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