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  (#1 (permalink)) Old
Palmolive Offline
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Jeez, get a life!
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Is it time to let go yet? - January 18th 2010, 05:03 PM

This thread has been labeled as triggering, particularly on the subject of suicide, by the original poster or by a Moderator. The contents of this thread therefore might not be suitable for certain sensitive users. Please take this into consideration before continuing to read.

I need help. Because im fucking up and i cant handle the pain.
My self harm is out of control, and i totally regret handing the pills in to my teacdher last week. The voices are back again, and ive seen 'him' around a few times.

Ive come to a conclusion.
Buy pills and booze and top myself tomorrow.
Or go to my teacher tomorrow and tell her everything.
I know which i should do, but i also know which i want to. Im not stupid. I Know from past experience how dangerous overdoses are, but right now, i want to feel so much pain, that i die.

Because im falling down, and i can not do this. Im ridiculously suicidal, and i cant handle myself.

Im losing control. Dont know who i am. Scared of myself. Dont trust myself..

Help me?

"Only in the dark, can you see the stars..."
Josie 12/3/2014, always in my heart. Sue 19/2/2016; Peter, Ellie, Hannah, Andy, Kirtsie RIP.

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  (#2 (permalink)) Old
Crescendo Offline
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Re: Is it time to let go yet? - January 18th 2010, 05:08 PM

just wanted to encourage you to reach out for help to people in your life like your teacher because it sounds like you may have a mental illness. Many Mental illnesses are treatable with medication, therapy, and lifestyle changes such as eating balanced meals and getting enough sleep. It is however very very hard to go it alone. Your life is valuable, and with treatment things CAN get better.

It sounds like you're not totally sure you want to die. hold on to that little spark inside you that wants to live, and try to tell your teacher. It sounds like you're dealing with a LOT and she can help you get the help you need and deserve.

the only thing you can count on is change, so why don't you stick around? This too shall pass. Things get better, things get worse, but it won't be this way for ever. Don't be afraid to ask for help. your life is valuable.

You're NOT alone.


When the patient's body has betrayed them,
and all the sciencewe have to offer has failed them,
when worst-case scenario comes true,
clinging to hope is all we've got left.
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Ryan1 Offline
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Re: Is it time to let go yet? - January 19th 2010, 01:40 AM

Jessica – Slow down, don’t get all worked up. You’ve got to think straight on this one. You only get 1 life, it never comes back and it never slows down for you. No matter which path it takes you down you’ll always find hardships.

You need to keep your chin up – Suicide is not an option for the strong hearted. I don’t know what it is that’s troubling you although I can only imagine what you’re going though. You need to see the big picture; your only 15 you’ve got tons of life left in you and sadly you’re not making the best of it. You need to tell your teacher what’s on your mind, only then can you start the healing process.

I wish you all the best!
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claire.ellen Offline
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Re: Is it time to let go yet? - January 19th 2010, 03:24 AM

i have been where you are now. and i can honestly say i got through it. telling someone is the hardest thing to do, but it is such a relief to know you dont have to deal with it just by yourself anymore.

noone can tell you what to do, but i have been there many times throughout the past 5 years and you can get through it! stay positive as hard as i know it is. you can get through this. you will get through this, if you just reach out to someone.

remember: when youve hit rock bottom and your laying on the floor looking up - up is the only way to go. you cant get any worse than what you feel at your worst.
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Jacksonian Offline
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Re: Is it time to let go yet? - January 22nd 2010, 03:15 AM

Go to your teacher, talk to someone. You need to talk, because it seems you are bottling up everything and the pressure is building and you are about to reach a breaking point. Talk to someone.

And also, do your best to maintain self control. Don't let those thoughts control you or make you do anything bad. If you know the right thing to do then do that and do your best to do the right thing.

Last edited by Jacksonian; January 22nd 2010 at 03:16 AM. Reason: Addition
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