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Depression and Suicide If you or a loved one is feeling depressed or suicidal, you are not alone. Talk with other users about your feelings here.

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Depressed :\ - February 26th 2010, 09:34 AM

This thread has been labeled as triggering by the original poster or by a Moderator. Please take this into consideration before continuing to read.

I had another thread but it got closed after the 2 week date. anyway, I'd been feeling so down and depressed, I felt like I'd never be happy, but then I met this guy and we basically clicked instantly.

He's pretty much the most amazing guy ever and I talk to him every morning on my school bus. But I feel like, without him I get depressed again. Like in the holidays, about a week after I met him, i stayed at my best friends house for 3 days & i couldnt talk to him, and when I was at my best friends house, I started slowly feeling depressed again.

I feel kinda pathetic because it's like he's the only thing that can keep me happy.
   
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Re: Depressed :\ - February 26th 2010, 11:04 AM

you know what, you shouldn't make being with someone your main priority. You mess up when you put your all into a person because when they let you down you feel miserable as if you have nothing left. Most importanly,LOVE YOURSELF. You should love yourself just as much as you love that other person. Remember that you are important and have other things that make you happy as well. Don't rely on a man to make you happy.
   
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Re: Depressed :\ - February 26th 2010, 03:46 PM

Hey,

I think it is great that you have someone in your life that makes you happy and I truly believe that having people in life that care about you is something that can always help with depression. However, these people should not effect the way you feel on a daily basis.

Having people there to support you is always a good thing but at the same time you need to be able to be happy on your own. You know? The thing is that if other people are the only reason you are happy then things have a very good likelihood of falling apart. See, people are always going to disappoint us in some way. Most of the time it is not on purpose but it is going to happen. If you rely solely on them to make you happy when the disappointment happens you are going to feel alone.

Having people in your life is definitely important but you need to come to love and find happiness outside of friendships. This can be a hard thing to do but it is possible. You need to love yourself and realize that there are millions of reasons to be happy. Millions of reasons to keep on believing that things will get better.

I think one thing that has helped me come to love myself is journaling/blogging. When I do this I pick apart all the lies my mind is telling my and I insert the truths. Things like "I am worthy and good". With time you really will come to believe it. Do you think journaling could help you?

Please hang in there and if you ever need to talk feel free to pm me.

Jenna


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Re: Depressed :\ - February 26th 2010, 09:29 PM

Hey there Emily,

I'm sorry you are feeling like this, no one should ever have to feel like this.

I agree with what Jenna said though. Having someone in your life who you trust and value and who values you in return can be a great thing in overcoming depression. But becoming overly reliant on this one person can cause trouble. What happens if he suddenly leaves, for whatever reason? You will be stranded and sink further down again unfortunately.

You are an amazing person, who is worth so much to so many different people. But you need to realise that yourself. As Jenna said, try blogging or journalling. Another thing to do is write a list of 5 positive things about yourself (you could have others help in this if you need it) and read it out loud to yourself every morning, evening and whenever you start to feel depressed again. Hopefully that will help reaffirm how much you are worth to people and what an amazing person you are.

Keep talking to him though, if you think it will help you. But try other things and don't solely rely on him to be there and make you happy.

PM me if you ever need to chat,
Take care.
Anna
   
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Re: Depressed :\ - February 26th 2010, 09:35 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by kim700 View Post
you know what, you shouldn't make being with someone your main priority. You mess up when you put your all into a person because when they let you down you feel miserable as if you have nothing left. Most importanly,LOVE YOURSELF. You should love yourself just as much as you love that other person. Remember that you are important and have other things that make you happy as well. Don't rely on a man to make you happy.
I'm not together/in a relationship with him though.
   
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Re: Depressed :\ - February 27th 2010, 09:57 AM

Yea I understand what you are saying Emily, but you are kinda in a dangerous position at the moment. If something happens and you are thrown out on your own, you are going to need something more than him.

Have you got a counsellor/therapist? I think it would be worth you trying to talk to someone about how you feel - as in the depression. That way you can get long lasting help that will help you all through your future.

Take care.
Anna
   
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Re: Depressed :\ - February 27th 2010, 10:20 PM

No, I don't have a counsellor or therapist & I don't really intend on having one. I've had one before and I felt so uncomfortable.
   
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Re: Depressed :\ - February 28th 2010, 12:38 AM

Hey Emily,
I think you should try again talking to a therapist. It's definately worth it having someone to talk to rather then keeping everything inside. Although you felt uncomfortable in the past with your therapist, that just means that person wasn't right for you. There are so many more out there and you just have to keep looking until you find someone you feel comfortable with. It's ok to try new things. It's a good thing.
Hang in there,

Alessa


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Re: Depressed :\ - February 28th 2010, 01:39 PM

I agree with Alessa, for it to be comfortable and work you need to have the right person. Sometimes you have to try more than one to find a "perfect match". I think it would be useful for you.

Here for you whenever.
Take care.
Anna
   
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Re: Depressed :\ - March 2nd 2010, 01:13 PM

oh ok,but still don't rely too much on a person as the on thing that brings light to your day. Friend or boyfriend...still have other things that truly make you happy .
   
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Re: Depressed :\ - March 2nd 2010, 02:05 PM

I think it's great that you found someone that'll make you happy. . But you gotta be careful especially with just a friend. Do they know that they mean this much to you? In my pinion you should surround yourself with friends and family that make you happy
that way it's not all depended on one person. Hope things go well!
   
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