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no reason - March 1st 2010, 09:35 PM

This thread has been labeled as triggering by the original poster or by a Moderator. Please take this into consideration before continuing to read.

Ok so i have only cut once in the last 17 days, but every day i want to cut. Nothing even has to go wrong. I just think about it 24/7 and im not satisfied unless i do it. I am trying to stop but wanted to cut all the time isnt helping. Like honeslty if this is going to be how it is all the time why do i torture myself by not satisfying the "craving." I think about it when im at school, when i play volleyball, or when im with my family. (some what because im afraid someone is going to see the scars because it is a secret to everyone except 2 people i know) But how do i get past the point of not needing a trigger to cut. or how do i get past the point of seeing the scars and thinking of what it looked like before it healed, triggers me. (if that makes sense) all i want to see is the red dripping down my arm. i dont want to have that urge anymore. sometimes i just want to end everything.


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Re: no reason - March 1st 2010, 10:05 PM

Have you tried the Alternatives thread? There are Alternatives covering various reasons people would Self-Harm, including the feeling of wanting to see blood.

Perhaps taking a look at the alternatives could help you?
   
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