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SessyRocks Offline
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Name: April
Age: 30
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I'm giving up - March 2nd 2010, 04:33 AM

I can't feel anymore. It's odd for me to be this way, despite just having a fight with my mom I don't feel anger or sadness...I feel nothing. Nothing at all. I was supposed to go sign up with a trade school today, a paid college. But before that my mom had to tell me that I can't do it, that I need to think about it, I have anxiety so I can't do it and stuff like that. I know I have anxiety, but I was trying not to focus on that. I just wanted to sign up for school...I was tired of not doing anything. But after she put those doubts in my head...I am not sure of anything anymore. I don't know if I want to sign up with a paid college. I thought about going to the adult school but what if I can't find a job? The paid college claims to help you find a job after finishing. But my mom said she had to "make me face reality" by making me doubt my ability to go to school. We have been fighting all day. She has reminded me that I am useless, that I am not normal. She went so far as to call me a bum. I give up. I can't feel anymore. No one wants to support me emotionally...no one wants to help...no one cares how hard it is living with the anxiety and depression. So I just give up.



"To obtain this in exchange for Rin's life...it means nothing!!"-Sesshoumaru



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kim700 Offline
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Re: I'm giving up - March 2nd 2010, 01:24 PM

Don't let anybody...Even if its your own parents..tell you that you can;t do something and that your not worth it ..believe in yourself...and keep striving then just go for it. You can go to any college you want and do anything you want to if you just believe in yourself.Faith is so important in every way. Don't be depressed trials only last for a little while. Be strong and do the best you can. Don't ever give up!! when you give up you give in to being nothing and letting all the negative things that was said being true. Don't ever let any of the negative things thought and said about you be true,and most importantly don't let them come out your own mouth. Always think positive no matter what.God can support you emotionally if you pray to him and believe. when you have depression it is important to have a good spiritual relationship with God. loving yourself more can ease depression too. God-bless!!

Last edited by kim700; March 2nd 2010 at 01:32 PM.
   
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Re: I'm giving up - March 2nd 2010, 07:30 PM

April,
There are people that care about you. Just because you fight with your mom doesn't mean she doesn't love you. We care about you! I completely understand how hard it is living with anxiety and depression. Things seem almost impossible when others can easily just do them. But, don't let this take over. These things can be fixed and you can feel better! No need to give up, you are stronger than that. Yes I understand how when your mom puts the doubt in your head, there's no easy way to get it out of there. But go sign up anyway. It's worth it. For me, it helps me if I'm trying something new, to visit that place beforehand. Meet the teachers, learn your way around the school, find out who to talk to if you needed someone, etc. Once you have the basics down, it's so much easier to deal with your anxiety! It's going to be hard, but things always get a little worse before they get a lot better. Try to sit down and talk with your mom about what works best for you. Tell her she needs to encourage you rather than doubt you. Let her know EXACTLY how you are feeling. You aren't useless at all. What is normal? There is no normal. Everyone is different and everyone has problems in their lives. But that's what makes us stronger. Don't hesitate to PM me if you want to talk.
Hang in there,

Alessa


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