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Depression and Suicide If you or a loved one is feeling depressed or suicidal, you are not alone. Talk with other users about your feelings here.

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  (#1 (permalink)) Old
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Angry faking depression - April 10th 2010, 11:22 PM

I have depression, and all my friends are trying to be depressed because they think its "cool". They think that if they say they are depressed...then "BAM" they are depressed. They only reason they like to act depressed is because they want to be emo. Its just makes me sick... i mean i would give anything....ANYTHING...not to be depressed and sad all the time...and they want to play depression...just because they think its cool?? does anyone understand what i mean?


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  (#2 (permalink)) Old
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Re: faking depression - April 11th 2010, 12:03 AM

It's just what's in at the moment. I understand why it would bother you. If it upsets you a great deal then talk to them. Hell, you might find out more than y ou'd care to know.

Peopel with depression just have it 'easier' people think. They get help, even if they don't want it, and.. well, I dunno, I can just understand that some people who feel a little sad might play it up because of the attention it gets them.

I look at these forums and I think ' how many of these kids really know the soul crushing hopelessness of depression?' I could be completely wrong, but since mental illness is the flavour of the week right now it pays to be wary. You neverf know if your friend who got raped was just a happy little attention whore who made a drunken mistake.

I don't want to be a buzzkill, but.. well I dunno. I've rambled enough. Take care and just don't get too angry that some kids with invisibility issues make a big deal out of their latest breakup.
   
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Re: faking depression - April 11th 2010, 12:51 AM

hey Renee
I understand the way your feeling towards your friends and yes they may be playing up the way they feel but some may have an underlying reason to play it up whether it be for attention or because they want someone to ask how they are feeling if you dont want to talk to them about it then the only thing i could suggest would be to wait it out. if they are good friends then you dont want to push them away but if they are just people that come and go from your life then you might want to confront them explain the way it makes you feel when they act this way but if they are making things worse for you or making your deppression worse then i would really consider saying it to them.
stay strong hun if they are just going through a phase it will pass if you need to talk dont hesitate to pm me x


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Re: faking depression - April 11th 2010, 01:19 AM

Hey Renee,

It must be hard having people not understand how you are feeling and have these feelings taken trivially.

I think that the best thing is to try to educate your friends about depression. Give them websites, show them videos on YouTube. It may be hard to educate because some people don't see the deeper meaning of depression other than the external feelings. What are the reasons behind their link to "emo" and depression? Perhaps you could find out their reasons, and tell them that depression isn't just a fad lifestyle and that for some it is a serious medical condition. I do have understanding of what you mean. Depression really is hard to measure from person to person, but that doesn't mean it should be taken trivially because it definitely is more serious in some cases than it is in others.

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Re: faking depression - April 11th 2010, 01:49 AM

Various mental illnesses become more "popular" at certain points in time. Currently, it's depression and autism. Before, it was bipolar disorder and ADHD. Since it's not possible for the number of people with clinical depression to double and triple in the span of five years, I have to conclude that people are, in fact, taking the label of "mental illness" far too lightly.

Are you familiar with the DSM? It's a way for psychological professionals to diagnose their patients with various mental illnesses. You are probably also familiar with anti-depressants, and the purpose they serve in altering your brain's chemical imbalance. One way to take the fun out of your friends' "game" is to give them the cold facts about depression. Everyone gets sad about things. Everyone suffers from periods of sadness. But depression is something far, far more serious than simply being "sad"... and it's absolutely wrong for your friends to make light of your mental illness.

If they can't respect you by taking your feelings into consideration, then frankly, it may be best to start looking for a new group of friends. It can be hard to find a nice, healthy, mature group of teenage friends... but if you look long enough and hard enough, I think you'll be successful. =) You seem like a very sensible and compassionate person, and I would LOVE to know you in real life.






   
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Re: faking depression - April 11th 2010, 02:03 AM

Ugh, I know what you mean!
I HATE it when my friends do that!
Ugh and one day, I was so, depressed and pissed at the same time and I was just ranting and my friends just pretend to act depressed and everything and I just told them to shut the fuck up, that they didn't know fuck about how dealing with this is no joke and then one of my friends is like "yep, your goth, not emo. I'd be breaking down now." and i go "So? I don't give a fuck if I'm emo, goth, or whatever! just because you started the emo trend with us doesn't mean your the supreme emo overlord who can say if I'm depressed or not!"
I know how it's like to hate this and everything, but just stay away from those friends or make new friends. That's what I did. They still bother me but not as much.


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  (#7 (permalink)) Old
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Re: faking depression - April 11th 2010, 03:56 AM

I've had this happen. I have seen people trying too hard to fit into a social group, like "Goth", "Emo", or "Punk", assuming mental illnesses and certain actions, topped with the fashion, will make them such.

For example... I had a friend, who was into Punk music and Punk style. She told me that her dad abused her, but then, even though she doesn't live with him anymore, she WILLINGLY goes over, sleeps over, drinks with him, etc. It's annoying, but not the biggest annoyance.
Then, when my one friend (who has BP2 and BPD) said I've probably got them, and I had been discussing such with a different friend, this friend heard, and she starts saying "I have Depression, Bipolar, ADHD, Borderline Personality Disorder, and OCD".
First off...
- Depression and Bipolar CAN'T go together, they contradict. And she has neither, or else she would've been medicated. And I know this for a fact, because that brings me to my next point...
- She doesn't have ADHD. She pretended to have such to be prescribed medication to get high. She's snorted Ritalin recreationally, and when she realized the Concerta didn't crush up, she stopped taking it. But to go with the point above, if she had Depression and Bipolar, and they thought there was a chance of ADHD, I'd think they'd put her on Depression or Bipolar Medication, since she was apparently diagnosed with such, and symptoms of both can cross over with ADHD.
- She definitely does not have BPD or OCD. NO symptoms of either. Hell, I bet she couldn't even begin to tell ANYTHING about such!

I'm pretty sure shes claimed these things to live up to the "Angsty Punk" stereotype, since apparently to be "Punk", you have to have issues.

So yes, I know exactly how you feel about that. I may (long story as to my uncertainty, explained before) have a couple of problems that this friend FAKES, tells people she HAS, and pretty much uses as an excuse to be a bitch to people. I don't LIKE even having issues that'd make me a candidate to possibly have these issues, and she GLORIFIES it. >_<
   
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Re: faking depression - April 15th 2010, 11:26 PM

I keep seeing people who are saying that the population can't all be depressed. I sometimes think I'm not, but then I have a really awful day or so and promise myself I'll never forget how bad it is.
Everyone else is saying this, but stay strong!
As for your friends, tell them how you feel about them acting depressed. Y'know, most emo kids aren't, and don't act depressed. I know a lot of kids who dress in that style and aren't the least bit depressed.
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Re: faking depression - April 16th 2010, 04:48 AM

I absolutly agree with you on this one. This gets on my nerves so much. If only they knew what it was truly like they would not think its so cool. Its not cool its hell! Hate it when people call those who truly are depressed EMO and they say ohh there just faking it. This whole Emo movement is the biggest bullshit i have ever seen. I think this makes bullying so much worse too. Cuz if a person rly is depressed and is picked on cuz they are EMO then its only going to make it so much worse.

I rly do feel sorry for the people who have to go to school in these times. I hope the Emo thing passes soon. It a huge slap in the face to those who are truly depressed.



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Re: faking depression - April 16th 2010, 04:57 AM

Jeez, I know what you mean. People try to be depressed at my school too and its mean to see them do that because of the other people that ACUTALLY have it and that are. It really makes me uncomfable also because depression, bipolar, etc makes life diffucult actually. It's no good day in the park. Depression shouldn't be for attention or popularity and all that crap.



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Re: faking depression - April 16th 2010, 05:51 AM

Its just plain wrong if you ask me. Cuz Tokio is right it is not walk in the park. Its absolute hell! There is nothing cool about it. There is nothing cool about suffering. This Emo stereo type makes me sick.



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Re: faking depression - April 16th 2010, 04:28 PM

I know exactly what you mean.

This is one of the reasons I keep quiet about it. Nobody at school/at home seems to understand what it's like to be depressed. They throw the word around so callously, as though it's just another emotion. And then there are the people who pretend, and do it for attention etc. I just ignore them or try to talk some sense into them if I can, but it doesn't help me much. It's just so frustrating. I'm terrified that, should I seek help, people are going to think that I'm pretending too when all I want is for things to get back to normal.


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Re: faking depression - April 21st 2010, 12:21 AM

OP, I have the same problem. This one girl at my lunch table turned to me and said, "You looked depressed." The next day? She started pretending she was 'depressed.' They don't really understand it and think it's hilarious to make fun of depressed people. Or this one girl is a lot worse and pretends that she's suicidal and writes these poems about wanting to die because of her boyfriend. I don't get why exactly she would do something like that but she does. Her parents don't do anything about it.


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Re: faking depression - April 21st 2010, 12:44 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by youareunstoppable View Post
Or this one girl is a lot worse and pretends that she's suicidal and writes these poems about wanting to die because of her boyfriend. I don't get why exactly she would do something like that but she does. Her parents don't do anything about it.
Its probably best her parents don't acknowledge it though if it's her acting out. Giving it attention could make the issue worse.
   
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Re: faking depression - April 21st 2010, 03:00 AM

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Originally Posted by ☣ ArcAngel ☣ View Post
Its probably best her parents don't acknowledge it though if it's her acting out. Giving it attention could make the issue worse.
True. She pretends she's bipolar. I know that she's pretending because my dad said bipolar doesn't usually start happening until you're past your teenage years. [My dad has been a bipolar for over 30 years now]


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Re: faking depression - April 21st 2010, 03:32 AM

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True. She pretends she's bipolar. I know that she's pretending because my dad said bipolar doesn't usually start happening until you're past your teenage years. [My dad has been a bipolar for over 30 years now]
Well your dad is right, but there are cases where if you're under 18, you can be diagnosed bipolar. But theres usually got to be something major that happens for any doctor to even consider it. Maybe stump her by asking her questions about it. If she answers something wrong, perhaps you could say "Funny, ______ isn't associated with Bipolar".
   
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Re: faking depression - April 21st 2010, 09:53 AM

I completely know where you're coming from ____ My first boyfriend told me he was "self-harming" and I realised he wasn't. I know full well he done it just to look "emo" It pissed me right off because he was the first person I ever told about me self-harming.

Tbh the emo stereotype in general annoys me ____


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Re: faking depression - April 21st 2010, 09:48 PM

Know exactly what you mean, the minute anybodys down or having a bad day they say there depressed ...they dont understand the meaning of depression and it really annoys me x


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Re: faking depression - April 21st 2010, 10:23 PM

Personally, I think people think they are 'cool' if they are 'depressed.'

Its like a damn competition to see who is more depressed than each other.

If only they know the affects real mental health does.

Its not just someone can fake illness, its the fact that they know they are faking and they just want meds to be popular etc etc etc

....pisses me off.


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Re: faking depression - April 22nd 2010, 01:25 AM

I just can't understand why someone would want to fake being depressed (well, aside from free xanax and getting out of tests, etc.) If anything, I try every day to fake NOT being depressed. Sometimes it gets to the point where I'm deceiving myself -- I'll stop taking my meds or say to myself "fuck the doctors and therapists, I can do it on my own," or something to that effect. I feel like broadcasting my depression to the world is only going to make it harder for me to have relationships, make me subject to annoying "pity friendships," and possibly restrict my rights -- though joining the army or buying numerous handguns is not on my current agenda



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Re: faking depression - April 22nd 2010, 01:25 AM

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Originally Posted by ☣ ArcAngel ☣ View Post
Well your dad is right, but there are cases where if you're under 18, you can be diagnosed bipolar. But theres usually got to be something major that happens for any doctor to even consider it. Maybe stump her by asking her questions about it. If she answers something wrong, perhaps you could say "Funny, ______ isn't associated with Bipolar".
=O I didn't know about that. Haha true. xD


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Re: faking depression - April 24th 2010, 05:23 PM

maybe they really are depressed, you never know. But they could also be faking. Depression shouldn't be take lightly though, if they are faking it or not take it seriously and tell someone. If they are faking it will have them stop and if they are it will help them
   
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Re: faking depression - April 27th 2010, 03:23 AM

It really, really pisses me off when i hear kids at school bragging about how they're depressed and they smoke pot and how they self harm. I've been depressed for a long time and I just want to kick them whenever they pretend to be depressed, and they get on my nerves so damn much. D<


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Re: faking depression - April 27th 2010, 04:56 AM

I understand exactly how you feel!

I had this friend who said she had BPD and Depression. She used the depression to get attention. She also said she was ADHD and a bunch of other things. It is sad how people use mental illnesses to get attention. They don't realize how awful a mental illness truly is.
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Re: faking depression - April 27th 2010, 04:58 AM

So true, Kitty! They seem to think that acting mopey is either fashionable, or a good way to get attention. Meanwhile, to be blunt, it fucking sucks.
   
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