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Depression and Suicide If you or a loved one is feeling depressed or suicidal, you are not alone. Talk with other users about your feelings here.

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*Rainbow*Rider* Offline
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Nothing good - June 18th 2010, 01:13 AM

What do you do when there is nothing good in your life.

Theres shopping and friends and a job and the chance of moving out...But none of it feels good. It should feel good. I should feel proud of how far I've come. Emotionally and financially.

There's no one to hold my hand or tell me its alright when I have my nightmares, or my past comes back to haunt me. I feel the need to be in constant company with people, always texting or on the internet. If I'm alone too long...well, my mind has the chance to think. And thinking just hurts. I don't want to think about my past.

Due to recent events I no longer have a big support system I used and I'm already feeling the difference.

I hate feeling like this. And as I work nights...when Im at home I often don't sleep all night. Without my past support system I'm simply going to be spending hours through the night just...thinking.

I just want...something good.



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Re: Nothing good - June 18th 2010, 01:34 AM

Hello.
You pretty much just summed up my life.

The only thing I can think of to get out of it at the moment is to do something extraordinary. Maybe you'll be better at it than I'm proving to be.

Just pick a horizon and head for it, you never know...it might work.

S.
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Re: Nothing good - June 18th 2010, 01:42 AM

I'd love to just...pack my bags and go. But I have a job, and the woman who's the closest I've ever had to a mother (not my actual mum) needs me right now. And my friend who passed away...I'd feel like I was leaving him behind if I leave this place.

I'm just scared



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Make it your business to start some fires




   
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Re: Nothing good - June 18th 2010, 01:50 AM

Sounds a lot how I feel most of the time. I tend to be on the internet and TH non-stop just because I feel a need to be in contact with people or have someone to talk to. Despite how ridiculously shy I am, I love company and feel depressed without it, regardless of what I'm doing.

I might be on the wrong track, but maybe you just need someone you can talk to about things on your mind, or who can be there for you when you have bad memories or nightmares or just feel down? If there's no one in person you can talk to or text, are there any friends online you feel close enough to talk to? There's always MSN and such too, if chat is out of the question.

Really hope things get better for you anyway


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Re: Nothing good - June 18th 2010, 01:52 AM

The issue is I can't...trust people I know in real life with my emotional stuff. Don't get me wrong, I could trust them...But...I have epic trust issues. The less you give away, the less it can be used against you.



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Re: Nothing good - June 18th 2010, 02:02 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Sitting on the shitter View Post
The issue is I can't...trust people I know in real life with my emotional stuff. Don't get me wrong, I could trust them...But...I have epic trust issues. The less you give away, the less it can be used against you.
That's definitely true. Though the more you let it build up, the more it can upset and stress you too. Trust issues and talking to people about problems can be really difficult.

Maybe just chat about regular things and let people in very gradually and build up trust over time. Knowing you have people there for you when you need can help a lot.


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*Rainbow*Rider* Offline
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Re: Nothing good - June 18th 2010, 02:15 AM

Just the replies to this thread have helped. Thank you



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