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kyliegurl Offline
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Unhappy Scared, confused and frustrated. - July 3rd 2010, 09:13 AM

This thread has been labeled as triggering, particularly on the subject of suicide, by the original poster or by a Moderator. The contents of this thread therefore might not be suitable for certain sensitive users. Please take this into consideration before continuing to read.

Hey everyone,

So like here is the thing in the past two and a half months I have like tried to kill myself four times, twice very serious (especially the last one), last time like four days ago :/ I am still feeling like I want too, deep down inside I feel like no one want to help me, here at the hospital they are like oh we are not set up to help teenagers and send me home with like my dad. I have like a councillor, eating disorder therapist and a psychiatrist but I feel like no one takes my thoughts seriously.

I know I need help, I am so afraid that my next attempt could be my last. I am so confused, I want to live but like I also don't. Now with school over for summer (I live 20 minutes from all my friends and only have a learners licence so I can't drive yet alone) and feel so isolated. Also my synchronised swimming is over until September as well. There is just so much that keep going around in my head and I have so much trouble making sense of it all.

I am just so frustrated, scared and confused :/

Leanne :/
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Eljoria Offline
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Re: Scared, confused and frustrated. - July 8th 2010, 09:56 AM

Whoa I'm quite a mentor myself if you really want to talk about something im here as its best to blurt everything out to someone who can help

Just PM me okaay? <3


Live the life.
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JackOffJill Offline
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Re: Scared, confused and frustrated. - July 8th 2010, 12:26 PM

Im so sorry that you feel like no one wants to help you. Thats really not right that at the hospital they just sent you home. That shouldnt happen. I personally am appalled when stuff like that happens because I am going into the helping field (social work) and I know I wont be able to help everyone but I want to try. I dont think anyone should be turned away. I can relate to what you said about your therapists and doctor not taking your thoughts seriously. When I was suffering from suicidal thoughts 4 years ago I had people ignore me when I told them. A few times it was my meds that were making me feel worse and my doctor ignored me and told me I was fine. I think its wrong that they dont take your seriously. Maybe you should tell your therapist how you feel like you are not being taking serious by anyone. I know that wouldnt be easy, but maybe the therapist can change how they respond to you and help show you that they are listening and hearing you.

Are there any activities that are close to your house that you can get involved in- like a club or something? I dont know. Just something to keep you involved and not isolated might help. I wish I had more ideas for what you can do since you live away from friends and all.

Just know that you are so strong and there is a reason why you are still here. There is a reason why you have survived. Please try to find that reason and hold onto it. You deserve life, you deserve happiness, you deserve to live free of all these thoughts and bad feelings. I know that right now it may be hard to see that you can be free of them but it is possible. If you need anything please PM me! Stay strong and true to yourself.

"Sometimes you have to kind of die inside in order to rise from your own ashes and believe in yourself and love yourself and become a new person." -Gerard Way
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confused, frustrated, scared

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