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Shaytun Offline
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I can't forget what I've done - July 12th 2010, 08:23 AM

I've been such an awful person for the last 5 years. I've hated so many people; people who didn't deserve it. Now I realize that.
I've never regretted living until now. I've hurt so many people; I just can't get past it.
Like with this girl. I hated people therefore I was alone and never had friends. Through all this she liked me. Invited mr to her party, which had never happened, we went to the dance together.
But I made new friends and made fun of her instead of asking her out. So I hurt her and told he she was too nice and I would never like her. She called me really upset.
I was so immature. I regret so much more. I'm a philosophical person and I understand regret is useless, painful, unenecesscary, but I just can't shake it.
I hate what I am. I used to love who I was but now no longer.


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Re: I can't forget what I've done - July 12th 2010, 08:39 AM

Maybe you should write her a letter to say how you feel and you were used to be rejected, maybe you should look to positive side.

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Re: I can't forget what I've done - July 12th 2010, 12:44 PM

What you've done in the past is unimportant, it's what you do in the future that matters.
Don't dwell on mistakes, we all make them, concentrate on how you're going to fix them instead. Tell yourself you're going to be a nice person from now on, and make up for things and be proud of yourself for that and believe in yourself. You have your entire future ahead of you. Maybe try telling the feelings you've typed here to the girl you're worried about, apologize and reassure her she's a nice person. It will make her feel a lot better.

Anyway, if you're worried this much about it, that definitely means you're a nice person at heart, don't be too hard on yourself.


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Re: I can't forget what I've done - July 12th 2010, 01:36 PM

If you feels so badly about it, apologize. explain to her you were being mean and imature, tell her shes a nice person. make her feel better, cause you seem nice now. then do nice things for others, if you do random nice things it makes you feel good and feel like your making up for bad you did :3 and dont hate yourself because youv obiously changed for the better, if your gona do that, hate who you were before, your not like that now, and do nice things to make up for it and youll feel better :3


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Re: I can't forget what I've done - July 12th 2010, 03:29 PM

Just tell her how you feel, let her know you were having a rough time and nothing you really said was on purpose or meant to hurt her, If she likes you I'm sure she'll understand, just give her some time.


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Re: I can't forget what I've done - July 13th 2010, 08:15 AM

Thanks everybody for the support. I sent her an email explaining how I felt. She has t replied yet.
I was out at lunch and she walked by with her boyfriend.
I felt ridiculous.

I'm really trying to change now. Know what I have changed. Last night I apologized to all my best friends who I lost in the past. And so far half of them thanked mr and we're friends again.
At night things catch up with me and I get really stressed out. Will anyone read what I wrote to her?
See if it was right to say?


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Re: I can't forget what I've done - July 14th 2010, 04:13 PM

Great to hear you're making up with old friends. The fact you're trying to improve and change means you really are a far better person than you give yourself credit for. Everyone makes mistakes, but there are only a few people who actually try to fix them afterward. Be proud of the progress you make and don't let the past trouble you, it's done and behind you.

If writing down what you sent her to get an opinion would help, then feel free. You could also PM it if you would rather not post it publicly.


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Re: I can't forget what I've done - July 20th 2010, 09:37 PM

I don't know who I am anymore. Life has just gotten so hard these past years


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Re: I can't forget what I've done - July 21st 2010, 04:01 AM

Hey,

We all have regrets and sadly there is nothing we can do to change the things that we regret from the past. However if you don't like who you were make the changes now. You can learn from your mistakes and move on but if you continue to hate yourself for the past it won't do any good and it might make changing harder.

You are doing a great thing by apologizing to the people in your past. You did your part and it is up to them to accept it or not. Some of them might not feel like they want to accept it; they might be scared of getting hurt again. If some of them don't accept your apology please do not beat yourself up about it instead move on and try to make the changes you want to see in your life.

I know changing can be hard because our attitude almost becomes a defense against getting hurt but if you want change enough it can and will happen.

I hope this helped and if you need anything please feel free to pm me.

Jenna


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