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Depression and Suicide If you or a loved one is feeling depressed or suicidal, you are not alone. Talk with other users about your feelings here.

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annalibelle Offline
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I have no reason to feel this way - July 14th 2010, 02:56 AM

My life is great, I know that rationally, but I don't feel that way at all.
I've been feeling lethargic and like there is weight on my chest. There's a knot in my chest too, and i cry so often now. I think i'm fat and disgusting and I feel like i have a low grade fever all the time. I already posted on the SH board that for the first time, i'm tempted.
I ruminate and think all the time about past embarassments. No one else even remebers them, but i repeat the memories and they keep me up at night.
I can't do anything well, just well enough to create expectations that I can do it better. But i can't.
I'm a useless waste of space.
I just want some one to talk me out of this. Don't tell me to talk to my parents, because in their culture, they would just see this as weakness and say i should suck it up. At best, they think mental illnesses are way way over diagnosed. They'd yell at me for sharing this with you all because they'd veiw it as embarassing the family. I can't be a problem child, since my generation in the family isn't doing so well already.


"Every mushroom cloud has a silver lining"- Owl City
   
  (#2 (permalink)) Old
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Re: I have no reason to feel this way - July 14th 2010, 09:44 PM

You have the solution, you just have to use it. You aren't a useless waste of space if you think about it, that's just how you FEEL. Emotions are not rational. To feel better you have to analyze those emotions and make them rational. Talk to a friend about it, get it off your chest. Your parents don't have to know. Just talking about it can make you feel better. It seems like you also need to be more confident in yourself. I know how easy it may sound but it's really not easy. But that doesn't mean you can't get there. Tell yourself positive things, write them down, ask other people. Because you are great, and you know that, but sometimes emotions just take over.


Whatever it is, chances are I've been there.
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  (#3 (permalink)) Old
annalibelle Offline
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Re: I have no reason to feel this way - July 14th 2010, 10:03 PM

I've been feeling this way constantly for a long time. Could I be depressed or just something else?


"Every mushroom cloud has a silver lining"- Owl City
   
  (#4 (permalink)) Old
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Re: I have no reason to feel this way - July 14th 2010, 10:48 PM

You could be depressed but I'm not a doctor so I can't diagnose you. Sometimes depression is cause by an inbalence of chemicals in the brain which could explain why you say there's no reason to feel that way.


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Re: I have no reason to feel this way - July 16th 2010, 12:50 AM

Well, you can't talk to your parents about this. They obviously don't understand, so I think you should try moving in with a different family member or a friend, someone who understands you better and can be more compassionate towards your feelings and more considerate.
As for these memories you're having, shut them out of your mind, don't even let them come into your mind and don't even focus on them, ignore them and keep fighting to just shut them out, whenever it comes into play in your mind, cover it up with something pleasant, convert it into something that makes you happy that you like to remember and eventually those bad memories will stop because you won't let them come into your mind again, so they've lost any control with you.
Remember if you need a friend I'm here to talk anytime.
   
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Re: I have no reason to feel this way - July 17th 2010, 02:16 AM

@dragon. Kingdom. I have one person, but i don't want to drag her into this, b/c she's the opposite of my parrents. I haven't really talked to her about any of this, and she's already wanted me to get "help".
Those memories aren't painfully bad or anything as much as little times that I failed. They just support the argument that I'm worthless and desgusting. So I always think of them and know that I'm a waste.


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Re: I have no reason to feel this way - July 18th 2010, 03:09 AM

But those are only a few memories and you're not a waste. Think of all the great memories that make you feel good. Don't hold it all inside, it'll just make you feel worse. I know you may not want to tell this person, but it's important to tell people rather then letting things build up inside you. Everybody makes mistakes but that doesn't mean you're a bad person! Believe in yourself. And thinking of those memories gives you a reason to be depressed. So try and think of all the good ones and make a list of all the good things about yourself so you can look at it when you're upset.


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Re: I have no reason to feel this way - July 18th 2010, 03:15 AM

@Alessa Thanks for all your help, you've been dealing with me alot recently. I've tried lots of self help techniques for the thinking. When I'm like that I can't think of any good things. A preprepared list sounds cheasy and fake, when I'm like that, and i tend to reason that the good things aren't enough to balence out how horrible I am.
P.S. you have a very pretty name


"Every mushroom cloud has a silver lining"- Owl City
   
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Whisperer Offline
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Re: I have no reason to feel this way - July 18th 2010, 03:22 AM

Aw thanks! And I'm here to help, I don't mind spending time at all. What helps for me, is I'll ask my friends to write something they like about me, then I know it's actually true because it's coming from them. I also enjoy making collages from magazines. It seems like a little thing, but if you go through magazines and cut out positive phrases it's actually pretty great. Just try different coping skills, you never know what works until you try. It took me forever to find ones that work and I still have a hard time using them in the moment. But all it takes is that little boost to get you started on something and you'll have your mind occupied.


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If I can make it out, you can too.
   
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Re: I have no reason to feel this way - July 18th 2010, 04:41 AM

I agree that talking to a friend about this is a great way to cope. Tell some trusted friends how you feel and just try to talk it out and get some support. You can also try letting it out by writing poetry (or doing other artwork) that helps you to express your feelings and emotions in a constructive way. It's going to be okay.


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last updated on 11/11/17
   
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