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Dont See the Point anymore. - July 16th 2010, 01:58 PM

I used to be so happy about everything. Gorgeous. Had a great boyfriend. Super skinny and in shape. My family all adored me. People worshipped me. Everyone loved me. Well after my boyfriend broke up with me things have went downhill. Ive been binging all the time and gained so much weight to the point where literally none of my clothes would fit if i decided to leave the house -- im pretty much refusing to leave the house right now. My family is barely close anymore. My mom can see me struggling with life and weight and the binges so is afraid to ever leave me and my dads getting mad at me too over all this. I feel so alone. and fat and just DEAD. i see no point in anything anymore. I hate high school still have a year left. I just want change but right now im a FAT BLOB so it sucks more. I dont know. I just almost literally feel like giving up. Everythings really really really really really really really really really really hard right now.
   
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Re: Dont See the Point anymore. - July 16th 2010, 06:46 PM

Hey,

Things do sound rough at the moment but don't give up because it will improve. Bad times come and go as well as the good but the good always make the bad worth living through. So please don't give up.

I know how hard it can be to gain weight but you can work on that. If you want to lose weight add more fruits and veggies to your diet and get a little exercise. But do not let your weight define you. You are beautiful no matter what and if you can accept yourself the way you are you will be all the more happier.

It sounds like a lot of your unhappiness is stemming from the break up with your boyfriend. I know that those kinds of things can be hard but you can and will get through it and remember that there are other fish in the sea. It might seem like your boyfriend was/is the only one for you but try not to think that way because it will bring you down. Break ups happen for a various number of reasons but that does not mean you won't be able to find someone just as special as your Ex-boyfriend. And, to be honest, you might find someone who is even more special than he was/is to you.

Do you have any friends that know you are struggling with all of this? If so maybe you could ask them to hang out. I know right now isolation seems like the greatest thing ever but I promise it will only make things worse. Go out with friends, take in a movie, go window shopping. Just get out because it can help you.

If you don't feel like getting together with friends maybe you could just get out by yourself. Sometimes when I either don't want to be around my friends or family or they are not available to hang out I will do something on my own. Sometimes I will go see a movie, sometimes I will go sit in the bookstore and read and sometimes I will come to the library and use their internet. It is little things like that that keep me from going into complete isolation mode and help keep me on track and less sad. Maybe they would help you.

As for your dad; maybe he isn't angry with you as much as he is frustrated that he can't help you when you are struggling. It is in parents nature to want to fix their kids problems and when they can't they get frustrated and sometimes it comes off as anger. Do you think you could sit down with you dad and explain to him how his behavior makes you feel? He might not notice that you are feeling that way and once he does he might try harder to change it. And, even if talking to him doesn't fix things at least you will be getting it off your chest and it will be one thing less for you to worry about or stress over.

I hope this helped and if you need anything feel free to pm me.

Jenna


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Re: Dont See the Point anymore. - July 17th 2010, 01:49 AM

I'm sure all the people who you say used to love you still love you. You are still the person they adore, even if you don't have the same boyfriend. You can be beautiful at any weight, and your weight is not the only facet of you. Besides, if this happened recently, it is impossible to turn into "fat blob" as you said, so soon. You aren't looking at yourself objectively. Ask someone who cares what they see, and they will still see the real you. Thihgs can only get better. Go do something that you used to like, and you will probably still like it.
P.S. binge eating is not healthy. You should talk abbout it with someone.


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