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  (#1 (permalink)) Old
theatre=life Offline
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Name: Hillary
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Sick of living - August 13th 2010, 02:02 AM

I can't take it anymore. I'm ready to give up. My friends tell me they don't want to talk to me anymore. I'm alone and hurting. I cry at the drop of a hat. I cry because somebody tells me they are here for me. I can't tell them anything though because everyone else that I told how I was feeling won't speak to me anymore. Tonight I sat on the couch where I usually sit when my family comes over. I say hi to them and they don't even hear or see me anymore. I'm invisible to them. Yesterday my grandmother called me and asked me to walk down the street to check on my great grandmother. After I went down she calls me to thank me for going down there. She continues on and gives me a lecture about how my mom is going through all this stuff and I need to be more grateful for what she does. Yeah the stuff my mom is going through isn't harder on her than it is me. I was the one who was sexually abused by their teacher.

I'm sick of living. I've thought about giving up a few times lately.

If you ever need somebody to talk to pm/vm me.

Support for victims of sexual assault or abuse can be found here start the healing
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  (#2 (permalink)) Old
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Re: Sick of living - August 13th 2010, 05:14 AM

Please don't give up, just have faith and hope. There are people who love and care about you, who can help you realize that life is a gift and it's worth living The first step towards healing is to ask for help.

Laugh as much as you breathe
and love as long as you live
  (#3 (permalink)) Old
mommy to be <3
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Re: Sick of living - August 14th 2010, 12:41 AM

Aww I'm so sorry you're going through this! It really sounds like you need some support right now. Are you seeing a counsellor? You might want to consider seeing one if you aren't already, especially about the sexual abuse (that's pretty heavy stuff!). I'm sure your family isn't purposely ignoring you. They probably have other things on their mind. Try inviting your mom out shopping or suggesting a family night to your family where you can all play games together and stuff. The way your friends have treated you tells me that they aren't real friends anyway. There are good people out there who will be your friend, and you'll find them. It's hard to meet new people when you're depressed and it is difficult to maintain friendships when you are depressed, so you should try to get a handle on your feelings before putting yourself out there again. It's okay to lean on your friends once in awhile, but day-in and day-out depression can be draining on a friendship.

I understand that right now you need support and love more than anything (which you totally deserve), but remember also that your life is in your hands. You have to fight through your depression sometimes. When you wake up you need to tell yourself "this is going to be a good day" and remind yourself of the things you are good at, the things going well in your life, and dream about your future. When people say hurtful things try to see it from their point of view and consider why they are saying the things they are, and try talking to them about it. Sometimes we get hurt just because we aren't communicating our needs enough or there are misunderstandings.

Most importantly, don't give up! If you ever need to talk feel free to pm me. I really hope you start feeling better.

From your head down to your toes,
You're not much, goodness knows.
But you're so precious to me,
Sweet as can be,
Baby of mine.
  (#4 (permalink)) Old
ruki Offline
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Re: Sick of living - August 14th 2010, 06:51 AM


i don't know what to day to make you feel better. I i want to say is that you rock and i'll be sad if you leave. you rock!! you've helped me alot. feel free to eamil, pm, vm, whatever me, ok? if u want my email PM me.

ruki ♥
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  (#5 (permalink)) Old
FlyingTrue Offline
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Re: Sick of living - August 14th 2010, 04:10 PM

I'm here if you need to talk, despite what you did to me a couple months ago, I'm willing to forgive and allow you to be my friend again if you want.
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  (#6 (permalink)) Old
**Theresa** Offline
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Re: Sick of living - August 15th 2010, 09:17 PM

i hope you are feeling better now but i am sorry that you where mistreated by you teacher that is very wrong and that wasnt right . there is nothing that can be more hurtful than that but i know how you feel because i have been abused but it has made me a stronger person, maybe you can pick someone to talk to that you can trust

i am here if you need to talk, you can always pm

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