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Depression and Suicide If you or a loved one is feeling depressed or suicidal, you are not alone. Talk with other users about your feelings here.

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  (#1 (permalink)) Old
bitesize Offline
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I feel as if I'm blaming other people for when I get depressed. - August 14th 2010, 01:49 PM

I've been feeling worse recently than I have in a long long time. Really bad. It's horrible. But at least if I'm busy or if I'm out with people all the time, i can stay distracted and not depressed. I'm scared of being by myself because when I'm alone with my own thoughts things get really bad, really horrible, and I can't cope.

The thing is, people aren't around all the time, they all have their own lives to live. I have lots of friends, but it's summer and people get busy.

I keep feeling really angry at everyone if I'm left by myself. Of course people aren't gonig to be there ALL the time and there HAS to be times when I have to spend time with myself, but I can't cope witht hat right now. I really don't know what to do.

If I text people about heading for a night out or whatever and people tell me they can't make it, I feel lie it's their fault that I'm gonig to be depressed for the evenning. I feel like they should udnerstand how terrible I'm feeling and that they should try to help me feel better,, because I would do the same for them. Even though I'm not going to come out and tell them I'm depressed, so they're supposed to figure this out for themselves and be there for me all the time.

I have a friend who's just lazy and doesn't come out. I texted her last week about going to the cinema ~ just because I knew if I didn't get out for the evening I would go crazy ~ and she was all up for it until she suddenyl texted saying 'actually, don't really feel like coming out tonight, not really bothered. sorry.' I keep getting irrationally angry if people aren't around to hang out with me and just keep me distracted from my own thoughts.

It's irrational and completely selfish, especially because I'm not going to actually SAY to anyone 'look, I'm horribly insanely depressed, just keep me busy.' I'd feel so guilty saying that. But I can't help feeling thatif I'm left with no one to hang out with and nothing to do, and will therefore end up depressed, it's their fault and they're to blame.

Sorry if this was mroe of a rant than anything. :/


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Re: I feel as if I'm blaming other people for when I get depressed. - August 15th 2010, 03:41 PM

Don't worry, everyone needs to rant sometimes. :]
It's good that you understand how it's not your friends' fault that you've been feeling depressed. However, I'm sure they want to help you. They can't help, however, if they don't know what's going on. Maybe reaching out to one of your trusted friends and telling them how you've been feeling would help you to sort out your emotions. Why have you been feeling depressed? Facing the reasons for your depression could be the key to getting out of this funk. Distracting yourself only works so long as you have the means for distraction. When you don't, things get hard--as you've seen. Once you understand why you've been feeling sad and what you can do to stop feeling like this, things should get better. PM me if you need anything. :}
   
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Re: I feel as if I'm blaming other people for when I get depressed. - August 17th 2010, 10:00 AM

It's okay to release your feelings at us. Thats what were here for right?

But yea like mentioned. It's good that you know its not your friends fault about your depression. And i completly agree on what you do to run away from your depression. Hanging with friends is always a great way to temp relieve your depression. But know that your friends arent always going to be ther for you when you need them. Although they try to be. They can't devote there life to you. But i would recommend on days they can't go out, why dont you try do something by your self. Like example there are lots of addicting online games to relieve your stress. Or work out at your local gym. All these ways helped me when my friends were busy


well hope i helped.. GL! keep your head up high
PM if anything i be happy to further help you


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  (#4 (permalink)) Old
bitesize Offline
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Re: I feel as if I'm blaming other people for when I get depressed. - August 20th 2010, 03:32 PM

I usually enjoy my own company ~ when I'm feeling normal I'll happily do things by myself ~ I like going for walks and even shopping trips on my own. But recently it's felt as though when I'm by myself I just have too much time to think, and my thoughts always turn depressive.
I've been feeling a tiny better over the past couple of days (I reeeealllllly hope that doesn't jinx anything. ) Not amazing, but it's not as aonising being by myself, and i actually turned down the chance to hang out with people the other day and chose to stay i, on my own, and it was ok. (:
For about three weeks in a row it felt like I was on the go all the time ~ my boyfriend's family were away so I was in his house every day, and in between there were parties and going-out nights and stuff, and I was constantly doing something. I think that made it harder to adjust to when I wasn't doing something. But now my life is back to a little quiet, and while it can get mundane, I don't feel like I have to be doing something all the time.

But thanks for the posts guys. (:


Honey, you're familiar, like my mirror, years ago
.....
I slithered here from Eden just to sit outside your door
...
...
Níl a shíltear mar a bhítear.
Things are not always what they seem.
   
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