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I don't cry anymore - September 6th 2010, 04:34 AM

When I was younger I always would go to one of my siblings or my parents when I started to cry no matter what I was crying about. I didn't always tell them why I was crying, but I always felt safe when they would hold me and tell me that everything would be okay.
I'm thirteen right now, and they expect me to be completely independent. In my family, weakness isn't allowed once you hit ten. When you cry in front of someone for unknown reasons, you're told to shut up, or grow up. Once you're ten, no one holds you, no one tells you that it's all going to be alright. Once you're in double-digits, you're on your own.
Because of my family, I don't cry anymore. I think that in the past year, I've cried twice. I cried twice, and every tear that fell I beat myself up for. I know that it is okay to cry, but I've learned from a young age that the less weakness you show, the better off in life you'll be. And since I've only cried a handful of times since I was nine or ten, I should be pretty well off according to my family. But I'm the complete
opposite.
Now even if I want to cry, I can't. What has my family done to me?


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you're not too far
lay down your hurt, lay down your heart
come as you are.

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Re: I don't cry anymore - September 6th 2010, 12:53 PM

Crying is completely natural, but sometimes the tears will not fall no matter what. I have trouble crying, even if I really feel like i need to, until I'm at breaking point. The important thing is for you to have an outlet for pain rather than crying. For example, going for long walks or doing something you enjoy. You might want to get some professional help to work through it too. Good luck, feel free to pm me anytime
   
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Re: I don't cry anymore - September 6th 2010, 05:45 PM

Hey there,

Crying is natural and absolutely okay. I, personally, encourage people to cry because it helps heal. Crying might not solve the problem but it helps to get those feelings out. There is a quote that I really like and it goes 'We need never be ashamed of our tears.' Whenever I am struggling with my own feelings regarding crying I remember that quote. It really helps me because it is true. Crying does not make you weak and everyone should have the right to cry.

Now, sometimes our families cannot understand crying but I don't want you to let that stop you from crying. I know it can be hard when you don't have the proper support but you can make it through. If you feel the need to cry then do it. Don't beat yourself up about either because it will only make things worse. Try to remember that crying is natural.

Also, do you have any friends that you could go to for support? If your family cannot support you while you are struggling why not try to reach out to others. I know I try and do that on occasion and it helps.

I hope this helped and if you need anything feel free to pm me.

Jenna


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