I just started college

[LoveFever]

I was so excited to go to college, to start something new, a new stage in my life. But nothing has changed. It's exactly the same as high school was for me. NO ONE talks to me. No one even looks at me or smiles or waves at me in the hall of the caf or anything. I feel so alone. Still.
I know it's partially my fault for not being outgoing. I just don't know how. Before I gained weight people always came to me. I know that sounds really horrible, but that's how it was. Or how it seemed, anyway.
I just wish I knew how to make friends and seem like a more friendly person. I'm so lonely all the time and I've been trying so hard not to cry myself to sleep every night, because I don't want my roommate to worry.
All I've been thinking about for the last few days is how I can get away with cutting. I don't want to go back there, but I don't know what else to do.
Everything is so different, yet the emotions are all the same. Cutting would be so familiar right now.
I just need help. But I can't talk to anyone here. If I told the councilor or a professor, they might send me home, and I have no peers to talk to about anything, much less something as heavy as depression.
I also don't want my parents to worry about me. I don't want to disappoint them, either. I know how much this school costs them, and I would feel so ungrateful dropping out, especially during my first semester. And it took so much to convince them to let me leave home in the first place, I don't want to prove myself wrong.
What do I do? I have literally no friends here. I sit in my room all day. I can't do anything, I can't even manage to remember assignments or my meds (which I'm aware might be a HUGE factor in why I'm feeling like this, but I take them whenever I remember.) I just need help, advice, support, anything. Please.

[PutYourHeartsUp]

I just started college too, and I'm really sorry to say that people aren't just going to come over and start talking. Do you have a common room in your dorm? Maybe if you sit out where everyone is (well, might be. Mine's always dead) then you'll meet people. Have you tried talking to the people near you in class?

I'm sure this has nothing to do with your weight. And you really CAN'T get away with cutting, I definitely know that one. Does your school have a counseling center? Going there might be helpful and I don't think they're going to send you home. Besides, it'll be better than if you ARE caught cutting.