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Alexx Offline
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I really want to die. - November 6th 2010, 03:43 PM

This thread has been labeled as triggering, particularly on the subject of suicide, by the original poster or by a Moderator. The contents of this thread therefore might not be suitable for certain sensitive users. Please take this into consideration before continuing to read.

I've been thinking over this for months. At first it was a shock I could ever feel this way but now it just seems to make sense. Sorry if you've seen me here before. I don't know who to tell.

I don't enjoy life. I was diagnosed with depression last year and have spoken to a few different counselors and tried meds and so far they haven't helped. I know these things take time but that doesn't change anything.

I just don't see the point in living, when everyone dies anyway. I am wasting people's time and space and there's really no need for that.
I am unhappy. I am. I honestly don't believe things will change and I know they won't.

I've actually gotten close to doing it. I think about how I'd go about it and the things that would definitely trigger me to do it. The only reason I'm here is because I know it would break my mother's heart, and I love her to pieces.
At the same time though, I think people should be allowed to die if they wish. It's their life. I know if I went to kill myself it wouldn't be difficult.

I take each day as it comes and it brings a whole new struggle. I don't want to keep being selfish and complaining to people but the only thing that gets me through the week is knowing I could go and talk to them. But I can't tell them about this. I can't stop crying and I'm about to be kicked out of college.

What do I do?
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Re: I really want to die. - November 6th 2010, 04:07 PM

Yep, everyone does die eventually, you're right. And it is totally their chose if they choose to take their life themselves. But really, what's the point in it? You get one chance at life, you may as well battle it out. If you end your life, that's it. No hope of things getting better, nothing. As for wasting people's time, that doesn't matter, I doubt you are anyway. This is your life, not theirs. They have their own lives to worry about. This is your life and you can do what you like with it. There are thousands of millions of opportunities in life. But there is only one in death. You are going to die anyway, why not let that happen by itself. Keep going through life, things will get better. And if they don't, you tried, and you would have had some happy experiences on the way. Being a teenager is difficult. It is difficult for everyone. Don't give up. There is so much you can still do.
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Re: I really want to die. - November 6th 2010, 05:58 PM

Bascially If I could copy and paste the above I would, instead ill add to it or maybe phrase it differently.

As she said above. You only live once. Lets face it you're going through the most difficult time of you're life and I completely understand you may feel this way.
BUT, things can ONLY and WILL get better, you are 17 years old.. There is so so much to live for! Nothing, NOTHING is worth dying over.

You need a turning point in you're life.. something that will make you stop and think.. do you know what fuck it.. ima enjoy this life while I can. This moment will come just hold on, be patient and stick at it while you can..

What doesn't kill you will only make you stronger You gunna be one tough bitch after getting through this.. which you will

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Re: I really want to die. - November 8th 2010, 08:29 PM

Thankyou both for your replies. You have no idea how much I do appreciate them.

& My point is, just that I'm miserable. I'm so unhappy and nothing will ever change that because it's the way I am. Why live a life being so unhappy? I'm trapped in this stupid unhappy state. I know people say thing's will improve, and normally I'm so open-minded, it's annoying. But I just.. I'm not open-minded about this. Because things won't improve. They haven't so far. It's been so long now. :S:S =/
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