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Never Forget Hope
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Strange Recovery - December 1st 2010, 10:44 PM

Alright, I've suffered from MDD for most of my life. I dealt with it by cutting, along with bouts of anorexia. A serious attempt at suicide which landed me in a mental hospital, and this never ending doomed feeling.

Now though, now I am better. Off all my meds and happy. Or I was just a few weeks ago.

Now I'm...not how I've ever felt before. It's the weirdest form of depression I've felt. I'm not wanting to kill myself because of any issues I'm having, but I do want to kill myself. Just because I don't know what I'm feeling.


It's like a mild form of depression, yet it's the worst I've ever felt. I guess it's probably because I used to cut and not eat for relief. Now I don't know how to handle it. Especially since being MILDLY depressed is new for me. I can do crazy depressed and happy, but mildly depressed? Nope.

So uh, I don't know what I'm looking for. So, post whatever comes to mind.
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Re: Strange Recovery - December 2nd 2010, 11:23 PM

Hey there,

The road to recovery can be a difficult one and I think we all experience a form of this at one point in time. Your body has grown used to dealing with your depression by harming itself and now that you are, actively, doing that it doesn't know how to respond to this feeling. I think the more coping skills you build the better your recovery will go.

What coping skills are you currently using? When you are really low try relying on those coping skills and if you need to try finding some other ones. Recovery is possible so don't ever give up hope on that. Just work on finding/using some coping skills and things could improve.

I also think it would be really important for you to let your doctors know what you are going through. It is important that they are involved in the good and bad of your recovery. The more they know the better able they will be to help you.

I really hope this helped and if you need anything feel free to pm me.


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  (#3 (permalink)) Old
Never Forget Hope
I can't get enough
escape_thereal_world's Avatar
Name: Kelly
Age: 30
Gender: Female
Location: Charleston, SC

Posts: 3,097
Blog Entries: 98
Join Date: January 7th 2009

Re: Strange Recovery - December 3rd 2010, 11:12 AM

Thank you Jenna. I'm currently in the middle of doctors, so I'm waiting for my new one to do some paperwork and such.

Coping skills....right now it's just comfort food xD Which is bad. But nothing else seems to work so I suppose I need to spend some time working on what helps and does not. For some reason, that never registered.

So coping skills and let my new doctor know. My boyfriend knows and he is helping. So that's always a plus.
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