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  (#1 (permalink)) Old
jaysh Offline
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Age: 26

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Join Date: February 26th 2011

I'm tired of this - February 26th 2011, 08:33 PM

I just started this account because I'm more lost than ever. I was not sure where to put this, but I feel like this is a good spot.
I am overweight. Like, for my height I am now about 50 lbs above the higher limit. I have been rather heavy my entire life, but high school sucks. In january 2010 i started a diet and lost 53 lbs by july. I was so proud of myself and felt so good. but i was honestly completely obsessed. Then when I started school again, it was a whole new year with new classes, and I had so much more to worry about academically. I stopped thinking about my weight, i started slowly gaining weight, and I told myself it was ok. I have gained back everything now. Every single ounce I lost. And I have been so depressed lately it is unbearable. Whats worse is I don't have many close friends. I have one, really. And she is skinny and does not care at all. I am not sure if it is just my lack of self esteem because of my weight, but I feel like nobody wants to be around me at all. My friends do not care at all that I look horrible and have stopped caring about things. I feel so alone. I hate to be the teenager that complains about this to strangers, but I feel like I have dug a hole so deep for myself, and there is no hope of me ever coming out of it. I was just going to ignore it, maybe eat my feelings a bit more. But recently I have had a lot of suicide dreams, and I have found myself crying at night and making plans, and I felt pretty serious about them. I don't know where to go or how to face myself anymore. Please help. If anyone else has had this issue, let me know. I feel like I am the only one in the world...
I just dont know how to get myself back up, or if there is even a point. It is not the first time that I have tried to lose weight, only to gain it all back. I cant feel comfortable in my own body any more. I am not sure that i ever could. I thought this time would be different, but it wasn't. If this is going to be my life forever, I do not know if i can take it.

Last edited by jaysh; February 26th 2011 at 08:40 PM.
  (#2 (permalink)) Old
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Name: Jayme
Age: 27
Gender: Female
Location: So Cal

Posts: 269
Join Date: June 14th 2009

Re: I'm tired of this - February 26th 2011, 08:45 PM

hey welcome to Teen Help. I have weight issues too, and depression. So you are most definetly not alone here. pretty much everyone on this site has one problem or another. we dont judge, we encourage and love As for you depression it sounds like you should talk to a trusted adult about it. They can help you find someone that is trained to help ppl with depression. As for your weight issues, it sounds like you know how to lose the weight, you just need motivation. Try to get yourself back on track the way you did b4. Well my name is Jayme and im here if you need anything or jus wanna talk to someone. Im all ears - be safe

"One day at a time, this is enough. Do not look back and grieve over the past for it is gone; and do not be troubled about the future, for it has not yet come. Live in the present, and make it so beautiful it will be worth remembering." -Ida Scott Taylor
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Ancora Imparo Offline
I've been here a while
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Name: Jake
Age: 27
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Location: England

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Join Date: October 6th 2010

Re: I'm tired of this - February 26th 2011, 08:51 PM

Hey there,

I'm really sorry to hear that you're finding things so tough lately but I'm really glad to see that you have come here to reach out for support and I'm sure that not only myself but all the other members here will be more than happy to do what they can in order to support you and make you feel better.

I totally understand what it's like to struggle with your weight and how much it can effect your self confidence. It's so easy to gain weight but when it comes to losing it and then keeping it off it is really difficult. However, if you're looking to try and lose weight again then eating healthy and working out is an amazing way to boost your mood and make you feel better about yourself. I know that whenever I'm feeling pretty down about things and I workout I always feel so much better and more positive afterwards because when you exercise your body releases all this good stuff that makes you feel good.

Whether you're looking to lose weight again or not though, you're beautiful just the way you are and I'm sure that you have so many things about you that make you attractive to other people, you just don't see them as you're your own worst enemy.

I promise you that you're not alone in all of this, there are so many people out there who struggle just as you do and I believe that you can get through this.

If you ever want someone to talk to then feel free to PM or VM me at anytime as I'm always more than happy to talk about everything and anything. I hope that you're feeling better soon and that I've been able to help you in one way or another.

Take care and keep smiling!

When we're lost in the madness, kindness is wisdom.
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