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  (#1 (permalink)) Old
Perfectly Flawed
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Name: Kenny
Age: 22
Gender: Female

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Join Date: January 11th 2011

I'm so...pissed. - March 27th 2011, 04:58 PM

I so fucking...mad.
I almost never get mad. I've always just bottled up my anger inside. I have never in my life ever yelled at anyone. All these years of holding my anger inside has just, come back with a vengeance. Now I'm pissed as fuck.
After finally finding happiness, depression came back and slapped me in the face. Now I'm just so full of hate.
I hate the world. If I believed in god I'd hate him too. But after all this shit of course I have no faith in him what-so-ever. I hate people who are happy because they have something I'll never have. I hate me former friends who betrayed me. I hate my roses that died. I FUCKING HATE the bullies at my school. Who CONGRATULATIONS, made me want to kill myself. I hate my knife that just ends up making it worse. I hate my poetry because it just reminds me of the pain. I hate the snow and the cold. I hate that I've put my family through hell. I hate my stupid tears and my cries. I hate the scars on my arms.
But most of all, there's one thing I hate the most. Something that I want to fucking kill. And that something is myself.
I hate everything and everyone. Except my family and friends. But I hate that I've put them through so much shit.
I want to scream at the top of my lungs. I want to beat the shit out of someone until they feel the pain I feel. I want to tear my house apart. I just want to let out my fucking rage that's eating me alive.

~I'm so dead inside,
Ever so numb.
How the hell
Can you believe the lies?
I'm okay,
I'm fine,
While giving you my sick, twisted smile.
But really?
The truth,
I can't even cry anymore.
I'm not Shelby anymore.~


   
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Rouca Offline
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Re: I'm so...pissed. - March 27th 2011, 05:15 PM

I know how you feel, what you're going through. That feeling of hating everything. I used to bottle up my anger, too, and it always hurt me so much, but I didn't want to trouble others with my problems. What you need is a real friend, someone who will always be there for you. I can help you, if you'd let me. Please, let me take away some of that burden. Message me if you want to talk.
   
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floatingangel Offline
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Re: I'm so...pissed. - March 28th 2011, 05:17 AM

hey there, i'm glad that you managed to let out your anger here (: how did it feel to finally be heard?
everyone needs somewhere to release their emotions. we've emotions for a reason, and it can motivate, and sometimes it can cripple..
you sound like you've been through quite a bit and you sound confused about your feelings..
is there anything else you'd like to tell us?



and the voice of truth tells me a different story
the voice of truth says "do not be afraid"
   
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