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Depression and Suicide If you or a loved one is feeling depressed or suicidal, you are not alone. Talk with other users about your feelings here.

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Unhappy I'm so worried... - April 1st 2011, 02:28 PM

OK, so a couple months ago i found out from my friend (Let's call him...Greg) that a different friend of mine is depressed and cuts herself. Me and her aren't that close because Greg and I used to go out, and now he dates her, so I didn't say anything.
However, last week, my friend (Let's call him...Chris) accidently told me something i WASN'T suppose to know. He told me that she had gone to the hospitol for depression, anxiety, and cutting for 2 weeks. When I found out...I freaked. I asked Greg if that was true and he got REALLY mad and started saying he wud kill Chris for telling me. Later he found out it was an accident, but he told the girl that I knew.
She doesn't trust me, and neither does Greg, so she went to our school councler and told her I knew. The councler told me not to tell anyone so that rumors didn't spread. I promised I wouldn't.
My friends knew something was wrong, and my 3 closest friends know tht I had 2 go to the councler and it had something to do with her. They don't know anything else.
Anyway, I'm still really worried about her, and I want to make sure she's ok...but I haven't talked to her since I found out. I've been afraid that she'd be mad at me for knowing...but I need to talk to her. This secret is eating me alive, and I'm constantly scared both for her, and of her. What should I do?
   
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Re: I'm so worried... - April 1st 2011, 02:40 PM

You told an authority figure. Congrats. You've won and done all you could. If she is still in hospital they will take care of her. If she's out the hospital staff obviously thought she could handle herself. You've done all you can. Trust me, I know about secrets, right now I'm holding one that could get several people thrown in jail for a few years. It's rough but you did the right thing, and all you could. However the last line.

"I'm scared both for her, and of her." ?

I have to ask, how old are you? Or at least what grade are you in. That would alllow me to better explain the situation. You have no reason to be afraid of her. In fourth grade I met a boy who cut, yet he acted proud of the scars, they obviously made him happy. He then gave himself a long gash down his arm. That scared me a bit. It worried me a bit. But you must realize by cutting they are leaving out their pure frustration on themselves. Like writing a letter to someone and tearing it up. It is only meant for you, you're anger is usually gone for a while. Depression also does not mean she will be suicidal, many people can be depressed without having any thoughts of suicide (I think 75%...) and some people (Like myself) can feel suicidal without being depressed. Do not avoid this person, it will only make them feel worse. I was avoided because I went through depression at an unusual age of ten, and everyone avoided me completely. I developed a hate of people. And anxiety of them. Be a good friend to this friend, do your best. Be strong when they can't.

- Justin
   
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Re: I'm so worried... - April 1st 2011, 04:00 PM

Ok, I didn't tell anyone. I never told my parents or a teacher or any adult. Idk how she ended up in a hospitol, i just know she was there for 2 weeks. She's out now. She'd told Chris wat had happened and he told me. I wasn't suppose to find out. However, I'd known she was depressed long before then. Greg had told me cuz he was scared. Idk how she's doing now...
I'm in 8th grade, btw
   
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Re: I'm so worried... - April 1st 2011, 05:15 PM

I thought you told the school councilor? In anyevent, if she ended up in hospital her parent's know about the situation as well. You might not have been supposed to find out, but you did. "Chris" apparently confided in you, and that alone means he thinks you deserve to know. It seems like a friend of your friend kind of deal, but really it isn't for you to solve. It's for the doctors at the hospital, her parents, her close friends and herself to solve. You've done nothing wrong and it's not your problem to fix. Best of luck with your friends though, and I hope in the future "she" can solve her problems.
   
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Re: I'm so worried... - April 1st 2011, 07:48 PM

Thanks. PM me sometime
   
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