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I need to get out of here - May 9th 2011, 12:16 AM

I'm sick of this town. I've lived here my entire life. I'm sick of the people that surround me. I'm sick of my "friends". I'm sick of my school. I'm sick of depression. I'm sick of this weather. It's May and it's only 50-60 degrees on average, and always cloudy, cold and rainy. The forecast does not improve over the next few weeks, either. I will barely have a summer. I can't take another winter. I don't want to stay in the northeast for specifically that reason. I haven't seen the sun for more than a few hours in months. It's always cloudy here. If we're lucky to have one sunny day, it's gone by the next. I need to go to California. I need to go to a place where there's sun, warmth, beaches, palm trees, cute boys, and just a different fucking place! I don't want to go to the south for college, and California is too far in case I need to come home for some reason. I was looking into Maryland because the location is ideal- warm but not too far away, very beautiful weather and beaches. But I can't find any colleges there that would interest me. I'm looking into DC, which is right near by, but it's not the same. I like the Northeast, both culturally, politically and geographically... but I need a change of scenery. I need to go somewhere different. If my parents told me we had to move, I would pack up and leave without looking back. I need to start a new life. My dad almost got a job in California but they didn't give it to him. I was really excited, too. I have to get out of here.

My depression is getting so bad. I can't stay here another year. I'm suffocating.
   
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Re: I need to get out of here - May 9th 2011, 05:47 AM

wow. you just explained my situation...only opposite. I HATE california. Basically the hot and sunny weather depresses me so bad. We should switch places haha no but seriously A change of scenery is a good thing. I recently took a trip to Colorado and it inspired me that there is a world beyond the sunshine and smog. Ever considered community college? its cheaper anyways... or there is online college, then u can live wherever you want. Well hav u ever looked into treatment for ur depression? like getting counciling? It really dose help.


"One day at a time, this is enough. Do not look back and grieve over the past for it is gone; and do not be troubled about the future, for it has not yet come. Live in the present, and make it so beautiful it will be worth remembering." -Ida Scott Taylor
   
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Re: I need to get out of here - May 10th 2011, 01:41 AM

Oh my god I don't understand how you could hate California O_O I've never been there but it's California! BEACHES, SUN AND PALM TREES PLEASE. Like, I'm watching a show and it's filmed in Florida, and it's SO BEAUTIFUL. I honestly get tears in my eyes when I compare my surroundings to where I could be living. Beaches and sun > tiny town in the middle of fucking nowhere, New York, surrounded by farmland, mountains and nearby suburbia. the sun was out today but it was still cold! We can't control the weather, but we can control where we live. I just want to move...

I could never go to a community college. I want the real college experience. I know some people go just for financial reasons, which I really should because we're struggling, but I need to actually go to college and get the experience. For the same reasons, online college isn't the same. It's not "college", it's just online courses to get the same degree.

And yes, I have a psychologist with regular appointments (and occasionally see the school counselor if I need someone to talk to ASAP), and have seen a psychologist on-and-off since about 6th grade. I take pills. I exercise (well... I get physical activity haha), I wear nice clothes and do good things for myself, I go out and have fun (even if my friends are boring), and nothing helps. There's not much else that can be done if the chemical imbalance in your brain is so persistent that it won't balance out. It's not a situation that will pass and all will be well. It's in my mind, not my surroundings.
   
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Re: I need to get out of here - May 13th 2011, 11:48 PM

I hate being hot.. anything over 80 degrees is hot in my opinion. and where i live dosent get any snow. that really pisses me off. even when it winter its just equivilant to autum in other states. I think i should move to Alaska, cuz Cali is hell in my opinion. Your so lucky. ur life is quiet and you can go camping all u want! id kill to live where u do.
Anyways, well sometimes the dr dosent know the rite pills to give u right away. I had to go thru like 5 pills b4 i found the anti-depressant that worked right for me. So just make sure to let ur dr know that the pills ur on arent working as well as they should be, maybe he can get u a different one.


"One day at a time, this is enough. Do not look back and grieve over the past for it is gone; and do not be troubled about the future, for it has not yet come. Live in the present, and make it so beautiful it will be worth remembering." -Ida Scott Taylor
   
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Re: I need to get out of here - May 13th 2011, 11:51 PM

Move to Colorado? You can have snow flurries in May one weekend and then have it be 80 degrees the next weekend?
   
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