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Depression and Suicide If you or a loved one is feeling depressed or suicidal, you are not alone. Talk with other users about your feelings here.

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  (#1 (permalink)) Old
bayhorse321 Offline
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I can't hold on to long. - June 13th 2011, 04:01 AM

This thread has been labeled as triggering, particularly on the subject of suicide, by the original poster or by a Moderator. The contents of this thread therefore might not be suitable for certain sensitive users. Please take this into consideration before continuing to read.

I struggle with this topic myself. I think about suicide almost everyday. How much easier it would be for me to just end my life. It feels like no one cares. I honestly feel like a zombie half my life anyways just floating through. No one see's me. I don't know how much longer I can take this pain. hurting myself is not even enough anymore, sometimes I just want to give up. What should I do?
   
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Re: I can't hold on to long. - June 13th 2011, 04:20 AM

Please don't. I honestly know how you feel right now, and I was on the edge just as you were. I know that you feel as if you have no escape but you need to hold on longer. I really hope things do get better for you very soon because no one deserves feeling like this. You are strong to already have made it with all your pain.

PM me anytime, I'm an insomniac I will be up for hours.


"...and I've lost who I am, and I can't understand.."

Here for anyone.. PM me or add me, anything.
   
  (#3 (permalink)) Old
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Re: I can't hold on to long. - June 13th 2011, 04:22 AM

Well for starters you've taken a good step to recovery - just by coming here.

I know exactly how you feel, but trust me sweetie suicide is never the answer. (please bear with me, I'm sure that's the last thing you want to hear).

My best friend thought no one cared about her either. I did, and apparently so did about 700 other people who went to her funeral. By far her choice has been the most difficult thing to deal with for me...and I'm sure there's at least one person in your life (whether you're aware or not) who would feel the same as I do and react the same as I do about what my best friend did about you.

I know how it is to feel alone, but sweetie, no one is ever truly alone. Sometimes we just have to really search to find the people that care, as sad as it is those who truly love and care about us aren't always upfront and open about it.

As I said, you've taken an important step towards getting better by coming here. I believe the next best thing for you to do is either:
A) seek out someone who is willing to listen (be it a friend, family member, teacher, someone on here or another site, ect)
Or if you feel there is no one (after really thinking about who would listen)
B) making an appointment with a counselor at your school (or out of school) to talk to and help sort out why you feel the way you do and to figure out what steps you can begin to take to make yourself feel better.

I know how intimidating it can feel to think about going to a counselor - but the great thing is you choose when to tell him/her what you want. If you don't want to tell them something right away, you don't have to.

Please, please know you aren't alone in feeling this way, and there is hope, even if it seems impossible to find. If you ever want to talk about anything, I'm just a PM/VM/Add away

Keep your chin up and stay strong <3
Nikki


♪♫"The mirror only shows
The shell of what's below
You can't go on suffering
The illusion of control
It's time for letting go
You can't go on suffering
And now you know
Now you know"♪♫
'Now You Know' - 2Cents
Things get better.
Always keep fighting.
❤Feel free to PM/VM, or add me if you ever need a friend, or someone to talk to. I'm online quite often.
Add me on FB <--- apparently this is my creeper face.
   
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Re: I can't hold on to long. - June 13th 2011, 02:46 PM

It hurts... My chest and body hurts. I feel like I don't have anything left. The only thing that is worth living for is my horse, I am trying to hold on as tightly as I can to that but even with her I feel like I Am slipping away.
   
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Re: I can't hold on to long. - June 13th 2011, 03:16 PM

i dont know how to help i am in the same situation as u but if u would like to have someone to listen to i can help with that
my msn is steph_sheedy88@live.com.au
   
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Re: I can't hold on to long. - June 13th 2011, 03:35 PM

I know what you mean sweetie. Is there anyone who you can talk to? Friends maybe?


♪♫"The mirror only shows
The shell of what's below
You can't go on suffering
The illusion of control
It's time for letting go
You can't go on suffering
And now you know
Now you know"♪♫
'Now You Know' - 2Cents
Things get better.
Always keep fighting.
❤Feel free to PM/VM, or add me if you ever need a friend, or someone to talk to. I'm online quite often.
Add me on FB <--- apparently this is my creeper face.
   
  (#7 (permalink)) Old
bayhorse321 Offline
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Re: I can't hold on to long. - June 13th 2011, 03:55 PM

I try to talk to them. They keep shutting me out. I have no one.
   
  (#8 (permalink)) Old
Theres always someone. <3
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Re: I can't hold on to long. - June 13th 2011, 04:37 PM

I'm sorry that you feel you have no one....but you always have all of us on here! There's thousands of members here willing to listen and offer support. I know it's not quite the same, but it's a start. Please don't give up. You'll find people from your everyday life, it'll just take time


♪♫"The mirror only shows
The shell of what's below
You can't go on suffering
The illusion of control
It's time for letting go
You can't go on suffering
And now you know
Now you know"♪♫
'Now You Know' - 2Cents
Things get better.
Always keep fighting.
❤Feel free to PM/VM, or add me if you ever need a friend, or someone to talk to. I'm online quite often.
Add me on FB <--- apparently this is my creeper face.
   
  (#9 (permalink)) Old
bayhorse321 Offline
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Re: I can't hold on to long. - June 14th 2011, 06:07 PM

I want to talk to someone like a counselor but I am so scared to do it. I am not sure why this is...
   
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Re: I can't hold on to long. - June 14th 2011, 06:49 PM

Welcome to normal person land! Talking to ANYONE about something personal like this is usually scary for anyone. I've never totally figured it out myself, but I think it's A) fear of judgement by others (which in the case of a counselor, you don't really need to worry about) and B) fear of actions that someone will take that we don't want to happen. In the case of B, anything that a counselor, or doctor, or friend, or parent, or anybody does in this situation is to help YOU. So there's nothing to fear there, I promise.

Just so you know, talking to that person the first time is the scariest part of getting help with something. After that, it doesn't seem so scary. Just go for it!! It'll be okay


Chris
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last updated on 11/11/17
   
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Re: I can't hold on to long. - June 14th 2011, 11:24 PM

Thank You. I hope to bring myself to talk to someone really soon about everything.
   
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