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Depression and Suicide If you or a loved one is feeling depressed or suicidal, you are not alone. Talk with other users about your feelings here.

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Name: Victoria
Gender: Female
Location: Hiding, SHHH!(;

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Join Date: November 1st 2010

Black Hole - June 17th 2011, 06:55 PM

Somedays it's okay, or at least bearable.
It's not like I never laugh...but it happens very seldom.
I feel like everyone is against me.
Everyone is talking behind my back.
No one will respond to my texts.
Nobody cares about my dead fish.
Even though I cried for three hours.
Nobody wants to listen...all they want to do is talk.
Zeke is at camp...I don't even have him to vent to.
I never see him because we're busy in the summer.
I miss him most of all.
It's all being bottled up.
I want to leave, everywhere I go, I get the looks.
Looks of disappointment.
"I'm better than you" stares.
I just want to kill myself, to show them.
Show them that I'm better.
Show them how much pain they've caused me.
And for my sake.
Who would cry?
Would anyone remember me?
Miss me?
Grieve me?


"It doesn't matter if you're gay, straight, purple, orange, dinosaur-I don't care" --Darren Criss




I can brown, I can be [COLOR="rgb(160, 82, 45)"]blue[/color], I can be violet sky! I can be hurtful, I can be purple, I can be anything you like! Gotta be green, gotta be mean, gotta be everything more...why don't you like me, why don't you like me, why don't you walk out the door?
   
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SouthernBelle. Offline
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Name: Anna
Gender: Female
Location: West Virginia, US

Posts: 1,056
Blog Entries: 5
Join Date: November 30th 2010

Re: Black Hole - June 17th 2011, 07:51 PM

Make new friends, or at least temporary ones, until Zeke gets back from camp. Don't bottle up your feelings, whatever you do; feel free to PM me any time you need to talk.

About your dead fish: My cat died while I was going through a depression, and thought it was a relatively little thing to everyone else, it nearly drove me over the edge. It was a hard thing to go through, and my cat -- Moon -- was my best friend, but my parents had to put her down because she went 'insane', even though she never was mean to me. I couldn't understand it, and I would've brought her back if there was any possible way. But there wasn't, and so I learned just to love the memories I had of her.

Losing a pet can often be the breaking point. But don't let it be. And like I said, PM me if you want to vent: And I really mean that, too.


Anna's Personal Keys to Happiness
1. Do what you want within the bounds of reason, whenever you want to, and regret nothing. 2. If you have an opinion, don't beat around the bush, or there isn't a point in saying it. 3. Don't keep the company of anyone who won't like you and will try to change you.



   
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