Alone I Break

[nohope4thehopeless]

Today, I welcomed yet another morbid embrace. I fought hard to find a reason to set foot on the floor in the morning. I finally stepped outside to a world painted black and white. Darkness has consumed every ounce of this city. Perhaps I am the only one that sees it. My life...is pointless. I'm surviving; I have yet to live. I'm tired of being alone. I'm tired of being depressed. I'm a quiet individual. My friends hardly know anything about me. Recently, I thought I had a shot at love, but who was I kidding? I couldn't allow her to love someone I hate, so I inevitably ruined my chance. She's my roommate though, and I can't exactly get away from her. I have no where to go. I have no place to call home. My family doesn't understand me. I abandoned them long ago. I'm alone. I'm apathetic. When this girl brought emotion into my heart of stone, I thought I had my chance to live. I was going to finally live after 19 years. I was so...wrong. How much longer do I have to wait? Someone please reassure me that life will persist. I'm tired of hoping it will be better tomorrow. I'm giving up. The future looks bleak. I don't want the darkness to consume me to the point of non-existence. Is there such a thing as being loved? I'm sure it's the greatest feeling in the world. I've never asked for much. All I want in life is to be...loved.

[TheKnight]

Originally Posted by nohope4thehopeless

Today, I welcomed yet another morbid embrace. I fought hard to find a reason to set foot on the floor in the morning. I finally stepped outside to a world painted black and white. Darkness has consumed every ounce of this city. Perhaps I am the only one that sees it. My life...is pointless. I'm surviving; I have yet to live. I'm tired of being alone. I'm tired of being depressed. I'm a quiet individual. My friends hardly know anything about me. Recently, I thought I had a shot at love, but who was I kidding? I couldn't allow her to love someone I hate, so I inevitably ruined my chance. She's my roommate though, and I can't exactly get away from her. I have no where to go. I have no place to call home. My family doesn't understand me. I abandoned them long ago. I'm alone. I'm apathetic. When this girl brought emotion into my heart of stone, I thought I had my chance to live. I was going to finally live after 19 years. I was so...wrong. How much longer do I have to wait? Someone please reassure me that life will persist. I'm tired of hoping it will be better tomorrow. I'm giving up. The future looks bleak. I don't want the darkness to consume me to the point of non-existence. Is there such a thing as being loved? I'm sure it's the greatest feeling in the world. I've never asked for much. All I want in life is to be...loved.

"In order to enjoy life you must live it"~Edgar Lee Masters. I can tell you right now that you should now give up. That love is out there. You just can't give up. You MUST persist. You must keep going. That's the only way you'll find it. Try to participate in selfless acts of service. I've learned that when we try to improve our world, when we embrace humility, when we love mankind, and when we work for causes outside of ourselves, and work for something bigger then us, we can gain true happiness. Just keep on living life, keep on going. Try to bridge the gaps with your family and friends. Try to re-integrate yourself. I guarantee it will be rewarding.

[nohope4thehopeless]

Originally Posted by TheKnight

"In order to enjoy life you must live it"~Edgar Lee Masters. I can tell you right now that you should now give up. That love is out there. You just can't give up. You MUST persist. You must keep going. That's the only way you'll find it. Try to participate in selfless acts of service. I've learned that when we try to improve our world, when we embrace humility, when we love mankind, and when we work for causes outside of ourselves, and work for something bigger then us, we can gain true happiness. Just keep on living life, keep on going. Try to bridge the gaps with your family and friends. Try to re-integrate yourself. I guarantee it will be rewarding.

I donate to charities. I put others before me. I'm always there when someone needs a shoulder to lean on. Where's my shoulder? Why do I have to be the nice guy that never makes the cut? Why do I have to be the guy that is always the best friend? Why do jerks manage to climb higher in life when it comes to love than I? Persistence will only suffocate me by realizing the many things that I can't have; the many things I can't be. I'm sick of it. I'm so tired of being lonely.

[Just Julie]

We're all a little tired of being lonely..

And my best friends mean a lot to me. I'd rather have the best friends, then a crap boyfriend. (I stay away from jerks... I'm so afraid of them, I avoid dating altogether.)
If you need a shoulder, have my cyber shoulder. Haha.

[TheKnight]

Originally Posted by nohope4thehopeless

I donate to charities. I put others before me. I'm always there when someone needs a shoulder to lean on. Where's my shoulder? Why do I have to be the nice guy that never makes the cut? Why do I have to be the guy that is always the best friend? Why do jerks manage to climb higher in life when it comes to love than I? Persistence will only suffocate me by realizing the many things that I can't have; the many things I can't be. I'm sick of it. I'm so tired of being lonely.

I suppose I can't change your mind. But in my opinion it's all about mindset. You're alive. You are doing well (I assume because you have the internet). Of course you'll be depressed if you only focus on what you don't have. That's why you should focus on what you do have. Find joy in life. And if your life is riddled with negative circumstances then change them. Go out and look and search for happiness. It's not going to fall in your lap.

[MadPoet]

Hey there. Sounds like things are rough for you right now.
I'm not going to preach to you and tell you to "have a positive mindset or your doomed forever" because the truth is that having a positive mindset in the world we live in today is next to impossible for a lot of people, including myself. But I think that the greatest advice I've ever been given is that even through times of pain and suffering, somewhere there's happiness, and light, and people who care. It's hard to see when the world seems like such a terrible place, and people only hurt us, but love and good is always out there. Just because we cant see it, and feel it right now, doesn't mean it's not there. I'm not sure who said this but I ran across this quote one time that says "So many of lives true failures are the ones who gave up just before they were about to win." And you know, that's so completely true. So many people give up because of one broken heart, when really a new chance to be loved and to love was right in front of them. They just didn't know it. It's all about hope. And even when it seems like you have none, there's still always a reason for you to stay alive. You have a heart beating in your chest. You have the chance to live another day tomorrow. So many people would kill to have what you have, and what you might have in the future. Things get better. Sure, there's plain sh*t in the world, but we can't let it blind us from the good in the world. There's still plenty of that to go around when we need it. Sometimes we just have to hold on a lot longer then we would like to, but it's worth it in the end. Someone will come along and you suddenly wont feel lonely anymore. It's simple as that. As long as you promise yourself that you'll still be here when it happens.

You're strong. Important. And you deserve to be alive. And even though it might not seem like you are now, you're meant to be loved and cared about. And one day you definitely will be. Hang in there, I'm sure everything will be just fine

- Amanda.