TeenHelp
Support Forums Today's Posts

Get Advice Connect with TeenHelp Resources
HelpLINK Facebook     Twitter     Tumblr     Instagram    Hotlines    Safety Zone    Alternatives


You are not registered or have not logged in

Hello guest! (Not a guest? Log in above!)

As a guest on TeenHelp you are only able to use some of our site's features. By registering an account you will be able to enjoy unlimited access to our site, and will be able to:

  • Connect with thousands of teenagers worldwide by actively taking part in our Support Forums and Chat Room.
  • Find others with similar interests in our Social Groups.
  • Express yourself through our Blogs, Picture Albums and User Profiles.
  • And much much more!

Signing up is free, anonymous and will only take a few moments, so click here to register now!


Depression and Suicide If you or a loved one is feeling depressed or suicidal, you are not alone. Talk with other users about your feelings here.

Closed Thread
 
Thread Tools Search this Thread
  (#1 (permalink)) Old
Member
Regular TeenHelper
*****
 
*thegirlinthecorner-TAN*'s Avatar
 
Name: Nakita
Age: 24
Gender: Female
Location: Lost in Wonderland

Posts: 469
Blog Entries: 12
Join Date: July 27th 2011

my song, what i listen to when i feel suicidal - August 16th 2011, 05:07 PM

This thread has been labeled as triggering, particularly on the subject of suicide, by the original poster or by a Moderator. The contents of this thread therefore might not be suitable for certain sensitive users. Please take this into consideration before continuing to read.

i have tried to kill myself twice and every time i tried this song came to mind. i sang it to myself and found that i was able to calm down enough to let go of the knife or pull the plug out of the tub and let the water drain out. the reasons i have tried seem stupid after the attempts. i just wanted to let go and drift away.
the first time was because my best friend told me that i was an annoying bitch and he didn't see why he was my friend because all i did was take his friendship and didn't give anything back. i cried for hours and then tried to drown myself. i have always tried to be a good friend to him and listened when he talked and then when i needed to talk he ignored me.
the third time was because my grandma died and i felt like i didn't have time to grieve. all i have ever wanted is to be where she is. i just want to see her and have her sing to me like she did when i was little. i need her and it scares me. after her funeral i held a knife to my wrist and was ready to open my vein. i felt arms wrap around me and a pair of lips kiss my forehead but when i opened my eyes nobody was there. i believe in my heart of hearts that it was her telling me she was with me.
i know i'm depressed but i don't know how to ask for help. i know its wrong to want to die but i feel like everyones life would be better if i wasn't in it. if you can help, all i ask is please don't tell me that i'm selfish or that i need to be hospitalized. all i want is someone to tell me that i'm worthy of the air i breathe and the friends that have stood beside me through it all.
"No one knows what it's like To be the bad man To be the sad man
Behind blue eyes And no one knows What it's like to be hated
To be fated to telling only lies
But my dreams they aren't as empty As my conscience seems to be
I have hours, only lonely My love is vengeance
That's never free
No one knows what its like To feel these feelings
Like i do, and i blame you! No one bites back as hard
On their anger None of my pain and woe
Can show through
Discover l.i.m.p. say it [x4] No one knows what its like
To be mistreated, to be defeated Behind blue eyes
No one knows how to say That they're sorry and don't worry
I'm not telling lies
No one knows what its like To be the bad man, to be the sad man
Behind blue eyes."





"Stop acting like you know what I've been through, you know nothing until you've actually lived every moment and felt every ounce of pain that I have."

"Someone asked me if i missed you, I just walked away then I whispered, so much" I'll miss you forever, Vernon and Charlene.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9bWrL...eature=related
   
1 user(s) liked this post or found it helpful.
  (#2 (permalink)) Old
Liz94 Offline
Here I go again
Regular TeenHelper
*****
 
Liz94's Avatar
 
Name: Elizabeth
Age: 25
Gender: Genderqueer
Location: Woolton Hill

Posts: 464
Blog Entries: 37
Join Date: February 28th 2009

Re: my song, what i listen to when i feel suicidal - August 16th 2011, 06:04 PM

Nakita you do deserve to be alive and enjoy life you really really do. Things seem bleak now, but they will get better I am sure of it.

If you are finding it difficult to tell an adult you trust then try writing them a letter or texting them. Telling someone is scary, but one of the best decisions you will ever make as they can helpyou get the professional help that you need.

If you don't already keep a diary so that you can make sense of your emotions it really helps you sort out reasons for your feelings and I think that knowing why you feel depressed can help you see a way out and prevent attemping suicide, well it does for me anyway.

You can get through this. Stay strong and keep fighting for your life is worth living as you are a great selfless supportive person. Many people love you and don't you forget that.

Take care

<3 <3


"Casting all your anxiety upon Him, because He cares for you." 1 Peter 5:7

"For God gave us a spirit not of fear but of power and love and self-control." 2 Timothy 1:7

"Do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewal of your mind, that by testing you may discern what is the will of God, what is good and acceptable and perfect." Romans 12:2

PM/VM me anytime
LIZ
  Send a message via MSN to Liz94  
  (#3 (permalink)) Old
Member
Regular TeenHelper
*****
 
*thegirlinthecorner-TAN*'s Avatar
 
Name: Nakita
Age: 24
Gender: Female
Location: Lost in Wonderland

Posts: 469
Blog Entries: 12
Join Date: July 27th 2011

Re: my song, what i listen to when i feel suicidal - August 16th 2011, 08:26 PM

thanks liz. and i do keep a journal, i have kept one since last year when my friend that i liked moved and i felt bad. it does help me but i still feel confused.





"Stop acting like you know what I've been through, you know nothing until you've actually lived every moment and felt every ounce of pain that I have."

"Someone asked me if i missed you, I just walked away then I whispered, so much" I'll miss you forever, Vernon and Charlene.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9bWrL...eature=related
   
  (#4 (permalink)) Old
alibear101 Offline
Member
Junior TeenHelper
****
 
alibear101's Avatar
 
Name: Alyssa
Age: 22
Gender: Female
Location: Canada

Posts: 241
Blog Entries: 4
Join Date: May 6th 2011

Re: my song, what i listen to when i feel suicidal - August 16th 2011, 11:31 PM

hun you have every single right on this planet to be alive. you care so much about people that you are willing to die for them.. as sad as you be right now you will get better. eventually you will find something worth holding onto whether that is a girl/guy whatever your preference, or a job or something. in the end everything will work out. until then you have to surround yourself with people whom you love and care for. don't be afraid to show your true feelings, people who care about you will support you and in the end you will know who is right <3 message me anytime I'm always listening


Everybody dies, but not everybody lives <3
  Send a message via MSN to alibear101  
  (#5 (permalink)) Old
Member
Regular TeenHelper
*****
 
*thegirlinthecorner-TAN*'s Avatar
 
Name: Nakita
Age: 24
Gender: Female
Location: Lost in Wonderland

Posts: 469
Blog Entries: 12
Join Date: July 27th 2011

Re: my song, what i listen to when i feel suicidal - August 17th 2011, 10:26 PM

"sometimes i have good days
where its all rainbows and butterflies
and the smile never falls from my face
but then there are the bad days
where world is dark and gray
and the frown is never far from my face.
he made me smile if just for awhile
she made me feel loved
like they were sent from above.
the day they left is the day
my smile faded."
i don't want to feel this way. i don't want to want to kill myself but i can't tell my mom. i can't talk, its never been a thing i do well. talking about my feelings makes me feel selfish, or like i'm wasting peoples time.





"Stop acting like you know what I've been through, you know nothing until you've actually lived every moment and felt every ounce of pain that I have."

"Someone asked me if i missed you, I just walked away then I whispered, so much" I'll miss you forever, Vernon and Charlene.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9bWrL...eature=related
   
  (#6 (permalink)) Old
Evanescent Offline
Love Is The Movement
I've been here a while
********
 
Evanescent's Avatar
 
Name: Nicole (Nikki)
Gender: Female
Location: USA

Posts: 1,697
Blog Entries: 6
Join Date: January 29th 2009

Re: my song, what i listen to when i feel suicidal - August 18th 2011, 03:24 AM

Nakita,
You ABSOLUTELY deserve to be alive. I'm sorry that you are feeling this way, I know how aweful it feels to not want to be alive and I also know what it feels like to not want to be alive when you lose someone so important to you. I do believe that your grandma was with you that night and that she will with you for the rest of life. I'm sorry that your friend said that you, it's understandable that it upset you.

I think that it's great that you have found the song that can calm you down enough to be able to rethink the situation. Not many people can do that, and I'm glad you can. Hopefully it won't get to that point again but we never know. I think that this is something that you need to talk to your parents about they can help you get counseling to help you process your feelings and to help you deal with your grief. I don't know if you have started school yet or not but you can talk to a teacher or guideance counselor and they can help you talk to your parents.

Know that you always have support here. If you ever need someone to talk to or if you just want to chat feel free to PM me.


"Shoot for the moon, even if you miss you'll land among the stars."

"For those who don't care, for those who can't see, never give up, always thrive to be free."

Smile, you are beautiful www.operationbeautiful.com

Blessed Be!
Nicole AKA Nikki
Artist, Poet, and Future Social Worker
   
  (#7 (permalink)) Old
Member
Regular TeenHelper
*****
 
*thegirlinthecorner-TAN*'s Avatar
 
Name: Nakita
Age: 24
Gender: Female
Location: Lost in Wonderland

Posts: 469
Blog Entries: 12
Join Date: July 27th 2011

Re: my song, what i listen to when i feel suicidal - August 19th 2011, 12:05 AM

i just miss the people who i could actually talk to. two died, one moved, and one no longer talks to me.





"Stop acting like you know what I've been through, you know nothing until you've actually lived every moment and felt every ounce of pain that I have."

"Someone asked me if i missed you, I just walked away then I whispered, so much" I'll miss you forever, Vernon and Charlene.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9bWrL...eature=related
   
  (#8 (permalink)) Old
Darrenboy! Offline
my long tongue is long.
Senior TeenHelper
*******
 
Darrenboy!'s Avatar
 
Age: 41
Location: MARS! :D

Posts: 944
Blog Entries: 1
Join Date: January 5th 2009

Re: my song, what i listen to when i feel suicidal - August 19th 2011, 05:30 AM

Nakita. do not give up . remember things like these happen, but if you can push past this... i assure you happy, good things will happen. why not try going to join new activities such as dancing or whatever? im sure that good things will happen when you mix around with new people.

im sure there will be awesome friends around that will support you through, day and night.. all the way.

we loveeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee you so much.


Those who have went through more pain than everyone else, and want to protect anyone and everyone they know and care for from that pain, are stronger than everyone.

we come, we help, we stick and never leave. pm me anytimeee!

Official member of the completely Unofficial free hugs Club !

I'm firing mah Hugs!
   
  (#9 (permalink)) Old
Member
Regular TeenHelper
*****
 
*thegirlinthecorner-TAN*'s Avatar
 
Name: Nakita
Age: 24
Gender: Female
Location: Lost in Wonderland

Posts: 469
Blog Entries: 12
Join Date: July 27th 2011

Re: my song, what i listen to when i feel suicidal - August 25th 2011, 01:03 AM

i'm trying not too. today i wanted to cut so i wrote on my arm instead. i wrote STAY STRONG. its still there so i figure i've been strong today





"Stop acting like you know what I've been through, you know nothing until you've actually lived every moment and felt every ounce of pain that I have."

"Someone asked me if i missed you, I just walked away then I whispered, so much" I'll miss you forever, Vernon and Charlene.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9bWrL...eature=related
   
  (#10 (permalink)) Old
Evanescent Offline
Love Is The Movement
I've been here a while
********
 
Evanescent's Avatar
 
Name: Nicole (Nikki)
Gender: Female
Location: USA

Posts: 1,697
Blog Entries: 6
Join Date: January 29th 2009

Re: my song, what i listen to when i feel suicidal - August 25th 2011, 05:01 AM

That's great Nakita, you are a very strong person.


"Shoot for the moon, even if you miss you'll land among the stars."

"For those who don't care, for those who can't see, never give up, always thrive to be free."

Smile, you are beautiful www.operationbeautiful.com

Blessed Be!
Nicole AKA Nikki
Artist, Poet, and Future Social Worker
   
  (#11 (permalink)) Old
Member
Regular TeenHelper
*****
 
*thegirlinthecorner-TAN*'s Avatar
 
Name: Nakita
Age: 24
Gender: Female
Location: Lost in Wonderland

Posts: 469
Blog Entries: 12
Join Date: July 27th 2011

Re: my song, what i listen to when i feel suicidal - August 26th 2011, 10:35 PM

i told my best friend that i loved him today, he has a girlfriend but i couldnt stop myself





"Stop acting like you know what I've been through, you know nothing until you've actually lived every moment and felt every ounce of pain that I have."

"Someone asked me if i missed you, I just walked away then I whispered, so much" I'll miss you forever, Vernon and Charlene.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9bWrL...eature=related
   
  (#12 (permalink)) Old
oldaccount Offline
I can't get enough
*********
 
oldaccount's Avatar
 

Posts: 3,205
Blog Entries: 5
Join Date: March 30th 2011

Re: my song, what i listen to when i feel suicidal - August 28th 2011, 04:31 AM

I'm always here if you wanna talk, love. PM me ANYTIME. I care, and I lurve you See, lurve is more special then love because people don't say it as often. There's more to give and always remember I'm not the only one.
Stay strong, beautiful.
   
  (#13 (permalink)) Old
Member
Regular TeenHelper
*****
 
*thegirlinthecorner-TAN*'s Avatar
 
Name: Nakita
Age: 24
Gender: Female
Location: Lost in Wonderland

Posts: 469
Blog Entries: 12
Join Date: July 27th 2011

Re: my song, what i listen to when i feel suicidal - September 1st 2011, 12:06 AM

thanks i'm trying to be strong





"Stop acting like you know what I've been through, you know nothing until you've actually lived every moment and felt every ounce of pain that I have."

"Someone asked me if i missed you, I just walked away then I whispered, so much" I'll miss you forever, Vernon and Charlene.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9bWrL...eature=related
   
Closed Thread

Bookmarks

Tags
feel, listen, song, suicidal

Thread Tools Search this Thread
Search this Thread:

Advanced Search

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are Off
Pingbacks are Off
Refbacks are Off




All material copyright 1998-2019, TeenHelp.
Terms | Legal | Privacy | Conduct | Complaints

Powered by vBulletin®.
Copyright ©2000-2019, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.
Search engine optimization by vBSEO.
Theme developed in association with vBStyles.