Triggering (Suicide): They don't listen!!!

[volleyballchick751]

No one is listening to me!!! I need more help...They say I'm fine. Even when I was in the hospital when I o.d., they didn't believe me when I said I was trying to kill myself. I asked for therapy, and nothing. No one gives a shit, so why should I? Well I'm spiraling downwards,fast. I'm scared to tell my psychiatrist, because he said I "better not fuck up again". And my father wont allow me to go on meds again... Because he thinks that's why I o.d.

I feel like shit. I've started cutting again, and want to die. I don't know what to do anymore. I have nothing to live for, the only thing that has kept me from trying again is knowing how bad it would hurt my dad.

I don't know what else I can do to show them how serious this is. I'm not the type of person who breaks down easily, I guess that's why they don't believe me. I never see the school counselor because, well, he didn't even check in with me after my attempt. I went once since then because I had a panic attack in class....he just sent me to the office. I don't know how to get through to them...I could fake a breakdown but that would likely just make my problem worse. Any ideas, Please please answer if you do!!! They are greatly needed!!

[Total Light Storm]

What? Your psychiatrist said to not fuck up again?
If I read that right, you need a new psychiatrist in my opinion.
This is a really hard situation because you have no support from anyone, I think you should try talking to your dad and explaining to him you're serious about killing yourself and that you feel you are only living for him and that you need support from a therapist.
Let him know that you didn't OD because you were on meds and that you wanted people to realize that you have been trying to get help and that they will not listen an that you want to stop being suicidal and cutting, or at least, that's what I've gotten from this post.
If you need anyone to talk to, you can try the list of hotlines that TeenHelp has, they have hotlines for different issues and different countries. Also, a majority, if not all, are 24/7, so you can call any time you may need to.
I hope I've helped and stay strong and if you need anyone, you can PM me and I'll be glad to help.

[volleyballchick751]

Yah my psychiatrist has worse language than I do... and I don't like his methods he basically tells me a list of drugs, then asks what type I want....I wanted get a new one too but hes the closest one that is covered by our insurance (and its a 30min drive). So Im stuck with him. I have tried telling him, he didnt do anything about it.