Triggering (Suicide): When nobody understands

[icegirl]

I can't deal with it all anymore. My friends, my family, nobody get's it. My parents got divorced about a year and a half ago, but I still haven't gotten over it. Both of my parents are alcoholics and potheads. My stepdad is a prissy wannabe who doesn't leave me alone. My stepmom and my dad fight all the time. You'd think after the divorce the fighting would stop but it never did. I don't think it ever will.

But that's not all. I've gotten fatter this year, and I think I'm starting to develope an eating disorder. I yo-yo diet. I barely know my friends anymore. An extended family member died recently in a fire and I can't stop thinking about it. I don't even let people light candles. But I don't know why I care, since my thoughts lately have been almost all on suicide.

It's kind of hard when you're constantly worn down. I take advanced classes and constantly have to do well. I'm on antidepressants because my parents think I'm crazy. I read a lot and have a hard time sleeping at night, even though I'm always tired. I just want to give up. I've thought of slitting my wrists. But I don't want to give up. I want to live a life, not end it. But what I'm living now isn't a life, just one long migraine. Please help.

[xxprincessxx]

Hey,

I'm sorry about what you are going through and I know it feels like it won't get better, but it will someday! I'm glad you realize that you don't want to give up and you want a change to live a life and you will eventually! Your 14, you have plenty of time to turn it around.

I know you said that nobody understands and I know what that feels like too, but trust me when I say you have to open up to somebody because somebody will understand. I'm sure your parents don't think your crazy, just because you take anti-depressants that does not make you crazy. It should help you feel not so depressed, if they're not working maybe you should tell your doctor. Also, you really should tell somebody about the depression, suicidal thoughts and the eating problems, I'm sure somebody would listen and could help. How about another family member or a teacher at school, or seeing a therapist! People are willing to listen and help you!

You'll get through this! Just hang in there. If you ever want to talk, feel free to PM me.

[Kendall Ann]

Hey there,

I understand how difficult it can be sometimes to be around people who you think don't understand you. Often times they understand more then you think because, they've probably been through things you may not know about.

When you gain weight, don't think of it as getting fatter. There is no need to develop an eating disorder, the best weight to loose weight is, of course, diet and exercise.

Also, sometimes the downs in life are well worth the ups. Sometimes you just have to think about the fact that at least you have a family and a home and such. Being on antidepressants may be what's best for you and, definitely does not make you crazy.

I'm very glad you don't want to end your life. Things always get better. You deserve to be happy so, please try.

[minniemouseprincess]

Hey. I want you to know first that i'm REALLY glad you don't want to give up. Thats a GREAT thing, its wonderful that you have that mindset, don't lose it. I think one of the first steps to getting better is saying you want to and saying you don't want to end your life or give up. So GREAT for you. It def. sounds like you've had some hard times though. Since you don't really like your living environment now, is there any relative you can move in with maybe? You may be happier living with someone else. It also prob would help life be less stressful if you were away from the constant fighting and stuff. Thats not a good environment for anyone, especially children and teens. For everything else, I think I would just talk to a counceler about it. You could go to the school one if you wanted to.