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Depression and Suicide If you or a loved one is feeling depressed or suicidal, you are not alone. Talk with other users about your feelings here.

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will was here Offline
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Name: Will!
Age: 26
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Location: Massachusetts, United States

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Join Date: August 15th 2010

pain - February 28th 2012, 09:39 PM

I'm really upset and I don't completely know why. I want to just curl up in a ball and sleep. I do not have as a significant reason to be unhappy as other people. I have a nice family that loves me, I have stuff that other kids don't have.
But I feel no purpose to live. I don't plan on killing myself and I don't want to die but at times i feel as if I already have died. School sucks the joy out of me. The kids there are nice, the teachers all support me and there is no real reason for my to feel this pain. But i'm so busy. being busy is a good thing but I feel it's gone beyond and I find myself clinging emotionally to a certain person. I feel I do not have something. Something is missing from my life. Obviously you should reply to the people who are struggling with suicide before me. I just need some support. Please help


flower
hello my heart where have you been
I missed you when you left
you ran away with that senseless boy
and left me dim and dry
like a faded flower in the mist

Come back my heart. you have a home here
In this place that is my soul
I want to feel like whole again. don't waste your time with him

Have faith my heart. You'll get a second chance
come back to me and you will not be alone
  Send a message via AIM to will was here  
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Re: pain - February 29th 2012, 02:13 AM

Hey Will,

When you get upset there never has to be a reason for you to feel that way. Depression comes from a lack of serotonin in the brain, not always something bad happening. Other times you may not be able to think of anything bothering you but if you can dig down deep in yourself, whether that's talking with a parent or counselor or writing in a journal, eventually you will learn something that might have been tucked away for a while. Although having a loving family and being supported helps a great deal, it doesn't stop you from feeling just like other people feel. Some people think there must be one big reason why a person is depressed then when that is fixed they should be fine which is completely not true. Depression from from chemicals in the brain, genes, and things in your life. Everyone's depression comes from a different place and therefor everyone has their own way of dealing with it.

I definitely feel the same about school. I'll come home and just lay in bed and my mom will always ask what is wrong. She does this every day and every day I answer I hate school. I don't know whether she doesn't understand or she doesn't believe me but it's definitely extremely difficult to keep on a happy face in such a depressing and stressful atmosphere. If you are tired at home then sleep. If you are hungry then eat. They are simple things that we often forget or don't do when depression becomes a major factor in our days. Don't sleep the day away or eat until you feel sick. Take a few hours nap and have a healthy snack whether you're hungry or not. Depression effects everyone differently whether you can't sleep at all or you can't stop crying, there is always something to help. You may feel like you're the only one that feels this way but there are millions of people with the same feelings and tons of way to feel better but it takes a lot of hard work and perseverance. I know, when you're already depressed the last thing you feel like doing is working hard to overcome it, but that's why it's so poisonous so to say. You will learn to fight against your emotions and every time you do, you'll get stronger.

What kinds of things do you keep busy with? You are right keeping busy is very good because it keeps your mind off how you are feeling. But being busy with things you don't necessarily like doesn't help that much. Are you doing things you love or doing them just to be busy? After keeping busy just to keep busy I FINALLY found something I love. I joined a new karate school that has changed everything. I love going there and my school days feel shorter when I have karate to look forward to that afternoon. My instructor gives me way to stay fit and motivated and after I'm done with class I feel light on my feet and proud of myself. Before I started taking karate I always felt fat and slow and hours went by like days but now I have something to look forward to. See if you can find something like that to keep your mind focused on. Whether it's a new instrument, sport, or just a great book you can't put down, there has to be something out there that you will love.

I have been where you are and I am slowly crawling out of my cave of depression. Through lots of therapy, medicine, and learning coping skills I can finally see the light at the end of the tunnel I never thought would come. It definitely took hard work which I wasn't up for in the beginning but like my counselor said, you can either try hard now, or suffer a lot longer. I'm always here if you'd like to talk. I try to check my account regularly. I hope I was able to help even a little bit.

Keep your head up!
Alessa


Whatever it is, chances are I've been there.
If I can make it out, you can too.
   
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  (#3 (permalink)) Old
will was here Offline
You're stronger than you think
Average Joe
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Name: Will!
Age: 26
Gender: Male
Location: Massachusetts, United States

Posts: 102
Join Date: August 15th 2010

Smile Re: pain - February 29th 2012, 07:28 PM

I actually feel kind of good today. Nothing close to how things were yesterday. This comes and goes. I find that helping people can distract me from myself when I'm in a bad place. Kind of like a symbiotic thing, if I used the correct term. This is why teen help is so important to me. If I'm constantly prying people in the chat rooms to ask me for assistance that's sometimes why. Just so you know. It could be a chemical thing. I'm not really sure.


flower
hello my heart where have you been
I missed you when you left
you ran away with that senseless boy
and left me dim and dry
like a faded flower in the mist

Come back my heart. you have a home here
In this place that is my soul
I want to feel like whole again. don't waste your time with him

Have faith my heart. You'll get a second chance
come back to me and you will not be alone
  Send a message via AIM to will was here  
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