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-   -   Triggering (Suicide): it would be better for everyone (http://www.teenhelp.org/forums/f11-depression-suicide/t96971-would-better-everyone/)

HayleeBoo March 12th 2012 04:04 AM

it would be better for everyone
:'(i dont know where to start off... my dad left when i was 2 and hasn't even tried to make contact with me since. if it wasn't for me my mom and him would still be happily married, but ever since i was born they faught which made him leave in the end. at school no one even notices my existance, even my teachers dont exactly notice me until i have to hand something in, and then most of the time they are nice to everyone in the class except for me and i dont understand why :huh: now the only person i actually talk to and trust hates me. we were talking earlier and everything was fine then like an hour ago out of no where his girlfriend started texting me calling me a bitch and telling me to stay away from him. then like 30 mins after that he texted me saying : you're a dumb bitch that can go die in a hole. i dont appreciate my time being wasted and you're a f______ waste of space. you're the most pathetic and sad excuse for a person. you need some serious help cause you're so crazy and depressed. all you want is attention. you probably liked it when you're cousin touched you. go sit in a corner and pout and cry like the little baby you are, thats all you're good at besides cutting yourself. you're such a messed up little slutty girl.." i really dont understand where that all came from :'( i dont know what to do anymore... it honestly feels like it would be better for everyone if i just wasn't here anymore. i have literally no one anymore.

sorry for rambling on

Laurasaurus March 12th 2012 04:33 AM

Re: it would be better for everyone
:hug: You can't keep thinking like this. People love you, I'm sure your mom does. Think about how she would feel if you did something drastic.
You can't blame yourself for your parent's mistakes. It isn't your fault that your dad left, you were a baby for heaven's sake. :nosweat: You must be upset about your dad, but look at this situation from his point of view, or try. He must be scared to try to contact you because of what he did. He made a mistake, I hope he realizes it. Talk to your mom about him, see if you can do anything. Also, how would he feel if he found out you killed yourself? I'm sure he would feel horrible. :(
Your best friend's girlfriend probably had a lot to do with that text, I wouldn't take it too personally, if you can. He might not be a good friend to have if this is how he's going to act.
Suicide isn't the answer. It may seem like a good way out, but what if you fail? Think of how it would affect people. Suicide hurts, and it isn't your only way out.
Talk to your mom or a counselor, they're there to help.
:hug: PM me if you want to talk, ok?

xxprincessxx March 12th 2012 07:42 PM

Re: it would be better for everyone

I'm sorry that you are going through all of this. Sometimes life isn't fair, but that's no reason to give up you're so young, you have plenty of time to make it better and I promise it does get better eventually!

I know you said that you feel as if nobody really see's you, you have to make the notice you (in a positive manner)! I used to have that problem to because I was so shy and just didn't do anything to be noticed. Join some clubs/sports that way you'll meet people with similar interests, it would be easier to talk to them that way, or just start up a conversation with somebody in class, there maybe activties you can get involved in, in your community as well, that would be a great way to meet new people. As for your teachers maybe they just think you're a quiet kid therefore they don't talk to much to you because they don't want to make you feel awkward or anything, if you feel like talking about your problems with one of them that you feel like you would trust then I suggest asking them if they can spare a moment to talk after class or set up a time to see them. I think another person that would be good to talk to about all that you are going through is a school counselor, they can really help you though all of this!

As for your friend, if he said that then I wouldn't even consider him a friend. As was said above me, I would think his girlfriend had a lot to do with what he said to you. She's probably jealous or insecure herself which is why she started something with you, don't take it to heart! I highly doubt any of what they said is true.

I really hope you start feeling better! Please don't give up! If you feel like you are an immediate threat to yourself I would encourage you to tell an adult or call a hotline/emergency number so that you can get the proper help! Keep your head up and keep fighting! It will get better! If you ever want to talk, I'm here for you, feel free to send a PM! (:

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