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Self Harm If you or someone you know is struggling with self harm and needs advice or alternatives, we're here to help.

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Name: lahra.
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uh oh... - August 28th 2012, 12:47 PM

This thread has been labeled as triggering by the original poster or by a Moderator. Please take this into consideration before continuing to read.

ive told six people about my 'arm situation,' as they like to call it. i think theyre gonna get together and tell the teacher. i dont want them to.

they say itll benefit me. how? how is telling an old lady about my problems gonna fix anything? they cant stop me. theyll tell my mum and shell take away my stuff. i might commit suicide. i might find another 'tool' to use.

im unstoppable.


Without you there is no me.

RIP Ammie, Nan, Uncle Trev.

Lucas my little sprout <3
   
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Re: uh oh... - August 28th 2012, 05:15 PM

Hey there,

I think that the people who you think may tell the teacher are simply worried about you. They have your best interests at heart, and by telling someone it's possible that you will be able to receive more support in order to overcome the 'arm situation'. The point is, you're harming yourself, and these people obviously care enough to want to tell someone higher up about this, and while you may be worried and feel you cannot possibly overcome this problem, that's still good of them and they're within their rights to want to get you help.

How will it benefit you? To you, she may be some 'old lady', and you're right, that 'old lady' probably can't fix your problems. She's a teacher, she's not trained or qualified to, and in all honesty, nobody but you is going to fix the problem. But, by telling this teacher, it opens up a range of other support. The opportunity to talk to a school counsellor will be there, this teacher will know what's going on which is an extra method of support. The point is that it's support, and they will be able to support you in fixing the problem, especially if you speak to somebody trained and professional such as a counsellor. They can't fix your problems; unfortunately it's not as easy as that, but its' definitely a good idea to give it a shot and let them help YOU get on the road to recovery.

Perhaps it would be a good idea for you to try and find a way to tell someone yourself? I understand that's pretty tough to do, but it might be a better idea for you to come forward and seek the help than your friends to. You, after all, are the one struggling, and you know what's going on better than they do. If it's tricky, maybe write someone a letter explaining things, or write an e-mail. That way you can redraft as much as you like and build up the courage gradually to give it to them.

I understand your concerns about your mum finding out and taking things away, but what you have to realise is that she'd be doing it for you, not to get at you. Your mum loves you, and any parent would be completely terrified to find out that their child was struggling so bad. It's going to hurt her to hear that, and as a parent she only wants what's best for you. She'll take things away to protect you. Is it not a good thing that she wants you to move away from harming yourself? Now, don't get me wrong, I understand how harsh it may seem for her to do that, but as I've said, she only cares about you. And as for you moving onto another tool, there are ways to avoid that.

First of all you have to realise that you are in control of your own actions. I know that sounds like a pretty obvious statement, but many people forget that the urges do not control them and that they, in fact, control the end result of those urges. The urges will be hard to ignore, and it will take time, effort and committment to overcome this completely, but as said, there are ways to help you through this. IF you haven't already, take a look here. This is a list of alternatives and distractions you can use when you get an urge. Basically, it's a way of replacing your current coping mechanism, which is to hurt yourself. Not all of these will be useful, but don't give up when some don't work! Others will, just keep trying.

Nobody is ever unstoppable. You're not a lost cause and I assure and promise you, you never will be. You can beat this if you fight it. I know it's scary to get help and face things without SH, but there are better ways of dealing with it. I recommend you really think seriously about getting yourself some help, you're worth it after all!

I hope this helped, take care,
Hollie.


❤ Nana ❤
1953-2016

As far as we can discern,
the sole purpose of human existence
is to kindle a light in the darkness of mere being.
- Carl Jung

   
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