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Self Harm If you or someone you know is struggling with self harm and needs advice or alternatives, we're here to help.

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losthope Offline
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I want to cut - September 28th 2012, 01:07 PM

Hello-

I want to cut so bad. I don't know what to do. I need someone to talk to about this but I have no one. Cutting is the only way I feel better, I can't deal with all the pain anymore. I need it to stop. I want to be happy, I want to be normal.

Everyone says that it will get better or its not that bad or it could be worse and that just makes me feel worse and makes me want to cut more. I try so hard not to give in but at some point I always loose my motivation to not cut and I get so sad and depressed and I start to cry and going to a panic attack then I end up giving in and I feel so much better like it didn't even happen.

Wow, reading this I sound pathetic but then again I probably am.

Please help? Please?
   
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escape♥ Offline
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Re: I want to cut - September 28th 2012, 02:34 PM

Hey there.
You are never alone, I know exactly how you feel, and how terrible it is. Yeah, it could be worse, but it's bad enough as it is and that's a terrible thing to tell somebody who is suffering && struggling.
Here's a couple of things my therapist told me that helps.
-Write a ridiculously long list of things that make you happy. *it helps you realize that being happy at some point, even if it's fleeting, is still possible.*
-If your silent when you cut, think of a sound that describes the feeling you get to when you cut. For me, my therapist told me that it's probably a blood-curdling scream..the pain you have to be in to get to the point of cutting your skin is, horrific. It helps you think of different ways to express your feelings than cutting. Your sound could be anything you want it to be. You could also write, draw, etc.

*There's also a great alternatives thread here.

By the way, if you look up pathetic in the dictionary, it means deserving of sympathy.
So yes, I think you sound pathetic.
I hope things start to get better for you very soon.
Stay strong,
~paula


If you're looking for a sign not to kill yourself tonight, this is it.
"May the odds be ever in your favour"
"A strong person is one who can smile this morning like they weren't crying last night."
Your never alone, I'm always here for you. Shoot me a VM or PM.
   
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Re: I want to cut - September 29th 2012, 02:37 PM

Hey you are sooo not alone in this. One thing that really helps (and yea its very hard to do) is go to a doctor and get meds for panic attacks. It really helped me be able to think before I cut and go is it really going to make me feel any better??? If you still think ya, a couple tricks I learned are snapping the area with a rubber band or putting an ice cube over the spot. Ice will give you the pain without hurting you. Stay strong!!! You can get past this.
-Sam
   
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Re: I want to cut - September 29th 2012, 10:34 PM

Hey there,

Firstly, well done for coming to us. That's a really positive step in the right direction.

Why do you want to hurt yourself? It might sound like a stupid question but I'm wondering what you gain out of hurting yourself? For example, some people feel they deserve the pain they get through self harm, they think they need to be punished. What's your reason? And in reality, do you think it's solving anything? Do you actually think that you hurting yourself is helpful and beneficial to you?

You're never going to be in a situation where you have no one. Sometimes we can feel really alone and I can relate to that but it's important that you know there is always someone there. Whether that's a helpline, us here at Teenhelp, a friend, family member or someone from school such as a teacher and even your doctor. There is always support there, it's just down to you to use to and to let people in so that they can help you.

Cutting maybe helps you in the moment, but it isn't helping anything in reality is it? Because the urges always come back. You can cut one day, but you're going to want to hurt yourself again at some point. If self harm worked, then you'd have the urges once, cut once, and you'd feel better and never want to hurt yourself again and therefore self harm wouldn't be a problem and you wouldn't need out help. But the urges keeps coming back, doesn't it?

There are other ways to deal with the pain. Whether that's through talking to someone (friends or a mental health professional) or you can find ways to express yourself differently. Perhaps writing, reading, sports, dance, art. Have you ever tried any of these things to express yourself? It might be worth a try.

Everyone says that it will get better or its not that bad or it could be worse and that just makes me feel worse and makes me want to cut more.

It will get better. Feeling low doesn't last for ever. There are things you and others can do to help you manage the way you feel and what's going on and ways to overcome it. But until you take the steps to do so, such as talking to someone, then you won't get anywhere. There has to be a change somewhere. If you do the same thing day in and day out, you'll get the same result, you know?

YOU end up giving in. The thing is about self harm, is that its you, doing it to yourself. And to stop self harming, YOU have to stop. It's not easy. In fact, it might just be one of the hardest things you ever have to do but it is possible. Take control and take that responsibility. Because people can be there, they can support you through this but they can't stop your actions. That's down to you.

I think you need to find someone to talk to and like I said, that could be us or someone at home. Its important you talk to someone you feel able to open up to and be honest with. Who that is, doesn't matter, as long as you feel comfortable with them. I also think you need to find a way to express yourself; try some of the idea's I suggest and see whether any of them help.

Lastly, use distractions. I'm not saying everything is going to help you but there will be things out there which do help, it's just about finding them. It's about trial and error and not giving up on everything when something doesn't help.

Keep smiling, you can do this
Jessie


"Only in the dark, can you see the stars..."
Josie 12/3/2014, always in my heart. Sue 19/2/2016; Peter, Ellie, Hannah, Andy, Kirtsie RIP.

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