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Self Harm If you or someone you know is struggling with self harm and needs advice or alternatives, we're here to help.

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Scars & Swimming - July 21st 2013, 12:51 AM

Next week I'm going to visit my sister who lives a few states away. She told me that her & her husband are going to take me to a water park. I'm allergic to chlorine & bromine, both my sister & my brother-in-law know that, but they said so little chlorine is used there that it shouldn't bother me. Which leaves me in a bad position because my bathing suit reveals quite a few bad self-harm scars on my legs. I don't want my sister or brother-in-law to know that I cut myself, I don't want them to worry about me when they live so far away. I have a few recent cuts that also wouldn't be covered by my bathing suit, but I can cover them with a band-aid and say it was a shaving accident.

It's not so much that I'm opposed to the idea of getting help anymore, but I don't want it to be my sister who figures it out. Do you guys have any advice on how to cover the scars, or even how to begin to fade them(I know it will take awhile)? I know tanning would somewhat help, but I'm really pale & I only burn. Telling my sister & brother-in-law is out of the question, at least for this summer.

Thank you!

-Erin
   
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Re: Scars & Swimming - July 21st 2013, 01:20 AM

As for fading them, I have heard of Bio-oil being good for that, though I have never tried it out myself. I've used cocoa butter before to try and fade stretchmarks and it worked for those, and I've heard the Vitamin E in it is what reduces scars, so you can even try vitamin E capsules. You're right that it will take a while, though!

With me, my mom knew that I "used to" self harm so before I went swimming I reminded her of the scars in case anyone asked, but I noticed that none of my family has asked and if my own sister or bother in law have noticed, they didn't even comment. You can use the excuses of shaving or that something scratched you such as a thorny plant.

Or, if it's not too late to, you can even try and get a longer bathing suit, such as a man's swim trunks, that you can wear instead/over the bathing suit bottoms so fewer of the scars are showing, and if anyone asks you can just say you'd had a wardrobe malfunction with your bottoms.

But, if worst comes to worst, I don't think telling them necessarily would be bad. They'd only worry because they love you, after all, and even if they live far away, they can still be a support system to you and someone you can at least talk with when you need help, I bet they'd be more than willing and if nothing else helps, I bet they'd at least appreciate the fact you are being honest.

Best of luck!

-Dez


   
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Re: Scars & Swimming - July 25th 2013, 10:09 PM

I don't know about fading scars, but swim trunk is the best way. Just explain you don't like the fit of a bikini bottom or some other similar issue. Board shorts should cover most of your thighs. Also, they won't be looking, so the more you move around and have fun, the less likely they are to see anything. The key is to be relaxed. For anything low on your calves, you can try the shaving accident line, but that will only work for one or two. Do you own a cat? It's cliche, but can work if it's feasible from the appearance.
Also, try a really thick application of sunscreen when you get there right over the scars, the white of sunscreen might help. (Not sure) Make up would probably wash off. You'll want to be careful about bandaids though because they draw attention.
Good luck!
   
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Re: Scars & Swimming - July 25th 2013, 11:24 PM

I've got the same problem. This summer it dawned on me that I'll never be able to wear a swimsuit (probably ever again) without people seeing my scars. Board shorts are likely to be your best bet here. But remember, they're going to be having fun so they probably won't notice if some of your scars/cuts still show. You could try to cover them with your hand/arm but that would probably look really awkward so I wouldn't recommend that.


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Out of the ashes I'm burning like a fire. You can save your apologies, you're nothing but a liar. I've got shame, I've got scars that I will never show. I'm a survivor in more ways than you know. 'Cause all the pain and the truth, I wear like a battle wound. So ashamed, so confused, I was broken and bruised. Now I'm a warrior.
   
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