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Girl triggering me - September 3rd 2013, 09:56 PM

Hey guys, I've been 1 months and 3 weeks cutting free. I've started school today and its a new one, and actually it gave me hope that this one could make me happy. In my class there was a gothic girl who's new too, and I saw some of her cuts, and she told me she didn't like eating in front of people. She's in my class and we are only9. She's really triggering me, and I almost relapsed. I'm scared she will trigger me since I'm gonna see her everyday, that i will go back to cutting and b/p
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Re: Girl triggering me - September 3rd 2013, 11:03 PM

Are you friends with her?. If not i would say try and avoid her but if she got worse it might make you want to more so if you want you could try to talk to her and try and help her stop she will thank you and youll feel easy around her it'll make you both feel better but just please don't cut yourself my friend did cut and I tried to make him feel better I made him stop cutting and I felt sOoOo good to have helped and in sure it'll make you feel good to if you ever need to talk pm me if you want I don't mind I just want to try and help but please don't cut it'll just make things worse so please
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Re: Girl triggering me - September 3rd 2013, 11:31 PM

Hey there!

I'm sorry to hear that you're in a tough situation such as this. Remember that while it's great to help people, you need to take your own feelings into account as well. I think it'd be a good idea to maybe talk to a teacher or an adult and let them know what she's doing to herself so she can get help. Remember, you have the option of keeping this anonymous so she won't necessarily know it's you.

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Re: Girl triggering me - September 4th 2013, 08:30 PM

The thing is I'd love to help her but, I'm scarred it would make me go back to it.
I've got all of exams etc and I'm not friend with the girl you it's just a random girl but wilts all the stress and the fact I know she's self harming tense me a lot.
Before I saw her cuts, I don't think about sh now it's back in my mind, it's an obsession
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Re: Girl triggering me - September 4th 2013, 08:48 PM

As someone who has struggled with my own demons and is now going into a helping profession, I agree with what Cassie said. You can't help anyone very much if you're struggling with the same issues. It's great that you want to help her, but find a way for her to get the help without you having to be the only source of it.

Also, remember that while she can make you want to harm yourself, only you make the decision of whether to do it or not. Unfortunately, the world doesn't adapt because people are triggered by things (or people) and one of the biggest parts of recovery is leaning how to deal with triggers without relapsing. You can do it.

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Re: Girl triggering me - September 7th 2013, 02:54 PM

Hey there

Firstly, congrats on being free for so long That's awesome, well done!

When you work out something triggers you, there are 2 options to combat it - either you learn to avoid the trigger in the future or you find a way to deal with it without self harming.

In this situation, it doesn't sound like avoiding her is an option. So it might be a good idea to try and find a way to deal with the thoughts when they come? Ultimately this has to come from you, as you are the one that knows yourself best - you know your thoughts and what helps you not self harm. But maybe one way is whenever you see her cuts, you can say to yourself something like 'I don't do that anymore' and don't even give yourself an option to do it. Maybe you could wear an elastic band round your wrist and flick it whenever you get the thought.

In terms of giving up self harm in the first place, how did you deal with other thoughts and triggers? If you can look at ways you have dealt with them, you can highlight ways you have beaten these before and use those ways to help you now. Remember the reasons you stopped in the first place and hold onto them. Maybe you could write them down and carry them in your pocket or bag or wherever, then read them if you need to throughout the day.

It sounds like this is going to be a tough battle, but you can do it. You have gone 1 month and 3 weeks which is a great achievement, so I believe you can do this. Belief is one of the key things in the battle to stop - have faith in yourself.

Message me if you ever need anything, you can do this.

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Re: Girl triggering me - September 7th 2013, 04:26 PM

Thank you so much for your tips!!!!!!im gonna try the elastic band
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