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-   -   Triggering (SH): Cant stop...cutting daily (http://www.teenhelp.org/forums/f12-self-harm/t124918-cant-stop-cutting-daily/)

SilentBunny October 21st 2013 07:18 PM
Cant stop...cutting daily
 
So because of whats going on at home i cant stop cutting even for a day, i started with a few cuts,and now have around 20...
See, my sisters being a jerk and is yelling at me and treating me like crud, and everyone else sees this, but they just say, yeah we all know shes like that...nothing we can do. So i am sad and depressed and mad all the time at her, and i end up taking it out by cutting.

Ennui. October 21st 2013 10:34 PM
Re: Cant stop...cutting daily
 
Hey there,

I'm really sorry to hear about what your sister is doing to you. You really don't deserve that at all, you are a really great person and don't need to be treated in the way she is.

Do you know why she is treating you like that? If not, maybe on a day when everything is calm, you can sit down with her and ask her if there is any problem that she has right now that may be causing her to act like that. If you can find out what's going on, maybe you will be able to speak with her and solve it so she can stop doing this.

Maybe you can find things to do to avoid your sister for a while. For instance, if you know she's moody, you can try and stay out of her way a little bit, whether it's going in your room to avoid her, or just not making a whole lot of contact so you can avoid any arguments. Maybe you can even get out of the house for a while, which can help with not only avoiding your sister, but also getting your mind off of her and onto more fun things, rather than self harming. It can be a walk to clear your mind, or something more like seeing a movie, a sport, or going to hang out with someone. It's okay to have fun every once in a while, as well as clear your mind.

Try and find things to do to take care of yourself as well. Maybe you can take a shower then read a good book or watch a movie, or do other hobbies or things that interest you. In other words, focus on you and nobody else, because you deserve time for yourself. Try and find ways to express your emotions differently as well, for instance instead of self harming because of what your sister says, you can write it out or use art or music to express your thoughts. That way not only are you getting it out, but you have a creative piece to add to it! I'm sure you've seen it before but I'll also link you to the alternatives to self harm list so you can have other things to do in the moment.

Remind yourself of all the good qualities and accomplishments you have, or other people think you have as well. Write them down if you need to. They can be anything, whether appearance or personality, small or large. They all add up, and those are the things you should be thinking of when your sister starts in. That way, you have a reminder that sure, your sister may say these things, but they're not true, and look at all of these other great qualities you have! Replace any negative thoughts that may come of her treating you badly with positive ones as well. It may be hard at first, but it trains you to think positively.

Write down or print out encouraging quotes and pictures as well. These serve as a reminder that you CAN do this and you CAN get through this.

Things may be hard for you now, but they won't be this way forever. Keep your head held high and stay strong, you can do this!

-Dez

The Only Exception October 22nd 2013 01:10 AM
Re: Cant stop...cutting daily
 
Hi,

I'm so sorry she's treating you this way. I agree with what Dez said above me, have you asked her why she may be treating you this way? Maybe she's going through a similar situation, and she's taking it out on you and doesn't realize it.

If you feel like you can't talk to her in person, you can always write her a note, saying "Hey, have you been alright lately?" or "I've been feeling kind of down, can we talk over coffee?" and see if she'd be willing to talk with you.

If she isn't willing, you could always hang out with good friends of yours instead. Go see a movie, or go biking, do something enjoyable so that you don't have any spare time to think about cutting. Or, maybe you could talk to one of your friends and they could help you.

Remember: you are worth it, and we don't want to see you hurting. I know you can overcome this, and I believe in you. Stay strong, and if you ever need to PM me, fell free to do so!

SilentBunny October 22nd 2013 02:42 AM
Re: Cant stop...cutting daily
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by The Only Exception (Post 1074963)
Hi,

I'm so sorry she's treating you this way. I agree with what Dez said above me, have you asked her why she may be treating you this way? Maybe she's going through a similar situation, and she's taking it out on you and doesn't realize it.

If you feel like you can't talk to her in person, you can always write her a note, saying "Hey, have you been alright lately?" or "I've been feeling kind of down, can we talk over coffee?" and see if she'd be willing to talk with you.

If she isn't willing, you could always hang out with good friends of yours instead. Go see a movie, or go biking, do something enjoyable so that you don't have any spare time to think about cutting. Or, maybe you could talk to one of your friends and they could help you.

Remember: you are worth it, and we don't want to see you hurting. I know you can overcome this, and I believe in you. Stay strong, and if you ever need to PM me, fell free to do so!
See, i would ask her those questions, but shes always had it out for me, so i think i shall just take your suggestions and hangout with friends...if she allows me. See, she has this kid, and im stuck watching him for awhile everyday while shes in school in the time inbetween when she leaves and when theyre home. So im not really free to go out with friends or anything...

Quote:
Originally Posted by Terabithia. (Post 1074924)
Hey there,

I'm really sorry to hear about what your sister is doing to you. You really don't deserve that at all, you are a really great person and don't need to be treated in the way she is.

Do you know why she is treating you like that? If not, maybe on a day when everything is calm, you can sit down with her and ask her if there is any problem that she has right now that may be causing her to act like that. If you can find out what's going on, maybe you will be able to speak with her and solve it so she can stop doing this.

Maybe you can find things to do to avoid your sister for a while. For instance, if you know she's moody, you can try and stay out of her way a little bit, whether it's going in your room to avoid her, or just not making a whole lot of contact so you can avoid any arguments. Maybe you can even get out of the house for a while, which can help with not only avoiding your sister, but also getting your mind off of her and onto more fun things, rather than self harming. It can be a walk to clear your mind, or something more like seeing a movie, a sport, or going to hang out with someone. It's okay to have fun every once in a while, as well as clear your mind.

Try and find things to do to take care of yourself as well. Maybe you can take a shower then read a good book or watch a movie, or do other hobbies or things that interest you. In other words, focus on you and nobody else, because you deserve time for yourself. Try and find ways to express your emotions differently as well, for instance instead of self harming because of what your sister says, you can write it out or use art or music to express your thoughts. That way not only are you getting it out, but you have a creative piece to add to it! I'm sure you've seen it before but I'll also link you to the alternatives to self harm list so you can have other things to do in the moment.

Remind yourself of all the good qualities and accomplishments you have, or other people think you have as well. Write them down if you need to. They can be anything, whether appearance or personality, small or large. They all add up, and those are the things you should be thinking of when your sister starts in. That way, you have a reminder that sure, your sister may say these things, but they're not true, and look at all of these other great qualities you have! Replace any negative thoughts that may come of her treating you badly with positive ones as well. It may be hard at first, but it trains you to think positively.

Write down or print out encouraging quotes and pictures as well. These serve as a reminder that you CAN do this and you CAN get through this.

Things may be hard for you now, but they won't be this way forever. Keep your head held high and stay strong, you can do this!

-Dez
Huh, cool suggestions Dez! Finding encouraging quotes and pictures as im typing this actually. As for my good qualities and accomplishments...well i haven't accomplished anything, nor do i have good qualities...soo yeah. As for music or art to express my feelings or whatever, yeah that could work! I'll try that. :)


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